Girlfriend has double standards... advice?



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PostPosted: Sun Oct 01, 2017 8:49 pm 
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I don't see how carrying a firearm is relevant. Oh... You're username implies you're in the UK. You can't carry a gun :lol:
Not that I'd want to. Not sure what relevance it has to your relationship situation, let alone why it would be followed by a "lol" emoji.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 01, 2017 10:52 pm 
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I don't see how carrying a firearm is relevant. Oh... You're username implies you're in the UK. You can't carry a gun :lol:
Not that I'd want to. Not sure what relevance it has to your relationship situation, let alone why it would be followed by a "lol" emoji.
It was in response to another user who suggested that a physical escalation may happen. It wasn't in regard to the relationship. If you'd read the entire paragraph, maybe you'd have understood that.


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 01, 2017 11:09 pm 
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I don't see how carrying a firearm is relevant. Oh... You're username implies you're in the UK. You can't carry a gun :lol:
Not that I'd want to. Not sure what relevance it has to your relationship situation, let alone why it would be followed by a "lol" emoji.
It was in response to another user who suggested that a physical escalation may happen. It wasn't in regard to the relationship. If you'd read the entire paragraph, maybe you'd have understood that.
Read it. My main point is that you'd pull out a gun on your girlfriend's friend...

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 01, 2017 11:28 pm 
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Read it. My main point is that you'd pull out a gun on your girlfriend's friend...

Well, you're obviously not very familiar with carrying a firearm and the dangers that brings. If you get in a fight with someone, and are on the ground, they're "lovestruck"/ hate your guts, and see the gun poking out of your pants, or it gets knocked out of the holster. What do you think could happen?

No way I'd pull out a weapon, unless it was a last resort sort of thing. But I'm also not going to put myself in a situation where an assailant could take my firearm away from me. That's just idiotic. :roll:


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 03, 2017 6:20 am 
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So I've been dating this girl for about 6 months. She's broken up with me probably 10 or 15 times, then immediately tries to get back together. Anyway, she's got this super chode guy friend. Who she says is her *best* friend. Buys her gifts all the time, gives her a jewelry box with a heart shaped mirror in it with a note saying he got her the "most beautiful thing in the world" that kind of shit.

I don't mind it, and don't feel threatened by it. However, this dude fucking disrespects me all the time. I've met him once, when he picked her up at my house after I fucked her. I said "What's up, dude?" and he just grunted at me. He went to her house one time, found a rubber in the floor where I'd fucked her the day before, and flipped shit, apparently. Always telling her rude shit about me, then he makes all sorts of rude comments about me. Then if she goes somewhere with him, she gets all bent out of shape because he guilt trips her about not dating him, and I'm the one that has to put up with that shit.

It's always pissed me off, but now we're running into a problem. If I attempt to hang out with any females, she loses her shit. She thinks I want to fuck them all (which isn't untrue, but I'm not going to cheat on her). I'm not going to let the double standard fly. Either she can quit hanging out with Dr. Chode (for real, chodiest dude I've ever seen), or she can just accept the fact that I'm going to hang out with these other girls.

She doesn't hang out with him as much as she used to, but it still pisses me off when shit does happen. I've brought it up before and she'll make excuses like "Well, my mom is friends with him, so I can't avoid him completely". But as I'm typing this, she's at a concert with the dude.


There are more double standards, too. She went over to one of her Ex's house while she was in town with her mom. Her mom needed some kind of Benzo or something, so they went to his house. She wound up cooking dinner for him and her mom (they both lived with him until a few months ago). Then my most recent Ex makes a FaceBook account and sends me a friend request. GF loses her shit again. "You better delete that, etc."

So in her mind, she can go cook dinner at her ex's house, but I'm not even supposed to be friends with my ex on FB. Her excuse is "Well I dated him for 5 years blah blah blah, she was just your fuck toy".

What would you guys do in these kind of situations?
Problems you, not her. Why you persist with a nut job is a rhetorical question.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 03, 2017 5:50 pm 
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So I've been dating this girl for about 6 months. She's broken up with me probably 10 or 15 times, then immediately tries to get back together. Anyway, she's got this super chode guy friend. Who she says is her *best* friend. Buys her gifts all the time, gives her a jewelry box with a heart shaped mirror in it with a note saying he got her the "most beautiful thing in the world" that kind of shit.

I don't mind it, and don't feel threatened by it. However, this dude fucking disrespects me all the time. I've met him once, when he picked her up at my house after I fucked her. I said "What's up, dude?" and he just grunted at me. He went to her house one time, found a rubber in the floor where I'd fucked her the day before, and flipped shit, apparently. Always telling her rude shit about me, then he makes all sorts of rude comments about me. Then if she goes somewhere with him, she gets all bent out of shape because he guilt trips her about not dating him, and I'm the one that has to put up with that shit.

