PUA Forum
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

HELP! ONEITIS! TRAPPED!
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=20771		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Method One [ Wed Apr 23, 2008 3:27 am ]
Post subject:  HELP! ONEITIS! TRAPPED!
Whats up guys....I have a bit of a problem :x

So there's this girl. A girl that i obsessed over for a year. She would never leave my mind. Well now we're both 16 and close friends...i've lost my obsession over her but she's still my oneitis going strong. i've dropped the fantasy bullshit that every guy thinks about when he catches the oneitis but i still cannot get over her. With out help or somethin pretty drastic, I'll never lose this illness.
I've tried ignoring her( my record was almost a full week). I've tried fucking/sarging her out of my mind. I've tried being an asshole to her, but nothing seems to work- she over powers me. Every couple of weeks, for 100's of weeks, when i feel like i've had enough( over and over again)
i'll try ignoring her but i always end up back in her clutches because she'll sneak up behind me and give me a big embracing hug, tell me she loves me, sweet talk me or anything of the such that will completely lower my shields and allow her back into my life.
When i be a dick to her, she just walks away to class, and next period she'll return all happy to see me an just give me a cute little face that completely destroys my defenses. THIS GIRL IS THE DEVIL, the sweetest, sexiest, awesome devil i've ever come around.

I honestly don't know how to cure my oneitis. I kniow there's no chance of me getting another chance with her(screwed that up a year ago). I've accepted that we're just friends, but i guess the lust is so great, my mind won't allow me to move on. A big factor that won't allow me to get over her is that her locker is right by mine, i can't ignore her there cuz she won't allow it, i can't be a dick to her because my "inschool friend", her boyfriend shares her locker and that's just awkward. She must enjoy this in some sick kind of way cuz when i get just a little close to being set free and on to my PUA life, she tears my dream away and makes me "fall in love" for her again. Now i know i don't actually love this girl because i've recognized its only lust. My brain gets lust confused with love and as a result, i am defeated by my oneitis.

Edit: More to come but it's bed time.. I appreciate advice from anyone who thinks they can already help
Author:  Mad Hatter [ Wed Apr 23, 2008 5:54 am ]
Post subject: 
Ok, u r 16! Your body is all fucked up emotionally, trust me we all went through it. I mean i still get all wierd around my first ex. It is alittle wierd thing our mind does to us because it was the first person that has givn us those feelings. Just keep sarging, youwill eventually find another girl that makes you feel this way! You are young and have so much oppertunity ahead of you, if this doesnt work, and you are still fkin crazy about this girl, try holding off till this summer, go somewhere and forget about her, keep yourself busy. Dont say you cant, this is all mental
Author:  NOILLUSION [ Wed Apr 23, 2008 6:00 am ]
Post subject: 
dude, you should read, "The Alchemist" a short fiction/novel by Paulo Coelho.
it says that you should always put your dreams above the person you like/love, and eventually, the person of your dreams will come to you.
Author:  Method One [ Thu Apr 24, 2008 2:12 am ]
Post subject: 
ok here comes the part where i'm trapped. Me and her aren't exactly in the same friend circles, but a few of my friends are friends with her and her friends, vice versa.
I can't confront her about my feelings and just tell her that she's fuckin with my head too much and i think i'd be better left off not being friends with her because she'd let the world know and i'd get shit even from people i dont even know. She'd cry an cry an some people would even stop talking to me. She's one of those girls that everyone loves an enjoys to be around. If I hurt her, it'd be like i shot someone to the kids at school. I think my life would go to hell, just because i told this girl i couldn't "be with" her anymore. That's why i feel trapped, if i ignore her long enough, she'd call my cell phone till i answered. And if i never answered, she'd call my house, my parents would answer and i'd HAVE to talk to her. I don't know why she has to do this to me. She told me i'm one of the 4 closest people to her which is why i'd also feel bad about DEfriending her.
I don't know what to do, i have an awesome life but always have this constant struggle with my feelings or lust for her.
And i can't get a girlfriend because i haven't been able to allow myself to think there's a better girl out there for me. She always overmatches any other chick.
If i can break my oneitis off, i'll be a PUA master in no time but things are lookin pretty dim right now.

Thanks to anyone who reads this and tries to help a fellow go getter out.
Author:  Method One [ Fri Apr 25, 2008 12:51 am ]
Post subject: 
any help? please
Author:  NOILLUSION [ Fri Apr 25, 2008 1:11 am ]
Post subject: 
have you ever told her your feelings? got rejected or something?

I think, if you love her then tell her. If you don't, you don't. Figure out which it is. But, don't cheat yourself. Always be looking to meet new people and discover new things.

