Hey Cupid,

Personally, pickup should not be your primary goal/focus. I agree with everything that Neo says - you're a young guy, who already has some issues with normal social interactions. Don't focus too much on PU or else it will simply get to your head - focus on getting to NORMAL.

You need to learn social intuition - you say in your response that there was "nothing you could have done". You're absolutely wrong - nothing is wrong with approaching, but you really should have toned down your approach in this instance. In every case the "direct approach" is NOT the best way to approach, and you've really got to learn how to READ the situation and adapt your material to make it more relatable to that specific set.

Currently watching your 12 girls approached by pickup-artist in Puerto Rico video. A few things stand out here:

1. You've definitely improved over the past few months, you're integrating a bit more life into your tonality and routines. These are very good things.


You need to work on

1. Building a RELATABLE conversation. The conversations should make sense and not be too jumpy/out of left field. For example the "plastic surgery" comment and theme. Also, you have bad transitioning from directions to then telling a girl that she's cute. There's little context.
2. Creating comfort - A number of these girls are NOT comfortable with you. They get weirded out and leave quickly. Quite possibly because you still need to work on having relatable conversations that aren't too weird
3. Over-complimenting - Complimenting is only gonna work if it comes from a non-needy place. I don't think the girls are of the same opinion. Personally, I would stay away from using complimentary openers UNTIL they can be executed properly
4. INSULTING - You throw quite a few insults and I'm not even sure you realise. Particularly in the first set with the "wearing lots of makeup". You really need to work on your conversation skills because it has the potential to push women away

Watch a lot of infield video by really good guys. A LOT. Then, copy, pick up what works, and trash what doesn't.

Hey Cupid. I'd like to see you not talk so much in your approaches. In one of your early videos you talked about the 'Golden Ratio' where the goal is to get the woman doing most of the talking. I think you should try keeping this in mind more.

In my approaches I just like to directly ask questions, like as follows:

- What's your favorite color?
- What's your favorite fruit?
- Do you have any brothers and sisters?
- Are you the youngest or oldest in the family?
- What are you studying / doing for a living? (you tend to always ask that, but you sometimes try to guess first or say that 'artistic vibe' line)
- What do you like to do for fun? (I notice Luis asks that)
- Do you cook? (Another Luis one)

Basically ask anything you want to find out about the girl and try to get a conversation going that way.

I haven't seen a lot of Luis's approaches but he seems to have more of a grasp at this than you do. What you tend to do is waffle on a bit in the hope your target doesn't go away. And sometimes you say some weird things and consequently the target ejects.

Don't get me wrong though, you have a good sense of humor which is important, but in some of your interactions you just keep chattering and the target doesn't really get a chance to say much.

I've found it best not to talk much about myself. In the past for some reason I would get onto the topic of my addictions and waffle on about personal problems with women. This does not setup a sexual vibe! You have to keep the conversation on track and not get too in depth about anything that would make you forget about having sex with the target.

With prostitutes I have no trouble keeping my dick hard but if for some reason we get chatting instead of having sex I get surprised that my dick goes limp pretty quickly with the concentration I'm putting into chatting. Now I'm not saying you should be maintaining a boner whilst you're trying to pick up a chick but you should be keeping in mind the objective.

So, don't get too in-depth with conversation. Keep it light and get to know the woman so you can decide whether you would like to spend some time with her or not. Once comfort is built a bit then you can try to steer the conversation to sexual stuff (like asking if she has orgasms, what's her favourite position etc.) and/or you can say "you know, we've been talking for a while now and I'm trying to figure out how to get into bed with you."

I've watched most of your videos as light entertainment and to see how you're doing. What I'd really like to see you do though is try minimizing the fluff, being more direct and approaching the interaction like you're an interviewer rather a chatterbox.

I'd really like to make my own recordings and post them on youtube for you to watch and see the style I'm talking about. Unfortunately, I don't have any secret video equipment at the moment plus I have pretty bad approach anxiety in day game. I might try to make some audio recordings soon.

I really do have to take my hat off to you for doing so many approaches! It is inspiring. I went out to the mall last Saturday to see if I could do anything and I didn't do one single approach. So keep up the good work man!

Cheers.

Pictures of Girls that I approached in Puerto Rico

DAY 1, 3:51 PM 6/12/2015, FRIDAY

Ok I'm FINALLY back home, after a long trip to Puero Rico to pickup girls. Was this trip worth it even though it took a massive bite out of my wallet (approx. $250) and 2 weeks of my life? I don't know and I don't want to spend the next hour debating a worthless discussion but "Jerdo" on FB made a good point: There's plenty of beautiful women here in NYC so going to somewhere else may have not been worth it.