It's always pissed me off, but now we're running into a problem. If I attempt to hang out with any females, she loses her shit. She thinks I want to fuck them all (which isn't untrue, but I'm not going to cheat on her). I'm not going to let the double standard fly. Either she can quit hanging out with Dr. Chode (for real, chodiest dude I've ever seen), or she can just accept the fact that I'm going to hang out with these other girls.

She doesn't hang out with him as much as she used to, but it still pisses me off when shit does happen. I've brought it up before and she'll make excuses like "Well, my mom is friends with him, so I can't avoid him completely". But as I'm typing this, she's at a concert with the dude.


There are more double standards, too. She went over to one of her Ex's house while she was in town with her mom. Her mom needed some kind of Benzo or something, so they went to his house. She wound up cooking dinner for him and her mom (they both lived with him until a few months ago). Then my most recent Ex makes a FaceBook account and sends me a friend request. GF loses her shit again. "You better delete that, etc."

So in her mind, she can go cook dinner at her ex's house, but I'm not even supposed to be friends with my ex on FB. Her excuse is "Well I dated him for 5 years blah blah blah, she was just your fuck toy".

What would you guys do in these kind of situations?
Problems you, not her. Why you persist with a nut job is a rhetorical question.
He likes the drama evidently. His attitude towards this and owning a firearm makes that clear. Probably watches too much TV

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 05, 2017 10:31 pm 
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So I've been dating this girl for about 6 months. She's broken up with me probably 10 or 15 times, then immediately tries to get back together. Anyway, she's got this super chode guy friend. Who she says is her *best* friend. Buys her gifts all the time, gives her a jewelry box with a heart shaped mirror in it with a note saying he got her the "most beautiful thing in the world" that kind of shit.

I don't mind it, and don't feel threatened by it. However, this dude fucking disrespects me all the time. I've met him once, when he picked her up at my house after I fucked her. I said "What's up, dude?" and he just grunted at me. He went to her house one time, found a rubber in the floor where I'd fucked her the day before, and flipped shit, apparently. Always telling her rude shit about me, then he makes all sorts of rude comments about me. Then if she goes somewhere with him, she gets all bent out of shape because he guilt trips her about not dating him, and I'm the one that has to put up with that shit.

It's always pissed me off, but now we're running into a problem. If I attempt to hang out with any females, she loses her shit. She thinks I want to fuck them all (which isn't untrue, but I'm not going to cheat on her). I'm not going to let the double standard fly. Either she can quit hanging out with Dr. Chode (for real, chodiest dude I've ever seen), or she can just accept the fact that I'm going to hang out with these other girls.

She doesn't hang out with him as much as she used to, but it still pisses me off when shit does happen. I've brought it up before and she'll make excuses like "Well, my mom is friends with him, so I can't avoid him completely". But as I'm typing this, she's at a concert with the dude.


There are more double standards, too. She went over to one of her Ex's house while she was in town with her mom. Her mom needed some kind of Benzo or something, so they went to his house. She wound up cooking dinner for him and her mom (they both lived with him until a few months ago). Then my most recent Ex makes a FaceBook account and sends me a friend request. GF loses her shit again. "You better delete that, etc."

So in her mind, she can go cook dinner at her ex's house, but I'm not even supposed to be friends with my ex on FB. Her excuse is "Well I dated him for 5 years blah blah blah, she was just your fuck toy".

What would you guys do in these kind of situations?
Problems you, not her. Why you persist with a nut job is a rhetorical question.
He likes the drama evidently. His attitude towards this and owning a firearm makes that clear. Probably watches too much TV

You guys are funny.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 06, 2017 3:27 pm 
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So I've been dating this girl for about 6 months. She's broken up with me probably 10 or 15 times, then immediately tries to get back together. Anyway, she's got this super chode guy friend. Who she says is her *best* friend. Buys her gifts all the time, gives her a jewelry box with a heart shaped mirror in it with a note saying he got her the "most beautiful thing in the world" that kind of shit.

I don't mind it, and don't feel threatened by it. However, this dude fucking disrespects me all the time. I've met him once, when he picked her up at my house after I fucked her. I said "What's up, dude?" and he just grunted at me. He went to her house one time, found a rubber in the floor where I'd fucked her the day before, and flipped shit, apparently. Always telling her rude shit about me, then he makes all sorts of rude comments about me. Then if she goes somewhere with him, she gets all bent out of shape because he guilt trips her about not dating him, and I'm the one that has to put up with that shit.

