How do I know when my girl is actually upset and when she's shit testing me? How often will she pull the shit test card and does it ever end?

Does anyone have general tips on healthy ways to control a relationship?

Be a gentleman but with the mindset that you women is the 3rd priority in your life.
With work and hobbies being 1 and 2.

Also just listen to her and console her don't be a counselor.

Change the subject to a lighthearted one.

Thanks for the advice man. Good stuff.

In your opinion how often should my girl and I go out and hand out with our friends and how often should we stay in?

If we stay in a lot I feel like I'm being boring even if we're having a good time. If we go out a lot I feel like we are not spending enough alone time together.

Depends on the girl. Me and my gf are really not the outgoing type, mainly because of money. Of course we go out casually, have fun parties, go to restaurant when we don't feel like cooking , but you can do a lot of fun things at home too. Watching movies and stuff.

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What I like in life is nothing more but living it.

I like this hierarchy. Definitely the right perspective. Try and get your girlfriend to follow this as well. That will make life so much easier.

shit tests never end

my favorite response is to ignore them

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what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!

Try to go on a date once a week...but mix it up, girls love surprises

Hang out as a group every 2-4 weeks...personally i do this every 8 weeks maybe especially if her friends are annoying, or single - in which case they are annoying.

Women love staying in at home with their man, just as long as you balance this with avoiding routine. Women will lose attraction if there is routine. Mix things up, keep her guessing and you will have a fruitful LTR

Women usually shit test you when they are upset....it not this or that, ying or yang, they shit test to see what they can get away with and to see if you are easy to manipulate.

For example If she is upset with you because you she left her coat in the car and she wants you to go get it then she is testing you to see if you will give in....you have three options in this situation

1# go get the coat (she now knows if she gets mad at you she can get you to do what she wants).

2# You say no you left it in the car why should I go get it for you? would you do the same for me? and then ignore her anger (She learns that her getting mad will do nothing and in the future she will not freak out).

or

3# You say "Ok il go grab you coat but can you go grab me somthing to eat im starving" this now puts you on even playing field because now she has to "earn" what she has asked for.

Now in some situations like if she is not feeling well or had a bad day then you can just be a nice guy and do it for her....if she has a cold and you say "get your own coat" then yes your a dick lol

As for relationship advice:

Always stay calm! be the the rock in the relationship, women are by nature emotional and will freak out from time to time but they expect you to be "alpha" and be a man...be calm and calm them down. As soon as you start to freak out they freak out even more...if a women yells at you then you say "sit down and lets talk but im not going to talk to you in this state so mabey you should cool off for a few minutes and then we can talk about whats wrong". Always keep your cool! to many guys fail at this.

Listen! and I mean really listen to what she says! when she opens her mouth dont be thinking about the next thing your going to say...just listen to how she feels and when shes done say somthing like "ok I didnt know you felt that way about such and such" "Il try to change that for next time". To many PUA's think that they have to be mean all the time and cant ever give in to what a women wants! this is not true! there are still things a women needs and you must listen to them or your relationship will fail.

Make it clear what you need out of the relationship. How is she going to know what you want if you have never told her? sit down and think about what you want and need out of your relationship and then express it to her and of course ask her what she needs....it makes it so much easier then just guessing!

Do nice things from time to time to suprise her! women love this! for example call her up and say "be ready for 6, and wear somthing nice" then take her out on the town....little things like that spice up the relationship.

Sex is always amazing at the start of the relationship but with time it can get boring so always try new stuff! try crazy shit! most women are kinky and if you can make her happy in bed shes no going to look for it eles were....learn how to go down on a women too! lol this will come in handy!

Oh and get in the habit of eating healthy and working out together! people tend to get lazy and let them selfs go in a relationship but if you make it clear that you want to look good for each other it will not only make your sex life better but it will keep your eyes from wondering....we are all men so of course you will look but its alot easier to stay faithful when shes a size 2 then a size 10 haha my gf has is a rocket! and she works out almost every day with me! could have went the other way though

Hobbies must come before work though! and friends before the girly, so #1 hobbies #2 work #3 friends #4 girl

No offense to the guy above but bro's before hoes is a myth if you have a long term meaning full relationship....in the first few months I would say yes this is true but if your gf is a good gf and its been longer then 5-6 months she should be one of your "best friends" in fact she should be you best friend.

imo if you get to the 1 year mark and you dont see a future with the girl and you cant honestly say she is not you best friend then you should not be with her....wasting your time!

Iv been with my gf for 3 years now, she is my best friend and although I love my best friends non of them could replace her...we live together and have shared stuff that I would never share with anyone! and since we have a good relationship I dont have to worry about her geting in the way of my relationships with other friends. Theres only one friend I have dropped because of her and it was a good thing I did because he wasnt as much of a friends as I thought he was....she made me realize he was a dick and not a good friend.

Let put it this way:

A good gf is some one who if they were a guy you would see them as your best guy friend lol sounds odd I know but those are the best relationships....I go to the gym with my gf, watch football and fart in front of my gf haha and she really has no jealousy issues at all! the only difference between her and my best guy friend is that Im attracted to my gf and I get to bang her lol