PUA Forum :: Getting IOIs what could I have done better..

Quote:

thanks guys just starting out, also I mirrored her a lot

Where'd you hear about that one? Most PUA sources I've heard from usually say to not mirror since that can come off as a form of supplication. Instead, adopt the dominant frame and have her subconsciously mirror you. Although, it could be possible that mirroring could be useful in some instances... so who'd you hear that one from?

I haven't done much reading on NLP, but I was talking to someone else who has and he told me that mirroring helps to build rapport. He also said that usually he can mirror someone's body language and then after a little bit he'll change his body position and then a lot of times the other person will follow subconsciously. So I guess that would be leading. *shrug*

Author:	natrino [ Wed Jul 09, 2008 9:01 pm ]
Post subject:	Getting IOIs what could I have done better..
Hey guys fairly new here, I bumped into this girl I know thru a friend in a pub whilst I was just getting a quick drink, Met her a couple times and talked online. I spotted her and went to the bar and got her attention she was like ''hi'' and gave me a hug asked me to join her and her friends, I was sat next to her she maintained conversation with me and kept giving kino and i returned it, asked her where she got her boots ''theyre really nice..blah blah'' she played with her hair a couple of times and was asking me about my sex life and teasing me thought i get going ''have to get back to this..'' she didnt seem happy about that and was like ''what if you got a later train..'' gave her hug. She says she does flirt with guys but didnt really flirt with any of the guys there but theyre were good friends. want to keep out of the ''lets just be friends zone'' Was i getting clear IOI and did i return them in the right what could i have said done better/what can i do when i se her next?

Author:	Chief [ Thu Jul 10, 2008 12:32 am ]
Post subject:
Yeah, you were getting IOIs. Turn on sexual frame. Read Gunwitch's stuff for more on that. It's basically a controlled state of horniness. Triangular gaze. SOI. Kino escalate. Calibrate your own IOIs with IODs (negs and takeaways). Two steps forward, one step back. Push/pull.

Author:	MSmith19 [ Thu Jul 10, 2008 12:52 am ]
Post subject:
Good move on the exit and time restraint though. Yeah, when you make eye contact, repeat in your head something like "I wanna fuck your brains out" or "You want me" - IN YOUR HEAD - this has usually worked for me. Isolate, bit more comfort then K-close.

Author:	natrino [ Fri Jul 11, 2008 2:14 am ]
Post subject:
thanks guys just starting out, also I mirrored her a lot

Author:	Chief [ Sat Jul 12, 2008 8:33 am ]
Post subject:
Quote: thanks guys just starting out, also I mirrored her a lot Where'd you hear about that one? Most PUA sources I've heard from usually say to not mirror since that can come off as a form of supplication. Instead, adopt the dominant frame and have her subconsciously mirror you. Although, it could be possible that mirroring could be useful in some instances... so who'd you hear that one from?

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Author:	Hopeless Romantic [ Sat Jul 12, 2008 12:47 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: thanks guys just starting out, also I mirrored her a lot Where'd you hear about that one? Most PUA sources I've heard from usually say to not mirror since that can come off as a form of supplication. Instead, adopt the dominant frame and have her subconsciously mirror you. Although, it could be possible that mirroring could be useful in some instances... so who'd you hear that one from? I haven't done much reading on NLP, but I was talking to someone else who has and he told me that mirroring helps to build rapport. He also said that usually he can mirror someone's body language and then after a little bit he'll change his body position and then a lot of times the other person will follow subconsciously. So I guess that would be leading. shrug

Author:	Chief [ Sat Jul 12, 2008 11:37 pm ]
Post subject:
Quote: Quote: Quote: thanks guys just starting out, also I mirrored her a lot Where'd you hear about that one? Most PUA sources I've heard from usually say to not mirror since that can come off as a form of supplication. Instead, adopt the dominant frame and have her subconsciously mirror you. Although, it could be possible that mirroring could be useful in some instances... so who'd you hear that one from? I haven't done much reading on NLP, but I was talking to someone else who has and he told me that mirroring helps to build rapport. He also said that usually he can mirror someone's body language and then after a little bit he'll change his body position and then a lot of times the other person will follow subconsciously. So I guess that would be leading. shrug Ah, yes of course. Pacing and leading.

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