On the other hand, going on this trip helped launch me out of my comfort zone as well as broadened my perspective on life and gave a few profound realizations:

(1) I thought that once I get out of the prison called "living with my parents" then I will finally seize my full potential. I thought that my old environment was holding me back, and I would magically transform into a BEAST when I would go out of the state but I was wrong. Who you are, follows you everywhere. Travel isn't a magic pill to life-transformation because your personality and habits are chained to your body.

(2) Seeing Luis' personality was inspiring. Sure he gets a lot of hate for having narcissistic tenancies (which ironically helps him get women - since his delusional high sense of confidence is intoxicatingly attractive to women. for more info: google "dark triad" traits), lacking social calibration and sometimes accidentally doing kino without the girl's consent. HOWEVER, he also has more guts than anyone I have ever seen firsthand. While I stand there paralyzed in fear, he MASS approaches again and again - exploiting the numbers game. As well as pulling and number closing right infront of me. It's a sight that's hard to believe until you experience it first hand and will leave you in a state of shock and denial. He's also highly enthusiastic and positive while infield, and taking incredible initiative out of field - the importance of which cannot be underestimated. There is no doubt that there is massive potential within him.

(3) Perhaps the most important realization was that I've been living a lie. I was telling myself that I was doing 100% of what I could be doing to improve but now I see it was all a deception I used to allow myself to get away with being lazy. The truth is that I've been doing only a fraction of what I could be doing every day. Been too easy on myself. And I will never get far with this kind of mentality.

After I got home, I thought about quitting the game for religious reasons and even attempted to do so. I have to return to G-d and stop sinning with women. However, when I dropped doing everything pickup-related I lost all motivation in life and sunk back into an endless cycle of watching movies and videogames. A dark place I vowed I would never return to. The truth is, that I'm too deep in the game to radically quit like this without expecting consequences.

I like to believe that I Always Have a Choice. but that's only true for those who have an empowering personality. Unlike me, I believe that I am weak in Spirit, Mind and Body. And that's why my greatest priority right now is to work on my inner-game and make Self-Development the highest priority. Even higher than pickup.

In the meantime, I have no choice but to keep doing pickup because it's what's going to get me through college. College is going to be a hell lot of work - especially since I am taking 6 classes at once and have to achieve a high gpa (so I can get into an internship program). But without an end in sight, I am like a car that lacks gasoline. A tunnel with no light in the end causes desperation and loss of hope. I need a vision to look forward to, to keep me happy. And that's pickup - so I'll keep doing pickup for at least another semester.

I really hope that I can finally get my life together and live the life I've always dreamed of. But every time that I succeed for a while, I always drop back into an old cycle of bad habits. This is very discouraging to be fighting the same battle over and over for seemingly forever. But I can't give up - not when I am so close to victory. The situation is very different this time around because the stakes are higher than ever. My entire career and future depends on it. I have to get good grades in all my college classes or settle for minimum wage all my life.

I'm going to end this FR with a few rules that I will do everything within my power to keep.
(1) Alternate between spending 2 hours a day on personal reflection on how to improve my own game and playing game on online-dating sites.
(2) Continue to keep a diary every day - recording progress made, lessons learned, current struggles with their proposed solutions.
(3) At all costs, do not engage in any time-wasters such as movies or videogames. Albeit, documentaries are allowed since they're educational.
(4) Start the day with guided meditation, blasting music and working out.

Let's do this.

x

Hey cupid, I'm glad to see you've established yourself an internet presence and you have people rooting for you.

Have you gotten laid yet? If not w.e. it's cool.

It's hard to watch your videos... Why is it so hard to watch you talk to women? Is it hard when you're talking to them or is everything just flowing out and you don't have a filter on your mouth?

Where are you going with all of this? Are you doing PU just to make videos of talking unsuccessfully with girls, or do you have like actual goal in mind for women?

_________________
"Keep your head up in the sky, you just a baby."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HccL8jUIIWU - Adoration of the Magi Lupe Fiasco

I just wanna quote this:

"I thought that once I get out of the prison called "living with my parents" then I will finally seize my full potential. I thought that my old environment was holding me back, and I would magically transform into a BEAST when I would go out of the state but I was wrong. Who you are, follows you everywhere. Travel isn't a magic pill to life-transformation because your personality and habits are chained to your body."

This is actually a great point. I wish there was more people in my life who understood this.

Back when I was a teenager working at a Grocery Store, one of my co-workers used to say this to me all the time "No matter where you go. There you are when you get there."

