Hey guys,

Thanks everyone to the replies to my last thread.

here-vp297923.html#297923

Everything turned out great. Ive been in a relationship with a girl for 4 months now, we've known each other for 7 months and I know it sounds silly but we fell in love and were very happy. We've only both been in love twice before. She is a very attention seeking type, flirty, and loves the fact that guys like her, but will never let it on, she pretends to be very independant and strong, but if a guy she knows likes her, and is stopping to like her, she doesnt like it. very immature, but hey.
Apart from that, she is an amazing girlfriend. she affectionate, loving, best sex, cooks and so on.


So last week, I took the advice of some and I ignored her, and she kept txting me and told me to come over (I visit her once a week for a few days) I saw her phone and realised she was stressing over me going over to a houseparty full of my ex's and other girls. We opened up and after lots of sex and talking, things seemed great again. I teased her and made fun and play fighted and was in control again.

I got back, and there was something she told me not to tell my friend. It wasnt a major secret. Her ex ( her doormat, I mean this guy is still chasing her after 2 years, drives her mum and her everywhere, even drived her old boyfriend around for her. does everything for her. he's the worse lay she's had, everyone knows, its not just what she told me, and I dont find him a threat at all) She says he's like a brother a close friend.
He works with a good friend of mine, and my friend quit work. but the boss has told everyone he fired him and he stole money. Her ex told her and she told me, and said dont tell anyone, he doesnt want to be known as a gossip.

at this point my friend hadnt heard the rumours and when i asked him whats happened with work, he said he quit and i said well, it seems like these rumours are going around...

I told her I told him, not thinking it was a big deal and she kinda flipped. "I trusted u, i dont havent trusted guys so quickly before, why did u do it and blah blah." I put our relationship on the same level as my friends and uve broken the trust.
Supposedly if the rumours go back, her ex could be fired.

So I do actually feel bad. I made a mistake and it wasnt my business really, and Ive broken her trust.
She says its gonna take awhile for her to trust me again and she wont tell me stuff. that this shows her friends are more trustworthy and blah blah. that i showed my loyality to my friend (which ive known just as long as her and not that close to)

So she's been kinda beating my balls about it. but making me feel guilty not shouting, but saying, its happened now and lets move forward and see what happens. i dont trust u completely anymore.

She has been txting me less. much much less. she wont txt me for hours, till sometimes she goes to sleep. whereas before she would txt me every 5 mins. i know shes working, but she has time to go on her phone and update her facebook but not reply to me and im sure she txts other ppl.

I know its girly of me, but I want that feeling of control again.
After the arguement, I thought we were gonna break up, and asked do u want me to come over still? she said yeah... i know bad move on me.

I hate being the one who chases, and has to wait for replies and now that ive made this mistake, i feel like she is in control.
she is a good friend of mine anyway and I want her trust back and want the relationship strong again.
In a way, I know she trusts me like before but is just saying it.

So, how can I get control again? how can I get her where she wont ignore my txts or phone calls for hours. and I only send 1, I never ring twice or send 2 txts, Im not that bad.

How can I get her excited again and wanting to txt me and again for her to trust me.

Im going over 2moro. and one thing we do well is sex. I dominate her pretty badly and no1 fucks her like i do, she loves it. and 2moro im gonna tie her up, blindfold her and fuck her for hours. we spoke about doing it before our arguement and she still said she wants to do it.


I dont act needy, or jealous in front of her. I always act like i dont care. i tease her, make fun of her, but play with her and love her. I dont tell her dont do this or dont do that. Im good like that.

But right now, even though emotionally, I feel wanting to make love to her, I know I would lose like that. I show my domination and act like normal.

She was telling me about a guy who keeps txting her, he wants her and so and so. she told me because she doesnt want me to find out and think she was hiding it from me. i understand that and like that, but i know she wanted me to be jealous too.

So guys, be gentle, how can i get her to trust me, how can i get control again when ive made the mistake. and even though i want to be emoitional in bed, ill be dominate and try and act as things are normal.

Thanks guys

To be honest, Ive made loads of mistakes, Ive been reading. Is there a thread on how to keep things good in a relationship.

For exmaple, 2 no no's ive done. 2 weeks ago i bought her flowers, a lil teddy and a letter saying we're having a great time, and things i like about her. I havent done anything like that before.

2day, after all these problems lately, i txt her and said, u want to go out 2moro nite for dinner and ill cook either monday or tuesday.
She gave me a call and i missed it and i called her back 10mins later and she didnt pick up, she was at work, but now its 1.30am and she hasnt txt me all day.....

the reason i asked to cook dinner was cause i was teasing her about her cooking and i messed up on the potatoes and i said ill knock her socks off when i cook her a good meal.


so how can i recover. I want to be the alpha, but want to keep this girl

It's simple. Freeze her out for a while. Seriously ZERO contact, if she texts you don't reply. 3 days maybe, a week. It'll be hard, because I can tell you're really into this bird, but trust me it'll be worth it.

