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| Question on oneitis https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=29459 |
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| Author: | AFCEastChampion [ Sat Oct 04, 2008 2:47 am ] |
| Post subject: | Question on oneitis |
Does it mean time to abandon ship, 100% no questions asked no hesitation? A little background on me: My name is accurate, I've dabbled in reading PUA material before but never really applied myself, I'm kind of a flirt but have pretty much 0 ability to close or even approach outside of my few comfort zones(at work, just entering a bar, looking bored in a club and letting them approach). Anyway the reason I'm asking is I caught the oneitis bug last week, was approached by a girl(I'd say about an 8 or 9), brief comment and she left, came back next day, AFC chit chat, spent weekend planning planning planning all these "smooth moves", lost nerve the second I saw her again, feel like it's pretty much not gonna happen. But I caught myself and since then I've been more chatty and outgoing and I'm getting more attention and could probably close a ton of other girls. I'm not in love with her or anything, just very much aware of her. Like, every other girl is "out of sight out of mind" while she's "out of sight, OMG I bet she's at this very moment fucking every other dude besides me simultaneously". Sorry for long post, any helpful comments appreciated. |
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| Author: | The Flow [ Sat Oct 04, 2008 3:16 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
It's a hard thing to hear, but the best advice is to just forget about her. I know because I used to have a bad case of oneitis. The more you think about her the worse your game gets. You'll keep telling yourself "I'm not gonna approach cuz I'm waiting for 'her'..." This is absolute bullshit and you need to just man up and get out there. The best attitude to have is "I don't give a shit." If you do happen to see her again just think, "I don't give a shit." Remember you are the prize and NO single women is worth obsessing about. |
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| Author: | AFCEastChampion [ Sat Oct 04, 2008 3:25 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks, not my first bout of it. And I know that the only reason she even approached me in the first place is because I literally didn't give a shit. Then once I got her name it was just like high school, "Ooh, goody, the "hard" part is out of the way now". |
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| Author: | Plethora [ Sat Oct 04, 2008 8:49 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yea, the best thing you can do is put it behind you. The oneitis syndrome is completely irrational and has no place in todays society. It is hardwired into our systems because we are evolutionarily designed for tribal existence (of 50 or so people) and if we find a mate that seems perfect, we become infatuated because it might be our only chance for successful procreation. Obviously in todays society there are thousands of suitable mates within a couple kilometer radius, so this feeling is ridiculous. Just recognize it as your body and mind leading you on a path that is futile and it should help you. Also try and sarge a log and meet other women, it should help you forget about her. If you really want to be with her, you are going to have to make yourself lose interest in her. You can either play it cool, cocky funny, and date other women, making her attraction rise, or you can lay it on the line and possibly be completely shut down (and pretty much ruining the friendship). |
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