I used to laugh at that because it was so stupid. I didn't fully grasp what he meant by that until further on in my life when a lot of unhappy people I know left a lot of good people, great things behind, to move away in order to fix the problems that are transfixed inside of them.

No matter where you go. There you are when you get there.

Real change is a painful, unpleasant experience that takes place over a period of time where you put in conscious day-to-day efforts. Simply changing your environment won't change fundamental issues inside of a person.

I've noticed that a lot of the things that I haven't understood in my youth, I am beginning to understand now. Wisdom really does come with age.
That's a deep fundamental truth. To be able to grow at a rapid pace requires endurance to pain and discomfort. They say "Life begins at the end of your comfort zone." which means that you have to thrive in your non-comfort zone. Love living life on the edge.

Thanks. I'll need to focus on specific details on how I improved so I can feel a surge of motivation coming from seeing my own progress.

Smooth transitions make the conversation seem more natural and less forced. However, they are harder to perform. I'll have to start using phrases like "That reminds me...", "That's just like when..."

I should really take Da's advice and focus on building a commonality.
Yes I know but surprisingly it works though. I have to admit, that I don't understand why though because I've always had the suspicion that the girl realizes that the directions was a ruse. However, I've found that to be more effective at getting the girl to stay than by making an observation about her clothes or anything else to which she responds with a simple "Thank you..." and leaves. So this is a way of adding greater social pressure for her to say - as well obligating her.

For example:

"You have a creative look. Are you into the arts?"
"No, I'm not bye..."

"I just noticed. You're actually really cute..."
*girl is stunned and continues to stay in the interaction which buys time* "Umm.... okay? Thanks I guess."
Can you give an example of this happening?

I say absurd crazy things to keep the conversation entertaining and prevent the set from leaving out of boredom. But sometimes I make the mistake of doing it to a girl that is non-social and is too intimidated by my comments. I really have to start being able to read the girl right away: is she comfortable enough to handle my absurd humorous remarks or should I play it safe with normal boring conversation?
You would have to point a concrete example for me to be able to take this into context. I mean I agree with what your saying but I don't recall ever making this mistake.

The negs are there to create attraction and make the girl feel comfortable by lowering up the interest levels - thereby decreasing the tension. By mistake however, is not immediately distracting the girl with a different topic of conversation. Negs have to be THROW and GO. Not LINGER and wait for her to RAGE BACK.
Thanks for your outer-game advice. You're actually the only guy who has done that in like forever. I'll try to implement.

Yes thanks for the reminder but it's hard to get the girl to talk. When I pause in the conversation, she often will just leave with an excuse like "Well nice meeting you." And I'm done. It would get easier after the hookpoint, but it's hard to get to that point and to know when you're in the hookpoint or not. The other option is to ask her questions but I've found that it often leads to the girl only giving a few worded responses. So although the Golden ratio is ideal, it's hard to execute successfully.

Haha Luis does ask that question a lot. I can tell you've been watching the infields

In regards to that list of questions: they are good questions to build rapport with but bad questions for generating attraction because they are inherently boring in nature and she's heard them x1000 of times before. The girl will only bother answering these questions in detail and building commonalities with you after you've got her to like you. Attraction must come before comfort. Until that phase, it's better to ask questions that would really cause her have fun and enjoy the interaction (hence Invest) like:

"If you won the lottery and you could do anything in the world, what would you do?"

Furthermore, simply asking these questions would demonstrate too much interest in her before she has earned it by proving her worth to you (hence the qualification phase). Refer to M3 Module.

Like Mystery says look for 3 signs of IOIs.

As for weird things causing the girl to eject, you would have to point out a concrete example for me to judge this based on the context. On your second point, I do admit that to be a fault of mine but a lot of the times I keep talking - out of fear - that if I stop, she'll excuse herself and leave.
Hence the seduction community's standard advice of keeping the conversation light and fun. Not too serious because that would come of as needy.

Thanks for the support dude. I will go more direct as soon as I get the girl to qualify herself to me and prove her worth to me. Otherwise, it would lower my value too much.

I'll try qualifiers like "If you were in a room with 10000 of girls that looked just like you - how would you stand out?" To get her to fight for my approval, and then I will reward her by being more direct.

Really really really quick update.

I haven't been getting much success with daygame and even the success that I have gotten pales in comparison with what I've gotten from onlinegame. The bottom line is that my onlinegame is vastly superior to my daygame. Online I've gotten dozens of numbers, sexting and tons of SPAM dates. I've even gotten a few female friends. My main sticking point online however, is that as soon as a girl likes me - I back off and stop talking to her. For daygame I am ashamed to admit that I have gotten zero results - besides the adrenaline rush and some fame. Why keep doing something that doesn't work?

