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Can't motivate myself to go out into the field
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Author:  Sam [ Sun Sep 09, 2007 6:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Can't motivate myself to go out into the field
Hey.
I'm having quite some trouble motivating myself to just drive to the city and approach girls, i just think it would feel REALLY awkward just walking around in the streets approaching girls. And i have no friends whom are into the game that i can go with, so i have to go alone. I feel that I'm becoming a keyboard jockey(i know pretty much material).

Does anyone have a few good tips for me? Please, it would mean alot for me to get going :)
Author:  negsta [ Sun Sep 09, 2007 6:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
So, I've been out around town for half an hour. Tough going, as I didn't see anything I liked, and so couldn't motivate myself to pass my approach anxiety. After that I had to help my mom with some groceries. Then...

Time slows down. I see the perfect opening set across the street. They're in a cd shop, looking at the metal section. A 3 set(2 guys, one girl). I know metal well. I can use it to build rapport, or tool the guys if necessary. The girl looks bored and wanders away from the metal section. I know girls like her and guys like him and that inside she is pissed off at him right now.This sounds mixed up because it is. Inside me a little comedian is improvising lines to use to DHV. I need to sarge them as badly as I have ever needed to masturbate in my whole life(that was a lot).

Except I can't. I'm carrying a bag of shopping. The chance slips through my fingers.

Get out there. Soon a group will come along you won't be able to resist sarging. You have the knowledge to begin. Use it.
Author:  3 hands [ Sun Sep 09, 2007 7:36 pm ]
Post subject: 
A thing that helped me a lot is doing a little reacon of the area first. I went shopping a few times before I started working the area. Mostly because it was my first time really being ''alone'' in the big city. It's quite a lot to take in before you can actually start talking to more or less random people.

You might want to go to places that ''feel right'' first like a music store, café, the stuff your used to. And gradually get used to places that are better pick up grounds, like shopping malls, and clothing stores for example.

Also, try to find your vibe when your alone, just go walk around a bit alone, you'll get the hang of it pretty fast.
Author:  SexDrive [ Sun Sep 09, 2007 8:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Alright this might sound a little funny but, my mom has been selling Mary Kay for 20 years, quite succesfully. And the more I read about being a PUA the more I realize thats she is a PUA with just a different end goal. But one thing she would do when she needed to increase her "unit" was go out and "warm chatter" she called it. Basically goto public places where she could look for people to PU for her business. She gets numbers, leads, and most importantly, a large networking group. And as part of her hooks she invites the women and all thier friends to free facials or some shit like that. Imagine going out there and sarging business owners of clubs and resteraunts. Being on a first name basis and walking in the door and getting a table right away when there is a 45 minute wait (Ofcourse you might have to demostrate more than a personality to get VIP, you may have to have something to offer them that promote thier business) There are so many people in the world that you havnt more and likely never will, but if you get out there and "warm chatter" aka Practice your social skills will both men and women then you can better yourself for the ones you have yourself set on. Also by meeting and become friends with new people you have connections. With both guys and girls. I wouldnt approach a set of just guys cuz thats, kinda wierd unless you have something socially related to talk about. But the more people you know the more people you be introduced to. You have found your sets before ever seeing your target, becuase someone you meet today could tell you about a place tomorrow and you could meet the girl youve been looking to meet. So idk what other motavation you need other than to want to better yourself.

This makes me wonder too if there is a way to "PU" guys (In a non homo way, like get invited to parties, or clubs or any other social gathering and shit) in order to meet girls which also might prematurely solve any AMOG problems cuz you walk in the door and they are already cool with you and if you befriend girls and this happens now you walk in and have instant DHV and apparent social proof.

Dammit why am I inside right now?
Author:  Benchmark [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 11:51 am ]
Post subject: 
it also helps if you do got out just looking to open, have something else to do...like having to buy new clothes or pay a bill.
And don't be scared to practice on hire-guns they are imployed to talk to people,so let them open you, then asks them a open ended question and start running some game on them. (9 times out of 10 they will be bored, and you having a conversation with them could make their day)
Author:  Sam [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 1:55 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks guys! I guess if i could find an "objective" thus a reasonable reason to go to the city(not that picking up isn't a good reason). Maybe i could look for a few books, or something else, that way i don't need to think about walking around looking for sarges :)

I would really love to be able to go to a mall and just pick up girls, when i want to.

Yeah, I'm going to be like that!
Author:  Methuselah [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:44 pm ]
Post subject: 
Excuse me for being frank about this.

Stop being a bitch and just go, stop making excuses, stop putting it off, you are only wasting your time. If you really want to change, you would.
Author:  BlackBull [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 2:53 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Thanks guys! I guess if i could find an "objective" thus a reasonable reason to go to the city(not that picking up isn't a good reason). Maybe i could look for a few books, or something else, that way i don't need to think about walking around looking for sarges :)

I would really love to be able to go to a mall and just pick up girls, when i want to.

