First, I must say reading over the postings in this forum has already changed the way I view attraction. I have always been of the opinion that if I work hard to surround myself with success (career, appearance, etc) women would naturally come to me.

It all began in high school, when I overheard the girl of my dreams call me ugly. I felt terrible, utterly defeated and broken. But from that day forth, I vowed to do everything in my power to to prevent any female from ever evoking these feelings again.

I hit the gym, began studying fitness and nutrition and ultimately became what I thought to be the antithesis of my former self: a male model. The transition has been beyond painful, I have since had my appearance ripped apart many times, but I never stopped and built something of a niche in fitness modeling.

After moving to NYC to pursue this career, Ive appeared in Mens Health, Mens Fitness, etc as well as starting a successful corporate wellness company. Today, my appearance and professional career are blossoming. So what has this done for my luck with the opposite sex?

Not a damned thing. After being forced to interact with models and beautiful people, do I understand how little appearance matters. I feel as if Ive gained the appearance without the tools to go along with it. It makes me feel like an impostor. But I want all that to change.

Up to now, Ive overcompensated via over achievement. Rather than going out, I will hit the gym or bury myself in my building my business. Both worthwhile endevours, but they do nothing for my social life.

Reading over these threads makes me realize I can change. We all can change. My question is where do I begin? How do I go about building my confidence in a systematic fashion? How do I find a wing man or experienced PUA to help me along the way?

Any help/advice/inspiration would be sincerely appreciated. And if any PUA in NYC are interested, I will absolutely trade top notch fitness training for a bit of your wisdom.

PM me or post here and thanks again.

Spotter

Yo man...very admirable post.

I'm gonna be 100% honest with you,I respect and admire guys like you,and I'm glad someone like you has come!

You've known,time and time again,how hard it is to acheive something,yet at the end,it's all worth it.

You've taken the time to work at fitness,develop the mental toughness necessary to overtake every problem,and develop the fiery ambition that led you to you're career.

Yet when you said that being a model for Men's Health(A magazine I subscribe to regularly),you still didn't get any women,Had I still been an AFC,I'd be downright shocked and devastated.

Now,I've realized that's not the case.But still man,let me be honest with you:You're going to have an EXTREMELY easy time learning pick up,unlike most.

Dude,it's the same process as lifting,or living life itself.You will need to dedicate time,work past the pain periods,experiment and see what works,and ultimately,build your reperitoire of skills,mentalities,and techniques to become the champ.

You're inner game,I'll guess,might not be as up to par as you want it to be,but it's there.Solid.Growable.

All you need to do is learn the fundamentals,approach,build and fix the loose ends,and then keep at it.

Thank you for joining man.You're definitely an inspiration to people here.Hell,you've even inspired me(That takes some character,trust me).

The best of luck to you!

Wat up Spotter,

Reading your post was very much like viewing a reflection of my own beliefs and experiences, so i felt obliged to comment and reply. I thnk its safe to say that I’m in the same boat man!

I too wasn’t dealt the lucky card in life to be naturally comfortable and at ease with women, i just didnt have those experiences growing up.

I practically grew up in my parent’s cafe working around and serving beautiful stunning women ever since the age of 13, yet thats all i did was work and as a result was deprived of a teenage hood and social life, missing out on all the natural processes that come along with being a teen.

Although now I have a mentality for business like no other person i know, growing up in such an environment has allowed me to learn priceless negotiation and communication skills, I have my sights on becoming a global business tycoon and believe I can achieve that without a doubt in my mind, but when it comes to transferring this confidence to the area of women…..well, not quite on the same confidence level.

Don’t get me wrong I could talk to gorgeous chicks all the time no probs holding a casual conversation, I mean that was my job and I was very good at entertaining these women, making jokes n stuff but all on a professional level, then as soon as I’d start to flirt it just wouldn’t go anywhere, so I thought the solution would be to increase my “aesthetic appeal” so to speak.

Just like you I thought when I get into shape and start making big money the girls follow naturally, but I learned that this is faaaaar from the true reality. Like you I was trying to change my outer self when the real issue that needed to be addressed was on the inside. It’s all in the mind, that’s what lead me to studying the creative process and the mind in general!

Right now im in pretty good shape, not a male model or anything but women consider me good looking… but I dnt feel that confidence….man jst like u said its like I’m an imposter!

Hence me joining this forum yesterday, wanting to improve myself and my game to the highest potential level…PERFECTION!!, which by the sounds of things you seem to be a perfectionist yourself, in the area of physical fitness as well as mental development and business, so like blackbull said, learning pick up should be easier for u than most guys…not only because of your physical advantage but because of your drive and determination that lead you to the success you have today.

I am new to this forum and reasonably new to the game in general yet I have so much knowledge on the topic. I have a lot to learn yet the prospect of a challenge is what excites me. I have tons and tons of video content and material from many of the famous pickup artists, also the area of the mind in general, I will be willing to share this awsome material if u like.

All the best in your progress
And cheers to plenty successful sarges!!

magnum