For the most part, I'm going to quit daygame and just do it casually. But my primary focus is going to be onlinegame.

In other news, I've looked up on traffic sources on my videos and have been able to identify some hate threads about me. Feel free to look at them but beware: MAJOR HATE. These have been posted without my permission.

(Will post links later).

EDIT: UPDATE

I just took a walk outside to clear my head and re-evaluate life goals. If my goal is to get girls then I've been doing it about the wrong way. Online-game has worked for me before to get girls, so why did I ruin a good thing and switch to daygame? From now on I will attempt to invest a minimum of 2 - 3 hours a day into online dating sites to get maximum results.

GOAL: Get a girlfriend who will sext.

Right now it's 948PM. I'll spend the next 2 hours hitting up online-dating sites and then will post my results back on this forum.

http://www.simplepickup.com/forum/off-t ... layer.html


I dont get it...You get more feedback that is pretty consistent across the board, to change certain things...yet you ignore all of it....

I Followed the link and it appears he was banned. You should message that girl who has your user account in her sig and tell her you gave up daygaming.

_________________
"Keep your head up in the sky, you just a baby."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HccL8jUIIWU - Adoration of the Magi Lupe Fiasco

Mmm, yes, I understand what you mean. But that could be because most often the girl was busy, or didn't feel like chatting, or wasn't comfortable enough yet to open up to a greater degree.

I would just be patient and keep asking questions. If she tends to remain as a closed book and you find it difficult talking to her then you can try telling her that. Mmm, so far you haven't opened up to me much yet.. You can also do the same sort of thing if you run out of things to ask or say. Just say Hmm, I'm not sure what to say now.

If you still get nowhere then eject and move on to the next one who might be more talkative. Or you can try your luck and escalate.


The problem here is that your worrying about what she's thinking. That's breaking rule number one of the system I like to follow.

If she finds the questions boring, well then that's too bad for her - move on to the next one.

You're not approaching women to entertain them. You're approaching them because they attracted you. The questions you ask are to get an idea of who you are talking to and whether you like them or not. Don't worry if they like you or not. That's up to them to ascertain. If they ask you a question then answer honestly. If you don't want to reveal certain information about yourself then tell her, I'd rather not answer that question or you can put the pressure on her - Why did you ask that?.

Having said all that, I do however agree that asking those sort of generic questions can be boring. That's why I can't be bothered with pick up sometimes because it can feel tedious. But I don't think there's really any other way to building comfort. You have to do it if you want the pussy man.
Mmm, well you can ask that question if you want. But it's not really a question she can answer promptly if she has not really thought about it before. It's fine to ask something like that if you're genuinely curious I guess but it's too thought provoking in my opinion. You want questions that can get her babbling straight away like boom, boom, boom.

Putting that question aside though, I would disagree attraction must come before comfort. Well for her anyway. For yourself attraction came first otherwise you wouldn't have approached her in the first place!

Again, don't worry about getting her to be attracted to you. That's for her to decide.
Nope, the questions are to ascertain whether you like her or not. The system I follow doesn't worry about qualification or value or worth or things like that.
Mmm, well, one that sticks in my mind is the approach you did in the bookstore where you pointed to the SPAM stuff. I can't remember what you were talking about at the end of the interaction (I'd have to watch the video again) but you were rambling on about something and she just left without so much as a goodbye from what I remember. She seemed friendly enough earlier on in the interaction.
Again, you're not there to entertain them. Make a light joke or two - that's fine. But your primary role is to be the interviewer I reckon. If they take an interest in you and ask questions, great. Just remember to not drift off into lengthy diatribe land.

Don't try to focus on keeping the woman within your grasp. Just relax and if she leaves then fine - move on to the next one.
Well, you obviously follow a different system than I follow. That's the problem with this pick up stuff. There's so many systems and methods and things and so we're on these forums giving advice from all sorts of different backgrounds that when meshed together probably don't work at all.

I try to stick to only one system which is David X's. He has only has two rules:

1. Who cares what she thinks or says.
2. You're the most important person in the relationship.

I'd really like you to try out dropping all the Mystery Method stuff and go with the sort of thing I'm trying to describe as I would really like to see the change in your game compared to usual.
Again, this is something I would disagree with man. You don't want her to fight for your approval. You don't want to be playing games with her.

If you like her, bone her. That's all you've got to worry about.

Anyway, good luck. Hope to see some more good day game videos at some point.