If you think you fucked up, have you tried an honest apology and made up for your mistake?

im a little bit late replying
shit test .... manipulation from her side to get on top of you, also by telling you she gets acceptance to text him again - she was waiting on your response about it.

if this texting goes on too long put your foot down, you don't have to coop with this shit.
don't say plain sorry .... just do something fun and tell her after ( or later ) tell her you didn't meant to cross her boundaries - this sounds mature.
saying plain sorry sounds like you don't care and woman are very whiny about this, also when you say plain sorry she could easily use that to control you by behaving like it's a big point.

what do you say sorry about ? spreading the news or breaking her trust - by telling you didn't mean to cross her boundaries you will do both without sounding whiny.

and don't tell you've fucked up.... most guys say : im sorry i fucked up my bad can i make it up to you
you chopped of your dick and handed it to her when you say stuff like this

you could also say you don't fucking care actually ..... you only care about you breaking her trust.
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don't feel bad we are all human ..

REALLY

do you really think she didn't gossip or broke peoples trust in her life?
maybe she's gossiping about you right now or her best friend, she's just playing victim here and she's kinda right tho but she is overdoing it.

Don't feel bad we are al human im 100 % sure she gossipped about you with her girlfriend - we are human for that.

it wasn't your business , but do you really broke her trust ? maybe she's comfortable playing the victim here, she's fucking acting like you cheated like you slept with another girl ... fucking hell she needs to grow up a bit.

here's the deal ... stop feeling bad as long you feel bad she has control, mindset : don't give a shit but pretend like you give a shit.

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by buying this stuff you rewarded her whiny behaviour ..... stop being afc.... did she ever bought you flowers and a teddy bear ? probably not .....
you don't owe her and she doesn't owe you, it was 2 weeks ago and you can't really repair or revert that right now.

next time say : i want to buy some flowers for you ... but i realized when did you ever bought me flowers ?
turn it around.... let her feel bad about it ...

she needs to know what she miss, make her remember - make her feel like she is priority 2 instead of priority 1.
about the cooking who cares ... does she invite you to cook ? at least you try, don't feel bad about fucking the patatoes up .. buy a cookbook and practice.
true tthis way you can test if she's still worth it ...... when freezing out a week ( or little longer) and her still not contacting you .. well then you can say she isn't worth it . it is a good self control method .. you will learn to contain yourself and forget al those dramatic episodes.

don't freeze her to death tho ...

your doing to many no no's ...... just realize what your doing and bought for her, now realize what she did or bought for you lately ?
probably not much - she isn't a princess and it's time to realize that.

fuck her ex.... he's a fucknig loser ... who drives everybody around like that .. he needs to get a life. it's all a bunch of pathetic shit and you need to wake up - give yourself a kick in the ass and wake up. DON'T comply or take part in this pathetic shit .. don't buy her stuff instead BUY YOURSELF SOME STUFF. don't make her the center of the universe, god didn't make her the center of the univere so you have to stop making her your center.
kinda controlish .. attention approval seeking type.......
yeah sure .. il bet she's nice but she is behaving weird right now .. a little bit like a bitch , im sure you are crazy about her and you love her - but that doesn't mean she loves you equally ( right now, she probably did )

there are 1000000 woman out there that are nice, good in bed and in cooking....she isn't the only princess

instead of being in the backseat get back to the steering wheel ... how ? i don't know what's good for you and neither does other people on this forum . However make yourself the center of the universe develop yourself convey lack of neediness go to the gym do other things.

go out gaming maybe go sarging alone get extra-confident , everybody will feel your aura you confidence.

don't steer you GF but steer yourself ... she isn;t the driver she is only a passenger.

1. mindset
2.priority difference
3. treat yourself like a princess

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AK-47...When you absolutely positively have to kill every fucking orc in the room
questions about herbal medicine here-vp582526.html#582526

Some lines later: LOL. Cracked me up.

Anyway I'm in the same situation here... kinda just letting her go at the moment and I'll see how things go when I see her. Hope she calls me tonight but I doubt it...

Lodewijkp Thanks from me too.

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Hi, I need your female opinion on this...

AAHHAH the guy with the AK as his pic cracked me up bad! Good stuff!

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There is NO secret ingredient. Theres just you.

Thanks guys for your help and replies.

Lodewijkp thank you for getting back to me, great advice.
Unfortunetly I lost web access till today, but I dont think much damage has been done.

About the guy txting her, yeah, he was all over her through text, begging her for sex, saying i dont understand why 2 friends cant have a night of fun together and, then replying plzzzzzzz, and all sorts. I couldnt read her replies, but obviously it didnt sound like she was flirting back.

She was telling me how he's really passed the line and pissing her off now.
Im kind of use to it, she always has guys trying something. and theres this new guy, the one from a couple of weeks ago, he's very camp and lonely guy, going through a hard time and its obvious he's gonna fall her soon cause she helps him out.

Anyway, I thot she was gonna be cold and try and get me to apologize and be in control.
She was actually very nice, never mentioned it again. very affectionate. I think the tying her up and fucking her brains out and then making love to her worked. couple days later she squirted for the first time and kept apologizing and I was telling her to shut up and joking with her, she didnt shut up for hours and kept talking at 2am, lol.

Ill read over the reply again Lodewijkp.

But Im having trouble her txting back now days. I wont even txt her sometimes and after a day ill txt her and she'll take ages replying or doesnt till the next day.
I want her to want me so bad again and want to txt me and have that same feeling again. not that anything is wrong now, but dont want her to get bored.

The other day a friend of mine declared her love for me after years and when my girlfriend found out she didnt like it, was nice to see she cared and make comments like well go home and get ur leg over her and then chuckle. But I know she was a little bothered about it.
So any tips on how to make things fresh and exciting would be great.

Thanks again guys