Hey guys,

I have been seeing this girl for the past 3weeks and things are going great. We have been hanging out on a regular basis, having fun, hooking up. The only thing is she has a bf of five years. So she says now that she is really into me and doesn't know whether she wants to start dating me or stay with her bf.
We decided she should think about it and get back to me. I'm wondering if I should keep the comfort going or if I should just give her space and time to think. I won't see her for the next five days and she will be spending thanksgiving with her current bf. This girl is pretty cool and I would like the relationship to progress. What would you guys do?

Imagine you being her boyfriend... how would you feel if you found out she dated (possibly cheating) another boy?

My advice to you is to show some respect to her current boyfriend (humanity) and stay away until she break up with him.

- Consistence

I dont understand that you can even do this, mostly because of the fact that she is with another guy still, telling him "i love you" , probably fucking him. If yo udevelop feelings for this girl you're going to get hurt dude.

She will probably stick to her boyfriend, its just more convenient.

BTW have you guys kissed/more?

Edit: oh and I would freeze her out until she decided for herself.

Well the situation is like this we went to the city last weekend ended up having sex and several times since. I blew her f#cking mind - multiple orgasms every time. She's always telling me how attracted she is to me. Oh and we work together. Lucky bastard, I know.

Her living situation is kinda odd too. She lives with her bf but they have separate rooms and I guess haven't really talked for the last two weeks (heard the no talk bit from a mutual friend). She kinda described to me she doesn't want to leave her current bf because she has invested 5 years into the relationship.

So if I freeze her out ... I'm thinking I'll tell her that you need sometime to think about this and I am going to give us both some space to think and we can talk in week about this.

hm advice is to get out of there while you still can. I recently went through this exact situation - girl had a boyfriend of 2/3 years and then i started hooking up with her on a regular basis and my first thought was " if she is cheating on her bf with me... whats gonna stop her from cheating on me with someone else".

I decided to stay with it though because it was fun and whatever, but sure enough 3 weeks later she was hooking up with another guy. I knew it was eventually gonna happen but that didnt make it any easier once it actually happened. Anyways..to sum it up, i wouldnt bother with it, its not worth ur time. Good Luck, hope that helped you out

Yeah I also forgot to mention this, this is true. Sure you're special to her now, sure you blew her mind, but there's always someone who can do better than you and who will make her feel even better and if she switches that easily she will not stay true to you.

are you mentally sane ? why would you date her?

there are girls who are probably better and trustworthy, and those are single.
they are alot easier to handle.

now imagine this ... she says she got feelings for you '' she doesn't know if she wanna date me or stick with her boyfriend''

she is saying she has feelings for you both and you are both on the same value level in her opinion.

AKA she has feelings for you but also for her current BF..... dude kick yourself in your ass , what if you fuck her or and she's starting feeling guilty.

what if she doesn't feel guilty and she doens't care ... she probably cheats on you to.

don't burn your fingers at this one ..... really....... 'the mess it creates - it's not worth it. she talks stupid she sounds immature by saying that shit....... this girl doesn't know the defenition of the word '' relationship''.

but how about you be a dick and keep doing it. Maybe her BF is a insane motherfucker and he will go bad when he hears of this shit.
Read the newspaper ... people get stabbed because they cheated ....


OR you could contact her boyfriend and tell him all about it and how you feel bad about it.
you will get respect
you will respect them both
you will respect yourself

breaking her trust at this point is allowed... i mean she already broke her BF trust by thinking and telling you without telling him !
you will enlighten yourself .. you will get huge kudo's from everyone

stop thinking with your ego .... getting involved with her will hurt her BF .... it's getting better while hurting other people. imagine you being her BF and she cheats on you.
it's the same as the diamond operations in sierra leone .... the diamond industy wants the daimonds so bad they use other people - they hurt other people to get what they want.... a few years later it turned out to be a scandal.

it's not why you get it

it's how you get and what you get

you know what she is ? she's a leech ... she leech around people until she finds something better - she wants more and more and more withtout realizing the definition or what she really wants.

you get let her leech on your dick until she finds something better , notice the blood-loss . girls like these can drain you financially and emotionally.

o yeah and before i forget to mension .. you don't have relationship it's not like your together , she has a relationship with you while fucking her BF ?
yeah sure......

there are many girls out there who are single and better than her, by dating those you won't hurt anyone ( well you will be hurting yourself if you have to pay for each date )

o yeah .... i got cheated 2 times ..... the first time was bad.. i beated her new BF into the hospital ( regretting it ).. ..... the second time i didn't care and gamed some other girls instead of being whimpy..
hopefully you won't share the same fate.

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ok but im also agreeing with consitence .... at least wait until she breaks up, BUT DO freeze her out.

you should not manipulate or influence her into doing that , it has to be her own choice. by being present you already influence her.

freeze out until she breaks -up , if she doesn't break up ( from the sound of everything their relationship is far from good ) she's a leech .... she will probably do the same with some other guy she meets.

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I cant give advice to help game. Id walk away. I dont knowingly date chicks with dudes, nor do I even try to game them if I know they are in deep relationships. I guess, it just an ethic I hold onto.

Just for fun - fine.

But forget all the romatic allusions, this girl is not GF/relationship material if u ask me.

If she's been having sex/hanging with the same guy for 5 years, of course, you are going to give her multiple orgasms. He's probably confortable and acting beta.

I cant give advice on gaming her. I guess, the way to win her is to throw her in hyper-romantic mode and play the rake/the opposites of her bf - the escape from boring beta bf. But dude, i dont think it will last. This is whole another planet to me. I cant date anyone knowing she is sleeping with someone else. In fact, I think you have already shown a weakness which to me goes against all the rules. But hey, everyone is different.

You have to understand she is using her bf as a security blanket and you as an extension. Once she is exclusively with you, chances are she will see all sorts of flaws in you. You will have to be very dominant. Im not a believer in the whole "rebound" thing but I have rarely seen a relationship work which spawned out of another cheating. (I have one I know of but both parties have now cheated on each other multiple times now. Unbelievably, they decided to stay together. Long story...dont ask)

If she cheats once with you, she will cheat again. Trust me. I have seen it so many times and even with the guys that these girls claim are "the one"

Last night she got into a fight with her BF, called me up and came over. We ended up having sex a few times. I told her I have no expectations as to how our or their relationship evolves. That's how I started this and lost sight when I started liking her more.

All you guys thanks for the reality bitch slap - I needed that. I am looking for a LTR and what's to stop her from cheating again? I am a dominant dude, but I'm not about to go confront her BF on the situation. It's not out of fear, it's out of a lack of interest in pursuing her in a relationship, if she is in fact a "leech". I need to see more of who this girl really is. Thanks for this Lodewijkp
A freeze out until they break up is a good idea.

I want a girl who knows where she is going in life and not afraid to get. That's how I run my life and want a girl who knows how to do the same.

Thanks again guys

i agree with the other posters. although im not categorically against pursuing other girls that have BFs, because sometimes they are in a bad relationship and are just too afraid to get out of it. you could be the thing that gives her the strength to get out of a bad thing.

but if its not a bad relationship, and shes just a cheating whore, then like timberlake says, what goes around comes around. if you pursue it, be physically available but not emotionally available or you eventually will be headed for a world of hurt.

good luck.