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i just realised my main issue with girls... and i need help
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Author:  KodakMoment [ Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:51 am ]
Post subject:  i just realised my main issue with girls... and i need help
Coming to this site has finally showed me my problem though i don't know which direction to take. I would say im an attractive guy, i always try to be fun and exciting to make a girl smile. I just started reading about this "kino" first time i've heard about it, about trying to be touchy with girls to show your sexual i suppose. However related to that, i have always gotten girls into the "friend zone" because i've been doing it for so long, im used to it however im trying to meet a girl and have some intimate fun because i have been always shy when going out with a girl to kiss her. I have no problem with getting dates or asking a girl out, but in the end im always shy to go for a kiss, i suppose im afraid of rejection even tho many people say i shouldn't be. I really want to know how and be confident about ending a get together or date with a kiss. I need help in overcoming this, because i want to always kiss the girls but i tend to avoid rejection, because in my head im thinking if i go in for a kiss she might say no and back away, or i dont know how to find the right moment to kiss her.
Author:  Konfusion [ Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:47 am ]
Post subject: 
in almost every one of your sentences you type that you are TRYING to be or do something...your first course of action is to stop trying to conform to what you think others want. You know what you want and part of being alpha is going after what you want and being indifferent to what others think about you.

Find out who you are, become interesting by finding what you are interested in because believe it or not, women are NOT the most important thing to have and should not be your main goal of learning "pick up" (think about it and im sure it will make sense)
Author:  onlyindreams [ Tue Jun 24, 2008 5:13 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
in almost every one of your sentences you type that you are TRYING to be or do something...your first course of action is to stop trying to conform to what you think others want. You know what you want and part of being alpha is going after what you want and being indifferent to what others think about you.

Find out who you are, become interesting by finding what you are interested in because believe it or not, women are NOT the most important thing to have and should not be your main goal of learning "pick up" (think about it and im sure it will make sense)

Great post!... I'm reminded of a part in Thunderkiss '65 where the girl says "I never try anything, I just do it. Wanna try me?"
Author:  Rye Lee [ Tue Jun 24, 2008 7:11 am ]
Post subject: 
You have to stop thinking about things in such a 1960's mentality of kissing the girl at the end of the date. In fact, drop the whole concept of going out on a date, because that puts far too much pressure on the whole thing. Instead just meet up with her to "hang out" and then you can do basically whatever, you don't have this feeling of having to plan some special activity and rules that govern dates.

When you're hanging out with her and you are building attraction and she starts to show IOIs, then you just kiss her, regardless of whether it is the end of the "date" or not. By kissing her midway through your time together, you aren't so cliche, plus there isn't that pressure and awkwardness that often occurs when you're parting ways, so it makes kissing much easier to accomplish because she is more comfortable, so her shields are down.
Author:  KodakMoment [ Tue Jun 24, 2008 2:22 pm ]
Post subject: 
hmm this is great advice, i know you guys are all telling me to stop thinking about it and just go ahead and kiss her. how am i going to take this approach so i can break my regular habits? i want it to seem like a natural thing that i want to kiss her rather than making it that i have to kiss her at the end because its a date. Also when im out with the girls they are flirting with me and in my head i know she is attracted to me, but i always perceive that she doesnt like me that much to wanna kiss me, i know its all in my head.
Author:  Konfusion [ Tue Jun 24, 2008 5:27 pm ]
Post subject: 
You can learn it just like you learn anything else...use a sport for example...if you want to learn how to serve better in tennis then you serve over and over again for practice...if you want to learn to approach better you do that over and over again with girls...the same goes for kissing them.

Your posts come across as wanting instant results and that is DEFINITELY not how it is. I'm going to try to help you grasp a concept that I and many others faced when they first came here.

So here it is... THERE IS NOT a magic formula to gaining confidence and success with women. We cannot tell you how to conquer whatever walls you have inside your brain that are stopping you from achieving your success. So here is what you have to do. You attack this task just like you would any other goal in your life...You break the BIG goal down into smaller more manageable goals. You want to kiss girls? FINE but dont even look at that part of the picture yet.

First you need to develop a strong inner game which will actually draw women to you (you will notice it if u pay attention)

Second you need to start actually APPROACHING women...hell! say whatever you want, the goal here is not to pick her up, but to improve YOURSELF

and Thirdly...stop analyzing it so in depth...all these girls that you claim will go "on dates" with you and "flirt" with you may already consider you LJBF'd from how you previously acted towards them...and u dont even know it yet...take it one step at a time...see your mistakes...and work on them individually...

Women flirt and go out with their friends all the time....but they don't FUCK their friends...
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