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| Need Idea's/Openers https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=29163 |
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| Author: | Rutz [ Mon Sep 29, 2008 10:55 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Need Idea's/Openers |
Well yeah, im honestly horrible at talking to random people unless one of my friends know them and are there. But yeah i was wondering what i could do for openers at places like bus stops, subways, buses and maybe even malls. And if it makes it any easier, i can sing, beatbox and breakdance.. and im actually good. i dont know how i would incorporate any of that or if its even useful.. just a AFC looking for guidance. |
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| Author: | Solomon II [ Mon Sep 29, 2008 11:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
First of all, don't sing or any of that stuff. It's tryhard. When you say you can make conversation when your friend knows the person and is there, this suggests to me that your friend makes up most of the conversation and you chime in occasionally when you can. If this is not the case and you are actually quite outgoing when your friend introduces you to someone, then there is no real reason why you can't just do this with strangers. You probably just feel a little anxious about doing it because it's outside of your comfort zone and that's understandable... however, if you wanna change this you have to do it and do it now. This stuff is easy to do, but you have to focus on the social aspect first rather than trying to pick girls up straight away. Seriously. Go and chat to girls, ask what they've been up to that day and talk about anything that comes to mind... get to know them a little, be friendly and talk to them as a way of passing time and nothing else. Without the underlying motive of picking them up, you will be a lot more at ease because you'll be focusing on the interaction at hand rather than the outcome. This is something you must do because when it comes to actually picking girls up you have to do the exact same thing... forget about the consequences and focus on the now. The reason why a lot of guys get nervous about approaching girls or running out of stuff to say is because of the agenda... they want to make sure they build attraction and comfort and do so many things perfectly because they want to get her number or whatever and in the case of a lot of new guys, it is painfully obvious that they're hitting on her. Not that there's anything wrong with that, girls are used to it, but when it's obvious that you're hitting on her and you're trying to hide those intentions, it's a different story. Just relax and enjoy yourself. If you have this agenda and the mindset that you need to do certain things the right way and you're worrying about your structure and doing everything correctly, you aren't being yourself and everything can seem very mechanical and calculated. I wanna keep this short so just go up to a girl, say hi and ask how she's doing... if she's friendly, stay and talk for a while. If not, it's her loss. Find a different girl. Like I said, focus on approaching and making light chat until it comes naturally and you can just do it. Then you can start to learn how to direct conversations into closing her and start experimenting with the juicy stuff. There is no quick fix, this will take time. |
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| Author: | Rutz [ Tue Sep 30, 2008 12:51 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Yeah, i thought that about singing LOL.. but yeah thanks, im really outgoing after the ice breaks.. i guess the only thing im scared about is that im only 16.. and attempting to talk to a girl around my age is dangerous cause if you embarass yourself and look stupid along the way.. everyone knows everyone.. they tell their friends and im doomed. not to mention how akward it'd be if you saw them again.. wow i need to stop worrying.. but yeah i dont really care much for getting numbers, i'm more worried about leaving on a good note and not looking stupid. well, i guess i wont know until i try. |
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| Author: | danieltx [ Tue Sep 30, 2008 1:26 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Quote: Yeah, i thought that about singing LOL.. but yeah thanks, im really outgoing after the ice breaks.. i guess the only thing im scared about is that im only 16.. and attempting to talk to a girl around my age is dangerous cause if you embarass yourself and look stupid along the way.. everyone knows everyone.. they tell their friends and im doomed. not to mention how akward it'd be if you saw them again.. wow i need to stop worrying.. but yeah i dont really care much for getting numbers, i'm more worried about leaving on a good note and not looking stupid. well, i guess i wont know until i try.
Nothing from high school matters after you graduate. Get out of that mindset.
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