Hi guys,

First of all I want to state that I trust my boyfriend entirely and am very secure in his feelings for me.

However, there is a new girl at his work who just won't leave him alone. Everytime I have gone to pick him up from work, she starts calling him pet names and touching him. He says things like "hey hands off the merchandise" and stuff but she seems to take it as if he is flirting with her. I try and talk to her to be friendly but she just ignores me and stares at my boyfriend.

When my boyfriend talks to me or touches/kisses me in front of her, she just stares and then shoots me nasty looks. Also, everytime he is working with her and he is speaking to me on the phone, she will start calling him the pet names and giggling and just flirting. She even has his phone number (which apparently she got off another colleague) and calls him at stupid hours of the night. He never answers her calls but she doesnt stop calling.

I answered his phone for him one time because he was driving and asked me to answer it (when she called from priavate number) and she was really nasty to me on the phone. My boyfriend has told me he doesnt even like her even as a friend and they have never hung out together outside of work. I know he isnt lying because he is always with me. He doesnt do the classic cheating signs like cancel dates with me or go and have private phone calls or anything like that. Which leads me to believe this chick is a delusional freak.

Anyways my question is, is there any way to deter this girl from my boyfriend and what would be the PUA way to kind of AMOG her to make sure she leaves us alone??

Thanks guys - any help is appreciated

I suggest you tell your boyfriend to talk to her and explain the situation properly. Don't try and go around this by, for example, purposely ignoring her because it will only lead to more frustration from her side.

She needs to get it. BACK OFF. Either tell your boyfriend to talk to her, or you do it yourself. Whichever you choose, it has to be done.

... Oh and if you decide to talk to her yourself - first tell your boyfriend about your plan so you don't seem like a jealous girlfriend going behind her boyfriend's back and telling people to back off.

But that was pretty obvious though.

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It's good that you show 'nervousness' at this. This is the equivalent of a guy being jalous for his girl. That being said, make sure you let your bf know that you trust him in this. You clearly do wich is the perfect attitude for you to have.

Now, if I was him I would tell the girl. " If you keep on contacting me outside of work, I will have to have a discussion with your supervisor." Make sure he talks to his supervisor as well and explains the situation. This is flat out improper behavior and why I never advise people to flirst at work.

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Just as it would be if the situation were reversed, any attempt YOU make to shoo her away or otherwise separate the two of them will only result in pushing them closer together. It could also have the added side effect of emasculating your man (i.e., making him feel like you don't think he can handle his business).

On the other hand, if you are supremely sweet and nice to this girl and she continues to be a bitch, it will become obvious to him what her intentions are and he will probably nip it in the bud himself. As the old adage goes, kill 'em with kindness.

Your boy,
870

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Thank you so much guys!! All of your help is grealty appreciated!! =)

Hey fill us in on how it goes! This is gonna be good...

Hey guys,

I am trying all of your suggestions... I have seen her a couple of times at BFs workplace and whenever she does what she does, I am just acting super nice to her. Like saying shit like how pretty she looks and stuff. When I said this stuff, my boyfriend looked at me like I was a crazy person but i just winked at him and explained to him later. He thinks its "cute" that I'm jealous and keeps telling me I got nothing to worry about. I really like the straw man technique and have been trying to use it....

In regards to him saying stuff like "hands of the merchanise" I know she probably takes this as flirting cos he used to say it to me before we started going out. However, the difference is when he said it to me, he would then touch me or get really close to me and whisper something in my ear like "you know you gotta pay for it... How much do you owe me now?" whereas with her, when he says it, he doesnt follow it up with anything (that I know of!!) and he sounds serious when he says it. But she just seems to hang on his every word. And yes I agree, my man is a PUA and is totally addicted to female attention - this doesnt worry me cos I know he only wants to come home to me and wouldnt cheat. He is a sociable person and just loves to talk and stuff.

Last night though BF told me he was working with her (while on the phone to me) and she started doing her usual things in the background so I asked to speak to her. She got on the phone and was acting all sweet and innocent in front of him and I asked her if she wanted to go and get coffee one time or something - just me and her. I told her she seems like a really cool person and I would like to be friends with her. She sounded a little shocked but agreed.

So I have a date with her!! I'm going to "kill her with kindness", try and make her a "friend" and see how she goes trying to go after my boyfriend once we are besties! My boyfriend thinks I'm being really mature about this and is proud of me. Girl fighting has to be so sneaky...

This is like a soap opera Do keep us informed!