Hello all PUAs out there. I've read a lot on the forum, but now i need to post. Ok, I was damn stupid last night. Studying PU for about 2 years, I failed recognizing a major shit test. Maybe it was so big I didn't see it. Me and my GF (an HB9) have been dating 4-5 months. Yesterday after playing with eachother in the cinema and walking out of a boring psychoanalasys movie before it finished, she said she wanted to do a psychological test on me which her mother (former psychologist) had used, for fun.

I thought whatever, I don't care, I don't have anything to hide, this is harmless bullshit (BS) etc. So back home we did it.

She presented scenarios and I was imagined what I would see there, or do.

Result: I'm protecting myself from others/closed person because I saw a spider in the forest (partially true, but sometimes I'm very open, I'm on good way of getting rid of my social anxiety issues), I don't have any natural talents because I didn't see any basement in the house there (total BS), I don't have any family issues since I didn't see them inside the house (BS, I told her my father sometimes beat us with his belt, and washing our mouths with soap when I was a kid, but she dismissed it as irrelevant for this part of the test, since it was punishment, and not issues I couldn't predict. Why the hell did I tell her), sex is not the biggest thing in my life since the house didn't have a bedroom, and the river wasn't very wide (BS, now I'm suddenly the guy for whom sex isn't so very important), I'm not a go-getter since I told the friendly people in the boat 50m from the shore to come pick me up, instead of taking a small boat and rowing out to them (BS, I work constantly to grow, and gain knowledge to reach goals, like dating/climbing big walls, have a fulfilling rich life), etc. etc.

She also passed so fast from one scenario to the next that I barely got time to finish the last one, she's not a shrink so she's not good. Like with any fortune teller or horoscope some things were true, but many were just BS. I felt it was a very unreliable and unfair test, and we were discussing that for a good while. But she really believes in this shit.

I felt it was a HUGE DLV-spike. It was difficult for me to discuss without it looking like I was in denial or defending myself, because for 90% i wasn't. I feel labelled, exposed, vulnerable, Betafied, de-mystified. And that would be OK, as long as I could agree and knew it was true and fair. But when she now "knows who i am" and will judge me and see everything I do in this new light, I feel extremely provoked and uncomfortable.

She got this "hmmmm" clever, sly look on her face, saying things like "Hmmm, now I know a lot about you" and "Some people use this kind of information to manipulate other people". Couples can use their whole lives figuring these things out, and now it's supposed to be all figured out in a 20 minute test??? The test adressed the biggest most important things in life. It's not that easy, it's not black and white!

I tried not to look too affected by it, even though I was extreeemely provoked. Later I may have come off as just a little bit cold towards her before going to bed.

I could'nt sleep, got out of bed and watched some docu until late. She comes out and asks why I'm not in bed, I say I'm just not tired and act like nothing. 2AM I go to bed, she starts groping me, and we have almost the wildest sex ever. Hmmm, maybe I confused/scared her by leaving her in bed not giving a reason for it, and then 2 hours later going back to bed holding around her (mixed signals).

We haven't talked after that since she went to work 8AM today and I woke up 10AM (my day off today). I'll be talking to her later today.

I hate the feeling of her thinking that she "got me figured out" when it's not true, and that I lost all my mystery, the feeling of beeing misunderstood. Now I'm a closed person with no natural talents who thinks sex isn't that important and that does not puruse goals. It's a real killer for me... it destroys all I've worked for and built with my PU skills, i'm sure you can understand my frustration and disappointment. How can I go on like this?

Ok, thanks for reading this far...

My question is simple:
-Should I supress my feelings and pretend like nothing's bothering me and never mention the test again, and let her have her misconceptions about me?
-Or should I tell her how unfair and wrong it feels, and how she will see through a wrong/false filter if she really believes everything from the test?

I feel the first one is most intuitive to seem "cool and unaffected". But something tells me I should tell her how I feel. But how do I do it without looking like a wussie? How would an Alpha tell it?

Thanks for any input, you guys are great...

This post is a monument to over-thinking things. You need to chill the fuck out, bro.

You just wrote like 6 paragraphs ... about some dumb psychological game your girlfriend played with you and teased you about? Seriously?

Do you honestly think she is thinking about this right now? Do you think she'll even remember it in a month?

My advice: lighten up!

Your boy,
870

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Oh she might remember, but the point still stands - why the fuck should you care? If you're alpha, and you know it's BS, then all of it would roll off your back and you would continue to behave in a way that's NOT congruent with that BS she came up with.

My opinion -
You can't tell her anything. 1. It'll show it affected you and lower your value. 2. It won't work anyway - don't forget, reasoning doesn't work with women, it's feelings. Actions speak louder than words.

You are letting yourself get unsettled by this as if it somehow matters that she thinks these things.

Something I'm appreciating more and more in recent times is that sometimes, someone doesn't deserve you engaging them on their level - you have to call them out, brush them off, freeze them out, whatever - Eg. if someone comes out with a comeback that is just stupid but they fully believe they "got you", and your mind is going "UGH I MIGHT DIE FROM THE STUPIDITY" and your lack of response out of disbelief is gonna be interpreted as proof that they got you, the wrong thing to do is respond to that statement. The right thing to do is step back and take it somewhere else, somewhere higher and simpler, like "I honestly expected more from you than that." and end the conversation there, change topic, talk to someone else, leave, whatever, let them know they crossed the line, and your opinion of them has lowered.

I think your situation is like that. You got to train yourself to accept what you know is true - that is all BS. You don't have to sit around waiting for the moment when she tries to use the BS... that would imply that you have to be ready to do something "different" to counteract what she believes about you. The actual truth is (and you know this) that the BS is not you, and so if you keep being you, then whenever (IF ever) the moment comes where she tries something based on the BS she "found out" about you, it will fail, and she will be wrong.

It's time for YOU to put on the sly, knowing grin, because you know that test is full of shit, and she's no psychologist.


The vibe I get of her from reading your post... I can't put it into words, but I'm reminded of the young girls I used to talk to in my late teens, who would purport themselves to be "ex hackers" or something like that, because it was cool - and really all it was was them trying to feel like they had some sort of power because they're used to not having any. Like a kid playing a game. They would drop that facade the second it came under scrutiny, and try to change topic. I'd say that's what this is to her - just a little fun exercise for her to feel like she has a bit of power, and she's probably not taking it as seriously as you are.

Thanks for the replies guys, it cleared my head up pretty good. I really need to work on my tendency to overthink. Yes, why should I care? I mean, she really seemed to believe in it, but as long as I know it's BS she can think whatever she wants. My actions will prove her wrong in the long term. If I ignore it and smile at it I win

Your vibe about her that she's trying to feel like she has some power because she's not used to having any is probably true, since she is from a culture where women don't have much power (some place in eastern Europe, but from a rich family and lived 4 years here in western europe working in the family oil/gas business, so I haven't found me a golddigger, hehe), so it makes it easier for me to keep power, but I need to watch out so she doesn't get any when she gets used to our equal rights culture.

Also she points to a guy in town and tells me she recognizes him in his leather jacket from Match dating site, and says me and him were the only two persons she liked (I know that 300 contacted her). He looked handsome and charismatic, but older than me (I'm 29, she's 24).

Is it ok to say things like "Oh he's handsome, or he seems nice why didn't you go for him?". I asked "how old is he?", she goes "36", and I kinda made fun of her by saying "That's ooold". What would the default response be to this test?

Yeah I know, I have much to learn At least I went from my two UGs before learning about PU, to a HB7 and now an HB9. Me out of 300 guys on the dating site, much thanks to David D and his C&F

Keep rolling!