I think, you should just be real and tell her exactly what you posted here:
Quote:
I've tried ignoring her( my record was almost a full week). I've tried fucking/sarging her out of my mind. I've tried being an asshole to her, but nothing seems to work- she over powers me. Every couple of weeks, for 100's of weeks, when i feel like i've had enough (over and over again)
i'll try ignoring her but i always end up back in her clutches because she'll sneak up behind me and give me a big embracing hug, tell me she loves me, sweet talk me or anything of the such that will completely lower my shields and allow her back into my life.
When i be a dick to her, she just walks away to class, and next period she'll return all happy to see me an just give me a cute little face that completely destroys my defenses. THIS GIRL IS THE DEVIL, the sweetest, sexiest, awesome devil i've ever come around.
Tell her that's the reason why you can't be friends anymore, because she's fucking with your mind/emotions and you need to get away for awhile. Tell her you're not angry with her, and that you just need to regain control of your emotions on your own. If she can't understand that, then I would not believe that she is really a nice person.
You're like a freshman in highschool right? Make a deal with her to completely stop talking to each other for a certain period of time, because it seems like you haven't really gotten over this oneitis. Make new friends, join different circles. You need to show her that you're the one in control and you're not afraid to let her go.

Even if you didn't have the problem of this girl in your life, you would still need to join new circles because that's the main problem of trying to go from AFC to PUA in high school, people know you, and it's hard to change the image that people already have of you.

That's all I can think of, sorry if it doesnt help much.
Author:  Method One [ Fri Apr 25, 2008 1:41 am ]
Post subject: 
thanks for helpin me out, but nah i'm a sophomore. She sees me as a bestfriend.. could you handle your bestfriend tellin you he or she can't hang out with you anymore? I know i couldn't and i bet she couldnt either which is why i feel bad. I might tell her my feelings, an that i need a break from her but i just have a bad feeling things arent gonna turn out good.
Author:  joe1 [ Thu Sep 18, 2008 10:26 pm ]
Post subject: 
first of all think of number one which is you.... tell her how you feel and if she is your freind she will understand you.... if you dont you will end up pulling yourself down ...
Author:  Saiko [ Fri Sep 19, 2008 6:22 am ]
Post subject: 
<center>Watch.
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/cEhuRsLy4G0&hl ... ram><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/cEhuRsLy4G0&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>
Author:  TheGunner [ Fri Sep 19, 2008 11:48 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
And i can't get a girlfriend because i haven't been able to allow myself to think there's a better girl out there for me. She always overmatches any other chick.
Believe me, I know how this feels. I'm 24, but I've been in that shape for one and a half years. It's not easy.

It takes time, and it takes girls to get you of this. Just remember to be patient and be open to options.
Author:  Double J [ Sat Sep 20, 2008 5:06 pm ]
Post subject: 
I don't want to come of as a bastard here, especially as I use the screen name valour. However, have you tried the solid once and for all cure to one-ites? Get a girlfriend. Shaging, and sarging does not cure oneitis. having a girlfriend who loves and cares for you a does.

From what you say, you've already sank the ship. so jump the fuck off it. You don't need to cut her out of your life, just don't make her the focus of it. And hell, if you lucky, real lucky, she will see you with you girlfriend, get jealous and start to want you.

p.s If your 16, you shouldent let these problems wrap you in there cold embrace just yet. you have you still have about 21,000 days left to find another "love of your life" so dont stress so much mate :)
Author:  dieselfuel [ Sun Sep 21, 2008 9:51 am ]
Post subject: 
GFTOW. Simple.
Author:  Nutriman [ Sun Sep 21, 2008 10:48 am ]
Post subject: 
agreement here, i have one itis for this girl at the moment and i just told her how i felt, and you know i couldn't care less if she said she wasn't interested. It's just a huge weight lifted off my shoulders now that i've told her
Author:  Mr. Fickle [ Sun Sep 21, 2008 3:22 pm ]
Post subject:  guys
I dont think his age has anything to do with this. he fucking likes a girl his pain is just as bad as a 40 year olds.

my personal opnion. I'd burn that bridge. i'd tell her to fuck off then give her the middle finger for no reason, delete her off my phone, myspace ,facebook and everywhere else she may be found in your life.

or

telling her how you feel is another valid way of dealing with this. a life lived without regrets isnt very much of a life is it?


(rofl leave her better than you found her, so don't burn the bridge.)
Author:  Nutriman [ Sun Sep 21, 2008 10:23 pm ]
Post subject: 
that's true too but seeing though his locker is right next to hers it's gonna make deleting her out his life pretty difficult.
When i did my little thing i just thought is it really worth losing the friendship? and the answer was yes
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/