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| psychological reasons behind oneitis? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=206068 |
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| Author: | thittato [ Mon Aug 07, 2017 5:18 pm ] |
| Post subject: | psychological reasons behind oneitis? |
Some kind of lack in childhood, and when you actually like a girl and get her validation, you get hooked on that? Would appreciate to read more about this stuff? Not from a "how to get the girl" perspective, but more from an inner game perspective |
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| Author: | R.C [ Tue Aug 08, 2017 8:10 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: psychological reasons behind oneitis? |
What lack in childhood are you talk about? Picture you starving, where food is scarce in your life and most restaurants don't want to serve you because you reek of desperation. Then there's one restaurant that kinda lets you sit by the door, tempting you with the smell of food. They don't really have the intention of letting you in, they just like the attention or keep you in limbo. However you don't know that, because they dangle that dish right in your face but barely out of reach. And you are starving, so in your world that dish is the only thing that matters. It's the only option you think you have and for every second you feel you're closer to it, in reality you're just that much further away. That's onitis. Scarcity combined with lack of options. |
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| Author: | thittato [ Wed Aug 09, 2017 7:29 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: psychological reasons behind oneitis? |
Really good analogy of how it feels to have a bad case of oneitis. However, would someone who had the inner game of an alpha-male, (the self-worth, confidence, etc) really ever end up in such a situation? And say this was combined with friendzone. If there was any kind of natural chemistry between the girl and this alpha-male, would he really ever have to do anything to get her except just being him self? And if this girl was not interested would it really be possible for someone with a healthy and balanced self-worth to get a hang-up on her? |
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| Author: | Sonny Lofthus [ Wed Aug 09, 2017 8:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: psychological reasons behind oneitis? |
Quote: What lack in childhood are you talk about?
i feel something like oneitis everytime i start talking about sex, or chatting about sex with some girls... i have this feeling since my last girlfriends used something like forbidden patterns on me(She did it subconsciously,she had a manipulative nature), I did not realize it before.. simply, i have this oneitis feeling anchored with sex ... i dont know why and how it is possible, Its not a problem because I hide it, but its here...
Picture you starving, where food is scarce in your life and most restaurants don't want to serve you because you reek of desperation. Then there's one restaurant that kinda lets you sit by the door, tempting you with the smell of food. They don't really have the intention of letting you in, they just like the attention or keep you in limbo. However you don't know that, because they dangle that dish right in your face but barely out of reach. And you are starving, so in your world that dish is the only thing that matters. It's the only option you think you have and for every second you feel you're closer to it, in reality you're just that much further away. That's onitis. Scarcity combined with lack of options. |
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| Author: | Mr. Assertive [ Thu Aug 10, 2017 1:17 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: psychological reasons behind oneitis? |
Quote: Really good analogy of how it feels to have a bad case of oneitis.
Experience is the best teacher. Someone who has their shit together will know that after the relationship ends, he will be alright. There are other women in the world. Those that lack experience and haven't been in the field/or still have some soul searching to do, will suffer from thinking that particular girl is special. Personally, I have my favorites. When I think that she is turning out to be special, then comes another one that is pretty cool too.
However, would someone who had the inner game of an alpha-male, (the self-worth, confidence, etc) really ever end up in such a situation? And say this was combined with friendzone. If there was any kind of natural chemistry between the girl and this alpha-male, would he really ever have to do anything to get her except just being him self? And if this girl was not interested would it really be possible for someone with a healthy and balanced self-worth to get a hang-up on her? |
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| Author: | R.C [ Thu Aug 10, 2017 7:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: psychological reasons behind oneitis? |
Quote:
However, would someone who had the inner game of an alpha-male, (the self-worth, confidence, etc) really ever end up in such a situation?
I wouldn't say so. A great hunter doesn't go starving, does he?Quote:
And say this was combined with friendzone. If there was any kind of natural chemistry between the girl and this alpha-male, would he really ever have to do anything to get her except just being him self? And if this girl was not interested would it really be possible for someone with a healthy and balanced self-worth to get a hang-up on her?
The guys who end up friendzoning themselves aren't really the ones you can describe as "alpha-males". If you're into a woman you flirt with her. You escalate. You show intent. She either reciprocates and something happens, or things come to a full stop. The limbo that is the friendzone is simply a result of guys playing to not lose, instead of playing to win. |
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