Whats up everyone? My name is Brandon, I am 20 years old and currently live in a college town, Hammond, Louisiana. I recently decided that my pathetic one ex-girlfriend wasn't cutting it. I am shy and nervous around girls. They intimidate me to a level I can't believe. It isn't like I curl into a ball and cry if they speak to me, it is just that no matter what clever thing I thought to open with as soon as I get the chance my mind goes blank and I psych myself out. I am currently halfway through reading The Game by Neil Strauss. It is eye-opening,but I guess I expected more of guidelines and help then a really good story. So far it has helped me reach a more confident level but just not enough.
I work in a bar currently but am a kitchen manager so I don't get a huge amount of time to practice social skills everyday and it also limits my nights to go out looking for girls. This isn;t my career path, just a way to make money right now. I want to be a stand-up comedian and I come here not just seeking advice on picking up girls (although that would be a plus as well ) but instead to try to gain confidence in every aspect so I can pursue what I really want.. I am an out of shape guy, 6 foot 280 lbs with way too much of it being fat. Im working on fixing that. I work out 2-3 times a week currently and plan to move it to 5 in the coming weeks, just tough with time constraints of work, long nights, days, 60-70 hour weeks.
Anyway let me wrap this post by saying that I would love any information I could get to help me further myself. In detail, since I will finish The Game in the next day or so, what do you propose next on my quest to seduce ALL THE WOMEN? Haha. Im excited to get involved in this community and form a bond with my fellow brothers. We are all in this for the same purpose

Damn dude... first off you have your priorities straight. Knowing this automatically boosts you up to the next level of confidence. I understand you have time constraints, but finish that book. It portrays the ups and downs throughout a man's mentality and what he endures through this transformation. Once you've read it, compare his style to a style you want. Find yourself first. You said you're scared to talk to girls, ask yourself why.

I'm going to judge as well. It sounds like you're lifestyle is extremely busy, and dull as well. You may be thinking that having sex with all these women will make it more enjoyable... it could, but for what, 20,30 minutes? I'd find something that makes you happy, genuinely happy. Once you're happy on the inside I shit you not this journey of an art will become much more easier.

You say you're out of shape. Is it possible to become a legend and not a background character and wake up before the sun, and take a jog?

Ps. Those girls you see at the bar at night are harder to catch than girls during the day. Don't want walls? Get up early for coffee and ask a random lady that catches your eye what her favorite drink is. Say "I'm trusting you now" with smile. Once you get it, let her take the first sip since it's her favorite, then you take a sip. Guess what, you guys just built a solid connection within 5 minutes, no alcohol or nighttime required. Honestly, all the text here just shortens the time it would take to find out yourself. Even so, you will eventually have to find out yourself anyway. Someone said if you feign confidence enough, it becomes real. Pretend like this shit is natural to you, and go out and talk to females.

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Seeking advice from someone doesn't mean you have admitted defeat. It means you have acknowledged their superiority, and with their guidance, you will become more superior as well.

Thanks man, I appreciate that advice. I have since finished the book and am continuing to carry myself with more confidence. I'm finding very quickly that being confident, whether you are smooth or stylish or always say the right thing, is way more important.. It is difficult for me to look at my life and instead of just living in it as I have in the past to own it and make it mine. I need to create my own reality and let the rest of life fit into it. I have begun at least saying hello and smiling at girls I see in public. It seems pathetic to even write that like it is some big improvement but I have to start somewhere. This won't be an overnight journey for me but I feel if I stick to it and keep trying to improve, that I can become the man I wish to be

You're going to be a master at this. Check this out. You're willing to admit you have flaws and you're willing to improve. That's the first step, and you're taking that bull by the horns. Saying hello and smiling to girls is a good start, while maintaining strong/seductive/non cheesy eye contact, do it till you get enough confidence to add more to that. "Hello. By the way, you look good in that dress." (Don't say that dress looks good on you, compliment her figure and not the clothing.) Eventually these simple hello's and simple compliments may turn into "thanks! You look good in that shirt." Match made in heaven right? It seems your journey is coming along.

People who reply may be against compliments. A lot of members here are advocates of negging, something to spark their curiosity about a flaw. The use of compliments right now isn't to pick up girls, this is to engage in conversation to help build your verbal skills. Who knows, things may go north. Just don't praise the girl, a compliment to spark their interest, the rest they have to earn... hard. You didn't earn your crown to court a queen. Eventually, you'll get into negging, having enough wit and confidence to stand your ground. I'm excited to see your progress and what's to come. Good luck friend.

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Seeking advice from someone doesn't mean you have admitted defeat. It means you have acknowledged their superiority, and with their guidance, you will become more superior as well.