Hi all,

So many months ago I posted in the forums regarding my girlfriend, her seemingly flirty behavior, and whether I was needlessly being jealous/insecure. To quickly recap those old issues, my girlfriend had a pattern of flirting with guys in front of me and in general behaving in certain questionable ways. Since then things have been going really well and I thought all those old issues were put to bed.

Anyway, something happened yesterday that raised the red flags once again, and I'm back to questioning whether my gut is trying to tell me something or whether it's really in my head.

So I took my girlfriend to a barbecue my aunt was throwing, and all of my cousins were there. One of my cousins is a really good looking guy, and the first time my girlfriend met him I caught her checking him out a few times. No big deal and I never said a word about it--he *is* a good looking guy and I believe that just because you're with someone doesn't mean you don't have a pulse. Anyway, I caught some more glances at the barbecue but again didn't really pay it much mind. Looking is pretty innocent and doesn't have to mean anything, and glances don't necessarily equal checking someone out.

When we were leaving and exchanging goodbyes with everyone, though, something about the way she hugged him didn't sit right with me. This is one of those things that you know will sound ridiculous trying to explain, but I'll try anyway. It wasn't that they hugged that bothered me--all of my family hugged her (and me) goodbye. Rather, it was the way she hugged him--when she was pulling away after the hug she had her hand on his neck, the sort of way you'd expect a girl to be after kissing a guy, not a family member she didn't really know. That's the immediate impression I got--like it was a girlfriend/boyfriend hug--and it hit me pretty hard.

Now I know it was just a hug and such a small thing must sound absolutely ridiculous, and I've asked myself repeatedly if I was just already on the look out for any signs...but I really can't stress this enough: when I saw that I was totally surprised and taken aback, and my gut exploded with an alarm bell.

Nothing else happened and of course I'm not saying a word about this to her, but what do you think? Have you had such gut reactions before? Should you trust your gut in these situations or chalk it up to old insecurities or looking for things that don't really exist?

Nahh trust your gut man, not saying break up with her, but trust your gut

Yep, agreed with the guy above. If there's one thing all of us have learned at one point or another, it's that your instinct is right 99% of the time.

To be completely honest, your gut is right. I have been with girls like this in the past, and at first I would ignore my gut. After a few years I realized I had to trust my gut instinct because it is usually right. I'm not saying your gf is cheating right now, but I can already tell you she is not LTR material. Everything may go fine for quite a while, but there are more people in the world then just you two, and when a guy comes along that she likes enough, she will cheat/leave/lose interest in you. Sorry man, I'm just speaking from my own experience. It is especially disrespectful she is doing this kind of thing with your cousin, but she knows she can because she didn't really "do" anything, and if you bring it up, you will be made to feel like a fool.

Yeah man trust your gut, I ain't gunna say break up,
But I'd personally give her a last chance (without telling her)

For your personal happiness you should simply avoid any kinda girl that makes you feel that way.

_________________
Always be one step ahead of your emotions,
Take warning signs seriously.

+1 for going with your gut. I've been in the position a few times where my gut was telling me to eject, but I stuck it out and got burned.