"Tell me that I am doing good"



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PostPosted: Wed Jun 24, 2009 8:40 pm 
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Joined: Wed Sep 10, 2008 7:50 pm
Posts: 85
Location: Vienna, Austria
"Tell me that I am doing it good"
"Tell me that nothing bad will happen today"
"Tell me that I will write the best mark in uni tomorrow"
"Tell me that my dog will survive"
"Tell me everything will be alright"
etc

I am wondering, are these one type of those stealthy, subtle shit tests from HSE HBs in relationships that even PUAs fail some times because they don't notice them as shit tests? (Like those relationships "I know my man is damn hot alpha but once in a while i'm subconsciously checking if he is still worth it")
Or are my thoughts just bullcrap, what do you think?
I don't feel good answering these questions in a positive way. Especially when my GF wanted me to say that her dog will not die (when it was ill), and I told her of course it will survive. The next day it was dead. Sick feeling.

Hawk


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PostPosted: Fri Jun 26, 2009 4:15 pm 
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Joined: Sun Apr 12, 2009 7:52 am
Posts: 1037
Website: http://pickupfixup.wordpress.com/
Location: Brisbane, Australia
She sounds super dependant.

I firmly believe you should always tell a person what they need to hear, not just what they want to hear.

She's not going to respect you anyway, if you keep insincerely telling her what she "expects" to hear.

She sounds like she has almost zero capacity to face things internally herself. Giving in to her wining is the last thing you should be doing for her, if you really want to help her.

Something like "I can't tell you how your dog will cope with this - I can't read the future, no one can. Best thing for you to do right now is try to come to terms with the fact that your dog is pretty ill. You can only hope for the best, we can't do anything else about it."

Let it serve as a reminder that our time on earth is finite, and life is fragile. She's wasting hers expecting people to predict the future for her, instead of taking control of her own future.


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