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| "Picking Up" and ex girlfriend https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=26891 |
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| Author: | Marlow [ Thu Aug 21, 2008 7:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | "Picking Up" and ex girlfriend |
I have a huge dilemma, gentleman, and I really need some feedback. The solution to this may be a lot more complicated or a lot more simple than what meets the eye: Heres the situation: I've met and dated this one girl last year, when I was unaware of how AFC i was. However, how I got her was doing things such as negging, demonstrating value, and "cavemanning" before I even knew what I was doing. Anywho, she grew to know the AFC me. 9 months later, this april, we broke up. She has recently re-entered my life, and I am much different today than I was back then. Since then, I have had decent success with women, mostly by getting my day game down. However, my conflict is this: I have been using the methods I learned on her, aka cold reading, ESP, negging, DHV's, etc. She has told me that she has noticed a huge change in me, but all that stuff doesn't have the same effect that it does on random girls that I sarge. I keep trying to use the methods that have brought me success before, but they just haven't gotten the same response. She has since spent the last 2 nights with me, we've spooned in bed but nothing more. *I feel like a little AFC bitch, and I have no clue what I'm doing. I feel like this is one-itis, and I'm going right back to square one. On the flip side, I really do enjoy this challenge, it's kind of fun. **Maybe some of you guys have experienced the same situation, and if so, please contribute some intel or advice that applies to this type of situation. It's like an unlockable level on a video game or some shit. |
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| Author: | Phaedra [ Thu Aug 21, 2008 7:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Before I answer, I have a few questions. 1. Why did you break up in April? 2. Why are you seeing each other again and how did that come about? 3. How does she react to the new you? Is she digging it, or is she confused? Thanks. Then maybe I can give you my perspective. |
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| Author: | Stetson [ Thu Aug 21, 2008 7:52 pm ] |
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I quess this could be referred to you jumping from the "love"-ladder to the "friends only"-ladder when you broke up with her. Use humor and hard kino man, a bit of jealousy too (but don't do the same mistake as I did... Which is overdoing the jealousy part  ).
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| Author: | Marlow [ Thu Aug 21, 2008 8:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Phaedra, 1) We felt that we would be better off as friends. It was mutual, but I initiated it because she gained too much weight. she has since lost it and then some. That and we just fought way too much towards the end of the relationship over stupid shit. 2) She called me to come pick up some clothes that I left at her place way back when we dated. This occured like 2 weeks ago. Previous to that she had a fling with a guy that lasted 2 weeks, and I get the feeling she is still reeling from that. I told her no hard feelings and to call me if she ever wanted to do anything. She called me 5 days later. This I did not expect. 3) She seems to be digging the new me. She initiates very involved conversations, such as my view on spirituality and life. **Also, a lot of the people she hung around with were MY friends. I am a bit skeptical because I cant tell if I'm getting legitimate IOI's or if she just trying to re-penitrate my social circle. |
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| Author: | Phaedra [ Thu Aug 21, 2008 9:48 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for the info, that helps. It seems she contacted you first, to come get things you left before you broke up. We do things like that  , it's an excuse to contact someone again when the time is right. And it seems she was and is still reeling from a fling. Now, if that fling left her hurt, she is calling you for comfort. So she could be on the rebound, and you're the guy. Just because nothing physical has happened yet, doesn't mean she's not interested in you that way. She could just see you as a friend, someone to comfort you, or maybe she's testing the waters, trying to figure out if you're the one for her. I like what the other poster said, try the kino approach and see if she is at all responsive. I'm not sure what you want from her. Do you want to get into a relationship again? Do you want a gf? Or do you want a casual hook up? If you want the latter, be careful. She seems vulnerable right now so she may not be the best target for now. I'm a girl (you could probably tell) and I'm not opposed to casual/FWB but I prefer if it's negotiated up front, so I don't get my feelings in a tangle. |
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| Author: | Stetson [ Sat Aug 23, 2008 6:29 am ] |
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Quote: 1) We felt that we would be better off as friends. It was mutual, but I initiated it because she gained too much weight. she has since lost it and then some. That and we just fought way too much towards the end of the relationship over stupid shit.
Well this brings the whole case to a new light. But still the reason for her bad response to the ESP readings and other methods... I would say that she isn't used to the "new you". I have had a similar experience about ESPs just like you have now, and there are many different scenarios about it. |
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