Hello,
Site admins and everyone else
I'm from Florida, USA.
I'am 41 years old.
Finalizing a divorce currently so am getting into the game..
Pickup is something I have been studying for a few years now..been scouring the internet for help and finally found this site.
Pickup lines I like to use...well haven't really begun this whole thing yet..hence why I'm here.
Like eating healthy, working out, video games, tennis but haven't played in ages, gun range, movies, local pubs, clubs.
As for passion : its women ..I think about and focus on them like all the time.
Goals : There are 2 important ones : first is find a female who is attractive and compatible with my elevated sex drive and things I like to do in that nature. Second one is the road to financial freedom where I can work for myself.

Brief history. the short version. Been married for 10 years to a woman 16 years older than me. Everything started fine and went well. But as years passed the age factor started to show its face. Like she didn't want to do much of anything anymore except sit around and watch t.v. I would then submerge myself into another room video gaming. We would do our own things most of the time. Sex once and awhile then at one point she told me she wasn't happy and said I need to find sex somewhere else because it wasn't important to her anymore..Once again the age gaps ugly face appeared. So I slightly tried to enter the game as you put it and started looking at dating sites and such. And researching how to meet females when your out at stores and other places. Not really much happened because I'm such a greenhorn at all this. Being married for 10 years kinda domesticates you. At some point I started to think I didn't want to be regretting things later in life. I realized I wasn't living submerged in video games , no sex, but wanting it all the time, not going anywhere or doing much and something had to change. So talks emerged and I pushed for a divorce. After much emotion n such we both agreed and we are now finalizing our divorce. Still friends but I'm moving on and need to figure out this whole game.

So tonight in my searches I ran across this site and hope it can help me get my ass out there meeting some females and doing some fun stuff with them among other things.

Thanks to everyone for listening or as it may be reading I look forward to learning much from here and becoming the Jedi with women I had always hoped to be

Off the market for ten years? Man... I am glad you tried to marry a woman and make it work for so long, despite differences and rifts. Plus, looking for help shows, especially after so long off the market, courage. This is hard my friend.

You lost something when being married. Those are social skills. I do not know how you were before, but your social muscles decay. I myself am in a LTR and see a marketable difference. Going out and helping students is insanely hard. I have some quick fixes for getting yourself into social mode, but I am not sure you have the skill set left to do well with them.

The first thing you need to do is just go out and socialize. When you settle down, your social life and friends change. You need to re-learn how to communicate with people in general. I view Game as advanced social skills, nothing more.

Before you jump head first into techniques, go out and begin to talk to people. Anyone and everyone. A lot of Pick Up is meeting new people. You add the pressure of trying to Seduce a woman and you will be stunted in field. Start small and work your way up. It seems daunting, but simply going out for drinks with a buddy and chatting to the bartender will vastly help you.

This forum is full of guys with unique perspectives. I do not read a lot on here that I disagree with, which is saying something. Not many sites have the unique ability to sport guys who specialize in many types of Game from Natural, do dance floor, to Introvert Game. Someone here has been where you are and can help.

Good luck.

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Check out our website to get a FREE eBook on how to get good with women plus loads of FREE information on how to meet and Seduce women!

JUST ENJOY LIFE AND THE NEW ADVENTURE YOUR GOING TO GO ON.

you've been out for a while take it easy. hit your local bar chat to the bar staff become a regular face which will display your value to everyone else and boom you'll socialise no problem.

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You can fail all your life but still achieve more than those who did not try.

I was in your same situation before getting divorced. Only difference that i used to do natural game before getting married and having kids.

You will pick it up again quick. its like riding a bike. once you learn you can do it again. Also don't get oneitis on the first piece of ass you get. It will surely happen but learn from me and don't do it. learn what oneitis is.

You see you been out if game for so long you will get extremely attached to the first pussy you get and more than likely will become real needy because of all the female attention you are getting from her. Just remember she is not your wife.

Thanks for the responses ! And thanks for the great advice! I think the socializing is spot on..cuz I do feel rusty with my social skills. I see what you mean by the oneitis thing. Not that its happened but I was chatting this girl up online and I felt things like what your are describing because of the attention she was giving me. Now she's not chatting me up anymore I think she saw my ummm needyness thing and it pushed her away. And this was only online chatting..lol

I did have a question though..which actually brought me to this site. I live at apartment complex with a pool and am sure this question is brought up quite a bit. I always see these hot woman out there tanning of course. I have never been up to the pool to hang out up there or even swim because of the marriage situation. Now I'm wondering is there a technique for socializing up there? This may be only for the advanced considering this feels slightly intimidating. But I believe the intimidation comes from not knowing what to do.

any help is thoroughly appreciated,

thanks

Not atall for advanced. Its just about confidence. Take your towel up get your swimming shorts on jump in have a swim smile anyone smiles back just say 'Hi how you doing?' nothing over the top just be a confident guy and let them come to you dont try approaching them all etc... thats what i would do anyways due to it being your home you dont want to creep people out by coming on to strong to everyone so again just be sociable

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You can fail all your life but still achieve more than those who did not try.

Not advanced, just don't over think it. You can't be nervous. If you don't think you can pull that off, I'd suggest approaching women elsewhere. You don't want women in your apartment building talking to other women telling them that you are the awkward guy that approached them at the pool. If you talk to a few women out at a bar or a pub or coffee place and everything is smooth, then I'd go for it.

There's alot of opinions on how to do it of course, but in general for me, if a girl is tanning, eyes closed relaxing, I don't like to bother her. I wait for her to either apply lotion, read a book, get something out of her bag. I don't want her to associate me with bothering her. Easiest thing to do is something simple. Walk by when she's actually looking around or doing something and say "hey, nice day right? I don't think we've met, I'm blank" and begin from there. Continue with small talk, and if you find anything that you have in common, focus on it. If I find a girl that digs wine, craft beer, sports, anything, i use it as a way to set up another meeting, or a reason to continue the conversation. "uh oh, I can't tell you how many women I've met that say they love football but they can't even watch til half time. You aren't one of those liars are you?... there's a nice sports bar called blank, good drinks, it's a fun quirky little place, we should hang out there for the next big game. Give me your number and we'll set it up." If you chat it up with her like this with a genuine smile, use a little bit of teasing, have fun with it, it works extremely well.

Why does that little thing I just said to her work? Because it's not what just any usual guy would say. A typical dude would be so nervous talking to a cute girl that he would never dare ask her, even jokingly, if she was lying. He wouldn't phrase everything the way I did, where the girl is actually put on the spot where she is going to feel like she has to live up to my expectations, and persuade me that she's cool. Most guys would instead be trying to think of ways to show how they are cool enough for her. And I'm also, while not bragging about it, un-apologetically mentioning that I meet alot of girls and have pre-selection. That I'm man enough to be able to figure out what kind of woman I want and not lower my standards. These are all subtle, small things, but they tilt the entire conversation to where you want it. Also, I'm bringing the fun into the conversation. I'm teasing, im making her smile.

Thanks for the replies. Definitely helpful information. Will have to give some of that a try.
My self confidence is weak though. I once had superior self confidence and somehow lost it. Any tips on how to boost this up since woman can sense this weakness. And woman are ultimately turned off by a man with weak self confidence There must be a way to strengthen it

I must say the advice about why what you said works is interesting. I have heard this before and seen it on other sites on how to pickup a girl that's working cashier or waitressing. Something about saying something out of the normal shit any other guy would say can be the ticket.

And also the creeping her out thing you both touched on..that makes sense.

So thanks again.. I got lots of work to do..lol