So Ive been dating this girl for about 3 weeks. I've only met up with her about 4 times, she seems to be very busy, and I try to appear that way aswell, so it seems as though we are in a constant battle to set the terms of a meet up.

we had sex about a week and a half ago for the first time. and since then we constantly text each other. but I have been trying to meet up with her a couple times but it seems as though saturday is good for her, and not good for me type deal.

So I finally got fed up and decided to take it a step back and ask her to go for a coffee this weekend. her response was that she was busy all weekend.

So at this point i figured it was over. So I texted her say "K I get it, take Care" basically saying that I know when im being bown off.

but then she replies "sorry for being busy" I figured if it was over she would just leave it at that.

So I replied back "Dont be sorry, Its just clear that u dont want to hang out anymore"

Then she gets back to me with this "hey, its not that i dont want to hang out with u, its just right now i see us as friends, I'd like to hang out as friends, and as for this weekend I swear im not lying when i said i was busy"

What is this chick trying to do?! Please help this is the first time in years I haev let a girl get into my head like this, and its interfearing with my life! but i really like her, and want her, but dont want her to own my balls. what do i do?

Well it doesnt matter what I tell you, you won't do as I say because you'll believe my advice is wrong.

But oh well seeing as you asked.

I would take a complete step back, drop her for a while and pursue other interests and women etc etc, when she texts you because you've not been in touch (and she will) act as if nothings wrong but dont give her the time of day... by that I mean Her: Hey you ok? Long time no speak xxx. You: Hey yeah i know been really busy , yeahh im good thanks. .... Notice no kisses nothing. kisses are for friends, and love you's are for GFs (even though I dont say it often to my GF)

Yeah thats what I would do. Be interesting to see how you see my advice.

Hey Bro, Thanks for the advice,but I responded to her before you replied. However, I took a similair but more drastic approach.

I texted her back "I dont think thats going to work, its probably better if we dont see each other again. Take Care" I then removed her off my face book and blocked her on msn(to show i am serious, and so keep her guesing as to what is going on with my life)

She then texted back
"ok. sorry it has to be that way. take care."

Let me explain my reasoning. I said this to her because I wanted closure, I dont want to sit by the phone hoping she will text me 2 weeks from now in the hope i get another chance. I really like her, but I need to move on and get on with my life, this girl has made me nothing but miserable due to her shadynes ever since i met her, I havent been working out, or doing much of anythign productive. it really sucks because I dont ussually fall for girls. I'm just glad I fucked her otherwise that would bug me for a really long time. At this point im ready to move on, and if she tries to contact me again in the future, then great(I think). i will definatly take your advice and give her the cold shoulder...Thanks

what do you think? Did I make a mistake? and do you think she will contact me again even though I ended it?

Well to me if she was making you miserable then WELL DONE I am really pleased for you, it takes great will power to shut off a girl you've fallen for and I had to do it about 3 months ago, horrible stage of my life, she had me cuffed for 6 whole months of ups and downs, Im glad you did what you did for your sake.

If she contacts you dont respond, it sounds like she might be trying to trap you again. And also I hope your doing this for the right reasons and not in any hope that she'll come running back because she won't, sounds like she has someone else, so what fuck her! She missed out and hes got a smaller dick than you NEXT!



Hope your feeling better

You can kill this with too much strategy too.

She's got you on the second tier of value. So she's penciled you in as an AFC.

Getting "even" or upset and being too available will re-inforce her thoughts on you. SO not returning texts or picking up the phone tells her you're mad.

Ask yourself,,, would a level 10 player give a crap if this broad was too busy to see him? WOuldn't he have so much cool shit to do that he would not care care at all? WOuld stuff like that hurt his feelings?

I'd say just play it cool. But playing it cools means it's not a "play". It means just being a fu$king happy guy and don't worry about it.

That's a very attractive powerul vibe for women, if it's real.

So if she's busy, cool. If she just wants to be friends cool.

I don't care, because I got my own agenda to run when the time is right.

Just another angle to approach this with....

Thanks for the advice fellas im feeling alot better.. kinda..

I've been in a similar situation as of late. Me and my girlfriend broke up about a month ago, ended up hooking up again about 2 weeks after, then nothing but cold from her. No response to texts, calls, nothing. Finally she just said she needed space. I was kinda tore up by it but had to move on, so I end up getting a number from this hostess at a local restaurant and we go out Thursday night, take a few pictures together, then put them on facebook. Guess who gets jealous and explodes on me the next day? Yeah... Like her being cold sucked but now I've even lost her friendship, and it really does pain me to see her like this, and I love this girl dearly, but the pain I'm feeling right now reminds me that even though she's completely written me off, when I had only tried to get my life started again after her dropping me, meant that she was still controlling my emotions. I still care about her and want her friendship at least, but for her to have this much of an affect on me isn't healthy, especially since she says I broke her trust. My focus is flawed right now. But I have to sever the ties. It hurts, but it's what has to happen for ME to be happy. These are growing pains man, you just gotta fight through em til the caring for yourself, becomes more than the caring for her. Hope this put things in perspective for you. -Shreder

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Happy Hunting Comrades! -Shreder