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# closed - but have some questions...
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=27400
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Author:  frankj [ Sat Aug 30, 2008 11:33 am ]
Post subject:  # closed - but have some questions...

I was doing a cooking class today and was in a group with a HB7. We were chatting periodically over the few hours we were there and got some decent IOI's.

So afterwards I ask her if she could help me with some homework (I'm in Japan BTW - studying Japanese). She agreed, a little bit reticently, but agreed nonetheless. So I'm like 'when are you free?'. She starts crapping on about being busy and basically the whole vibe drops from being really friendly to kind of uncomfortable. I start getting nervous and just get her number and say goodbye.

My question is this: How do you handle a girl who seems to be interested in you but starts getting flaky when it comes to actually setting something up?

I think I kind of fucked it up at the end by coming off pushy. I will call her Monday, and I would like some advice on how to take things from here. I'm thinking of just chatting for a bit at first ('comfort building' as Mystery calls it) and re-establishing a friendly vibe. But again, how do I get her to commit to something. I know she works pretty much the same hours as me, so from her end I'm pretty sure she's just not comfortable enough with me.

Thanks guys!

Author:  jsquared [ Sat Aug 30, 2008 2:20 pm ]
Post subject: 

You very may well have not possessed the amount of rapport you thought to close. However, all the same you did.

The main issue that I see is that you asked her when she was free. You should have tossed out a time and day, instead of leaving it up to her. At that point you allowed her to lead the interaction.

Also I can tell you from personal experience that Japanese women are much more reserved. Especially in Japan. I lived there for a fair portion of my life, and the culture of courtship is far different from ours. In the case of this, you need more comfort than attration.

Author:  frankj [ Sat Aug 30, 2008 3:40 pm ]
Post subject: 

Quote:
You should have tossed out a time and day, instead of leaving it up to her.
Agreed, but what do I do when she says she's busy that day? Just keep hacking away tossing up dates until she agrees seems a little pathetic and not likely to suceed (remember I've asked her to do me a favor).

But yeah, agree with you on the comfort thing. Def when I call her just some friendly chit-chat could be in order before trying to figure out a time to meet...

Thanks!

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