bam,
Playing the cute gay guy is very different from being physically manhandled and being labeled a rapist. There is absolutely nothing playful about "rape". There is no segway or bridge to make this topic fun. There should be no smileys or ha ha's at all with this topic. Reading the op actually pissed me off a bit. Nobody should have to deal with this crap but what the hell, kids are kids . . .
Lordica . . . something's gone terribly wrong and I feel for you. Look . . . I'm going to freely admit that I was a bit of an ass when I was younger and I still remember giving some guys plenty of hell. I still think about it to this day and think, "Why the hell did I do all that?" I mean . . . I think I understand it from a psychological point of view but I just can't believe all the energy I wasted on making some other people feel so terrible.
Well, here's the scoop. First, don't take this personally. You've somehow framed your social reality with these guys to "allow" them to be assholes to you. I bet they don't even treat REAL ASSHOLES the way they treat you. This is very important. If you take this personally, you won't be able to treat this situation as a game. . . . because that's exactly what this is. Just as if you're gaming hb's who are shit testing you, you're going to have to stand your ground and PLAY THIS GAME.
Next, you're going to have to accept that there is no simple amog strategy out of this. No one liners like, "Stop it!", "You're being an asshole!" is going to work. If the whole flat is ganging up on you, there is a strong possibility that you have unconsciously stuck a “pick on me” sticker on your forehead. I’ve noticed through my experiences with various social circles that guys who get picked on, get picked on no matter where they go, no matter who they’re with.
So . . . I think there are two strategies we need to work on here. 1st is a “self game”. (How do you improve yourself so that you’re not a target to ANYBODY)
2nd, how do you deal with these inadequate losers in your flat?
I. Self Game.
1. Start hitting the gym. I have no idea what you look like. But if those guys are picking you up and they’re not Olympic Greco Roman Wrestlers, you obviously don’t make a physical impression. They’ve identified you as an easy “physical target”. You don’t have to look like a body builder but you shouldn’t look like a dweeb. Have you ever seen a strong looking dude get picked on?
This is something you can do in your spare time. 3 times a week, 40 minutes a time. In 2 months, you will notice a difference and this will drastically improve your game with the girls both mentally and physically . . . (I was once a university level athletics coach. PM me if you want tips on how to start)
2. You need to find some hobbies and talents that are uniquely yours. Your flat mates play guitar and etc . . . You need to find a talent of yours that transcends stupid labels. You ever hear of a dweeb who kicks ass on the guitar? You ever hear of a kick ass surfer who’s a dweeb? If you already have a talent, you have to showcase it. . . be proud of it.
3. Look respectable. Ever wonder why you see a guy in a suit and you think, "Mr." or "Sir"? It makes a difference. Get rid of any "tourist T shirts". Get rid of any clownish shit. Wear rich, solid, strong colors. Guys don't think this makes a difference but it makes a HUGE difference. Bouncers wear certain clothes so they DON'T have to get into fights.
II. Dealing With The Inadequate Needle Dicks.
1. STOP HANGING OUT with them for now. They need you to play the part of the “victim” in order to fulfill their needs to pick on some one. For now, avoid events and places where it’s conducive for them to pick on you for some dumb ass show and instead, hit the gym, work on your hobbies, etc . .
These guys need you to be around as much as you think you need to “hang out” with these guys. They pick on you, yet you still tag along. In the Pick Up game, HB's lead us along with their shit tests and most AFC's continue to call them and shower them with attention. You have to STOP being an AFC with your flat mates.
You should have a list of fun shit that you do. So it goes something like:
They say, "Hey, we're going to _____."
You say, "Cool, but I'm going to the gym."
They'll say, "What? You working out? Blah blah blah . . ." (Translation: We have very small dicks)
You laugh and say, "See ya . . ."
You see where we're going with this? This is the game you should have for HB's and this is the game you should be playing on your flat mates . . .
Concentrate on yourself. Work on yourself. Remember, you're the prize to girls and you are the leader of men but you haven't been able convince these guys yet. it'll take time. Have patience. Don't make it seem like you're "avoiding" them. You simply have too many more important things to do.
2. Continue to SARGE. You're hitting the gym so you'll find girls there. Do the yoga classes. Do the spin classes. Go to the museum EVERY sunday afternoon. Go to book stores. Go FIND THE WOMEN. Let your friends play out the fraternity gig at the bars. You already know the limitations of their game. 1. Drink. 2. Growl. 3. Pick on some guys. 4. Maybe get lucky but probably not so go back home to play guitar at 4 am. (This was NEVER your goal anyways. Stop leaning on your dorky friends) YOU ABSOLUTELY DO NOT NEED THEM.
Now let me tell you what #2 above achieves. Take the sarging 1 step at a time. Build rapport. Look, you're going to the gym over, over, and over again so you don't need to rush. Flirt, flirt, flirt. #close . . . email close . . .
1 month later, your flat mates go, "Hey, we're going to _____."
Now you say, "Oh dude, I'm going to ____ Cafe with Catherine." . . . "I'm seeing a movie with Angela." . . . . "Chrissy invited me to her party . . ."
Now see where we're going with this? Hey, you're hanging out with chicks all the time, while they're going to bars to sing fraternity songs and guzzle beer, only to come home late night to play guitar at 4am. How long do you think it will be until they go, "Yo Lordica? Eh . . . so, what are you up to this weekend?" ---- Hey, go up to the mirror and take a good look. Tell yourself, "I'm a leader of men . . ."
Take your time, don't take it personally, work on yourself, and you will absolutely see a shift in social dynamics around your flat. . . but if you don't take this shit seriously now and grab your life by the HORNS, this could be a very miserable life for you. It's all within your control.
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, i get so much shit about "being gay" and most of the time i play it off by either making the guy who said it very unconfortable by hitting on him ect ect. All the girls know im straight theres no doubt and they love me but the guys get jealous of your game and try to ruin it. Chump move bring it up with the guys make fun of em for it ect ect. Play along with the rapist thing with a very playful way dont deny it wont go over very well with the girl, she wont know what to believe (she basically knows you arent a rapist its a just a shit test which your bros helped her brg into the set lol)