@Dirk thanks for your feedback and i'll read/respond shortly. In the meantime, this is my FR from last night:

Good morning world.

Yesterday I spent 3 hours hitting up onlinegame and If I don't record some of the lessons learned while they are still fresh in my mind then I will miss out on the experience. I will also record snippets of conversation that seemed to have work very well so as to continue to use them in the future. As for results, there were none - except one sexual photo and an *almost* number close. However, doing online-dating yesterday has helped me get back into the swing of things and has performed miracles on my moral - lifting my spirits and getting me back in the game.

I'll begin with addressing three of my primary inner-game concerns with online-game. I believe these are some of my greatest sticking points and overcoming any one of these would boost my skills past 300%. After all smooth inner-game, leads to having smoother outer-game.

Primary Inner Game Concerns:
(1) There have been many times when girls have expressed great interest in being with me and have exchanged numbers - however, I never followed up. For some reason when she starts to genuinely like me, I freak out and abandon ship. By far, I would have to say that this is the number one reason why I have not succeeded with girls in general. Because as soon as a girl likes me, I just run off - never to be seen or heard of again. I usually rationalize this as "being too busy with more important things".

The way that I'll have to overcome this is to make a firm commitment to do online-game every single night no matter what. BACK DOWN FOR NOTHING. The most important thing here is to establish a habit.

Another excuse which I've been telling myself was the concept of Lockdown. Lockdown was when I told myself "I'm going to warm up on other girls first and then pursue the one that is most interested in me" but then I would never end up going on the target. The alternate version of Lockdown was where I say "This girl is special and I don't want to risk losing her. Let me practice on other girls FIRST and then when I get good (after a few months) then I'll get back to her and she'll certainly fall in love with me." (The alternate version of Lockdown has already caused me to lose 2 close female friends). From now on, NO MORE LOCKDOWN!

Time is running short here so I'll have to concise from now on...'

(2) Seeing pickup as a painful chore. This causes me to want to avoid playing the game and resort to other hobbies such as wasting my life on movies and etc. My top priority needs to be to ENJOY talking to girls so that way I can substitute it as a mainstream hobby that I use for relaxation.

(3) Allowing myself to game girls, late into the night. This disrupts my sleep schedule. Additionally being on the computer at 2am in the morning makes me feel like shit and often leads to me wasting away my life watching movies. Simply put, I am vulnerable at night and that's why the night should be for sleeping - not staying up on my PC. No matter how cute the girl is or how close I am to getting her, it's IMPERATIVE that I don't stay up too late. Use common sense.

GAME LESSONS:

As much as possible you want the situation to look like the girl is the one who is chasing after you, instead of the other way around. The one who is pursuing is the one who is lower value. And to create attraction you have to create the perception that you are higher value than her (without pissing her off) in the process. Here's one way of doing this: As soon as you can tell the girl likes you, DROP the conversation and have re-initiate it. I've done this successfully by simply saying "haha" in my text and then she'll jump in and try to save the conversation with a question or some other stupid statement. In which case, you allow yourself to be drawn back in and have successfully created the illusion that she's the one who is chasing you (instead of the other way around). In the case where she asks you a question, don't give her a direct answer but play around with it first - so as not to give your power away.

Here are some other things that I learned:

Play hard to get but don't be impossible to catch. If you're too hard to get, she'll give up out of frustration or boredom. Be "catchable".

Compliments should never come from a place of neediness or supplication but from feelings of genuine appreciation and gratitude.

If you're too easily available then the girl will think "He has no life and nothing going on." Be BUSY at times and reject calls/texts.

Ignore what she says she wants in a guy because it's usually nice-guy qualities. Instead pay attention to what she RESPONDS to (bad-boy).

Be a flame that spreads its warmth to all in proximity. Evoke positive emotions all around you. Feel good & make others feel good as well.

With every girl that you encounter, take things as far as they go - for maximum practice. Don't back down until it's clear that it's OVER.

Only bother looking at her online-dating profile, AFTER she has responded to your message. Time savors like this make for efficient game.

Pickup shouldn't be stressful or nerve-wrecking for you or the girl will get creeped out by your vibe. Focus on ENJOYING yourself w/ her

Don't be blind. Take note of important insights that occur to you while you're infield to expand your player wisdom. KNOWLEDGE IS SEX.

Ensure that you talk to girls every single damn day - so as to keep your skills sharp and ready. Don't lose your mojo by growing rusty.

I don't really care if I get the girl or not. Even if I lose, I still win by gaining practice, experience, lessons & fun by approaching her