Yeah, I'm going to be like that!
People assume you're in the city to do something.Mostly Business,sometimes visit a friend.

...but that isn't what you want to know.

You're scared that,when you approach a set,they'll be like "Doesn't this guy have anything better to do?"

...fuck that shit.

95% of the people you encounter are VERY willing to engage in convo with you(Proven it's not just out on the street where everyone's rushing).
Just do it.Dont think about the consequences.Dont think about fucking up.Go in.9 times out of 10,you'll just might get that #close.

And if you happen to run into that 5% that dont respond,who gives a fuck?
Their loss.They want to be bitchy and miserable,thats their problem.

Seriously dude,suck it up.Failure will happen.Success will happen.Not acting should NOT happen.

Now go out there and dont come back till you got a number close in the city.Comprende!

I am done.
Author:  Mech [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 4:13 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Excuse me for being frank about this.

Stop being a bitch and just go, stop making excuses, stop putting it off, you are only wasting your time. If you really want to change, you would.
I feel like I'm doing nothing but quoting Meth's responses today ;)

In this type of situation, lack of motivation is nearly always fear in disguise. It's your mind's way of avoiding the unpleasantness of pushing your comfort zone, without making yourself feel like a wuss.

I think of this as the same type of behavior that's behind people saying "I'm too busy to work out".
Author:  DW [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 8:29 pm ]
Post subject: 
you can always do the newbie quest

just go somewhere that you'll never go again if your scared, go around a mall or some shit and say "Hi, how's it going?" to basically everyone you see. It's a good icebreaker for yourself, once you get this going your confidence will go up for sure, 'cause you'll realize not everyone is a fucking bitch, and you approach them. It works really well, give it a shot. Good luck
Author:  3 hands [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 9:05 pm ]
Post subject: 
What I've done lately about my fear of approaching is just when I was riding home on my bike talk to every one at each of the 500 trafic lights I encounter. I just felt like I missed a reason to talk to people but I just got myself over it by talking to some people about the weather, or about the traffic.

The basic idea you'll have to get into your head is that these people are mostly bored as hell and find it refreshing to talk to someone.

By the way DW if thats you in the picture nice freeze or side handspin ( if my eyes are not lieing to me)
Author:  DW [ Mon Sep 10, 2007 10:47 pm ]
Post subject: 
mhm for Sam, you should just try talking to strangers to help you get out of your noob shyness. once you get past the first, the rest are a breeze.

for 3 hands, no thats not me its hong 10, he won redbull pc one last year, so technically hes like the best breaker in the world..ish.
Author:  Sam [ Wed Sep 12, 2007 11:41 am ]
Post subject: 
Thanks alot. And i don't mind if people are being frank, i need to hear the truth :) And, yes, it's just my fear that's pushing me into my comfort zone...here, behind the computer screen. I'll try the newbie mission too :)
Author:  RsoeHelk [ Wed Sep 12, 2007 8:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
PEACKOCK..USE CLOTIHNG THATS WILL GET PEOPLE ATTENTION..
AND CLOTHES U FEEL GOOD IN WEARING..
DONT THINK OF IT AS JUST SARGING GURLS.
THINK OF IT ASS U WENT TO GET A DRINK AND CAME ACROSS THESE GURLS.. THERE IS A REASON FOR THE FALSE TIME CONSTRAINT..
NOT THAT U REALLY HAVE TO GO ANYWHERE..BUT JUST PUT UR MIND IN A DIFFERENT ANGLE.. SEE IT IN A DIFERENT WAY..
Author:  Dirk Debonaire [ Thu Sep 20, 2007 7:52 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Can't motivate myself to go out into the field
Quote:
Hey.
I'm having quite some trouble motivating myself to just drive to the city and approach girls, i just think it would feel REALLY awkward just walking around in the streets approaching girls. And i have no friends whom are into the game that i can go with, so i have to go alone. I feel that I'm becoming a keyboard jockey(i know pretty much material).

Does anyone have a few good tips for me? Please, it would mean alot for me to get going :)
Either go or don't go. Don't sit around thinking about it. The more the thought of going or not goes around in your head the worse you feel. You feel awkward about going out? Fine, don't go out. Do something else that's worthwhile and stimulating instead. Play an interesting computer game, or watch an interesting movie for instance. Basically, do something so you feel like you're not wasting your time.

I know I've spent hours lying on my bed wishing I was out there sarging, when I could have been. And it just makes me depressed, and I think it makes things harder. I think what we have to do is just enjoy life as much as we can with how it is. Yes, we're not PUAs scoring fcloses on a regular basis, but that doesn't mean we should get all hung up about it. We either get out there and do it or we don't. No point in making our whole lifes a misery because of it.

Of course, there's a difference between not being ready and procrastinating. I'm still struggling trying to clearly delineate the two. :(
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