It's always pissed me off, but now we're running into a problem. If I attempt to hang out with any females, she loses her shit. She thinks I want to fuck them all (which isn't untrue, but I'm not going to cheat on her). I'm not going to let the double standard fly. Either she can quit hanging out with Dr. Chode (for real, chodiest dude I've ever seen), or she can just accept the fact that I'm going to hang out with these other girls.

She doesn't hang out with him as much as she used to, but it still pisses me off when shit does happen. I've brought it up before and she'll make excuses like "Well, my mom is friends with him, so I can't avoid him completely". But as I'm typing this, she's at a concert with the dude.


There are more double standards, too. She went over to one of her Ex's house while she was in town with her mom. Her mom needed some kind of Benzo or something, so they went to his house. She wound up cooking dinner for him and her mom (they both lived with him until a few months ago). Then my most recent Ex makes a FaceBook account and sends me a friend request. GF loses her shit again. "You better delete that, etc."

So in her mind, she can go cook dinner at her ex's house, but I'm not even supposed to be friends with my ex on FB. Her excuse is "Well I dated him for 5 years blah blah blah, she was just your fuck toy".

What would you guys do in these kind of situations?
If what you're saying is actually happening and not just your assuming then maybe its time to rethink the relationship.

From how you describe things I assume she's relaying this to you. I would take issue if my partner was knowingly hanging out with someone who likes her. The friendships a farce and my I may have no issue with her worrying about cheating but my need for respect (her tolerating a friend talking smack about me and the relationship), not to mention it demonstrates someone who demonstrates low integrity. Your relationship sounds like a malignant tumour.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 09, 2017 7:20 am 
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OP this woman broke up with you 15 times. How is that not an issue?

You honestly think that kind of impulsive behavior qualifies as relationship material?

Either way, the issue is not the dude. The issue is her. She likes the attention. It's not your job to deal with her friend that's actively trying to sabotage your relationship.

He's shittalking her boyfriend to her face, which is you. If she doesn't cut that short it because she doesn't hold this relationship in high enough regard.

That's all you need to know.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 15, 2017 3:43 am 
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OP this woman broke up with you 15 times. How is that not an issue?

You honestly think that kind of impulsive behavior qualifies as relationship material?

Either way, the issue is not the dude. The issue is her. She likes the attention. It's not your job to deal with her friend that's actively trying to sabotage your relationship.

He's shittalking her boyfriend to her face, which is you. If she doesn't cut that short it because she doesn't hold this relationship in high enough regard.

That's all you need to know.

I know. I guess I had just gotten comfortable with her. She broke up with me again yesterday, because I wouldn't allow her to cross a boundary we had mutually agreed upon. I remembered all the stuff you guys said, and knew I had to put a stop to it. So I hit up a girl I'd fucked about a year and a half ago, brought her over last night, and fucked her. I figured that would keep me from going back to her. I told her about it, today when she was texting me and calling me and she lost her shit again. Which I knew she would. I figure if my will power wasn't strong enough, that would kind of fuck things over with her for good. She told me to never contact her again.

Thanks for your input, everyone. Pretty down about it all, because I feel like I really loved this girl, even though she was crazy as fuck. But I guess I'll move on to bigger and better things. Anyone got a good read for getting over a breakup? lol


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 16, 2017 2:39 am 
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OP this woman broke up with you 15 times. How is that not an issue?

You honestly think that kind of impulsive behavior qualifies as relationship material?

Either way, the issue is not the dude. The issue is her. She likes the attention. It's not your job to deal with her friend that's actively trying to sabotage your relationship.

He's shittalking her boyfriend to her face, which is you. If she doesn't cut that short it because she doesn't hold this relationship in high enough regard.

That's all you need to know.

I know. I guess I had just gotten comfortable with her. She broke up with me again yesterday, because I wouldn't allow her to cross a boundary we had mutually agreed upon. I remembered all the stuff you guys said, and knew I had to put a stop to it. So I hit up a girl I'd fucked about a year and a half ago, brought her over last night, and fucked her. I figured that would keep me from going back to her. I told her about it, today when she was texting me and calling me and she lost her shit again. Which I knew she would. I figure if my will power wasn't strong enough, that would kind of fuck things over with her for good. She told me to never contact her again.

Thanks for your input, everyone. Pretty down about it all, because I feel like I really loved this girl, even though she was crazy as fuck. But I guess I'll move on to bigger and better things. Anyone got a good read for getting over a breakup? lol
All of your behaviour comes out of neediness. You're both in a very egoic, toxic tail spin. She pushes, you pull; you pull, she pushes. This relationship has become abusive. Your power never rests with having control over/seeking to manipulate another person into staying in a relationship. All that does is perpetuate fear and a lopsided dynamic.

You're failing to see the forest for the trees and are therefore bound to keep repeating your mistakes.


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