Yo JP,

Get over your approach anxiety.

The only reason I can think of for "not wanting to flirt" with other women is that you fear other women will shoot you down and being 'married' will only add insult to injury. Or perhaps you're religion doesn't allow you within 5 foot radius of 'other women'?

Here's what happens in any TRUSTING long term relationship. You're both secure with each other that you don't need to please each other visually all the time. Neither of you dress for that "boom!" sex appeal. You no longer try to gain attention from other people and this translates to "you no longer try to gain attention from each other as much as you used to . . ."

Get yourself a game. The fact that you will never cheat on your wife is the foundations for a great inner game. You will never come across as desperate or needy to any other girls. Learn to open them, learn routines. Challenge yourself. You need to figure out what gets these girls hot for you. Wear cologne. Dress well. Dress sexy. Many cases to be made for 'flirting' with other girls.

1. You will in fact be 'practicing' routines that you will use on your wife.

2. You will gain confidence. Confidence, many women will tell you, is the hottest thing going.

3. You will attract attention from other women. This extrudes a ton of emotions from your wife = a. Pride(she really did get herself a great catch), b. fear (shit, he could still go out and grab any girl he wants to!), c. jealousy (self explanatory)

What does this all add up to? Sexual fucking tension that's what.

Don't believe a word that your wife tells you IF she says, "I don't like the way that girl is looking at you blah, blah, blah . . " Don't make excuses. Don't qualify yourself to her. Just let her make her little speech while you just tear her fucking clothes off with your eyes. When she's done, make your short announcement, "You are so fucking hot right now, I'm going to drill my dick into your pussy standing up!" Boom!

Every woman has a jealousy threshold. Obviously, if you enjoy a 3 some with 2 girls you picked up at a bar, you've crossed the line. If a random girl walks by and give you a 'look' and your wife notices, it might not trigger enough emotions. You have to calibrate and play this game. And it doesn't even have to be too sexual. Example:

I was at a bar the other night with a friendly date (that's what I'm calling her for now). She knows the bartender, the waitresses, and even some of the customers there. The bartender can't get the top of the cocktail shaker off(it's been stuck on overnight) so he gives it to his other bartender buddy(strong looking dude) and he can't do it. In frustration, he hands the thing to me. (Guys, if you don't know that shakers come off with a light tap and a twist . . . well now you know)

After already loosening the top off, I continued to look like I was struggling a bit and told the bartender, "Dude, it's totally stuck on. You ought to soak it in hot water or something." So the guy puts his hand out for the shaker. I give it back to him, but I hold on to the top so that when he retrieves the shaker, the top stays in my hand. He goes, "Woh!" . . . and I go, "Woh!"

Then he beams a smile and nods his head, points finger at me, and goes, "Ohh. . . you're good. You're good . . ." Looks at my date and goes, "Ohh . . . this guy is good . . " Then he goes, "Stand up. What are you 7 ft. tall?!" Of course the waitress zones right in and begins to squeeze my biceps, sneaks in a hug, and adds, "Oh, you're so strong . . ." (Or something like that) You think my date enjoyed this or not? Do you think your wife will enjoy this or not?

Without a reference point, there is no way for her to realize how incredible you are . . . Without keeping her on her toes, she won't dress or act as sexy as she can. As for the "game", I know guys make it work but I've always considered the 1 dimensional game to be weak and boring. (Seek 1 target, routine, win or lose) My opinion doesn't change even in regards to the "wife game".