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| Getting 'Fucked Outta It' as a life motto https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=200858 |
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| Author: | ILoveLaura [ Mon Jan 02, 2017 1:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | Getting 'Fucked Outta It' as a life motto |
What's the first rule to remember when you think a bully is getting the better of you? Well I remember a particular pet peeve of mine that made me realise what my own answer to this question was. The person in this story probably wasn't even a bully... but's it's all relative: During a group discussion when it'd come to my in put, I've noticed that a particular auntie would often unnecessarily comment on what I said, or else mimic what I said. Hard to describe, but it seemed patronising. It was as if she was implying that it was rare for me to make a good point, and highlighting that fact rather than addressing the issue being discussed. What's more important though, is because this irritated me, I would often not bother saying many of the things that came to mind, in anticipation of this occurring. It's in situations like these, that you know you'll be made look like an idiot if you speak up. So that's why it took me a while to realise that I should still go right ahead and do or say whatever I would've if that person wasn't around. I would do this even if there was an attractive girl witnessing it, who might witness me getting belittled. What's also interesting, is that mostly this aunty wouldn't even do it most of the time. That's not to say that it was all in my head - it wasn't. And if I told anyone about this, they'd probably say I was all in my head. But by acting this way around her, I learned a bit about how to deal with such people, and the usual tricks they use. So the next time the extended family met, she did get a few comments in at me, which I didn't quite know how to deal with, but at least it didn't take from my momentum. I didn't getting distracted or irritated by it - I ignored it and stayed on topic. Once she witnessed this, she stopped with the heckling, and it never happened again. Of course, if it were a proper cruel bully, it mightn't be enough to stop them. So it's kind of ironic, in that the more I'm being attacked, the better I feel about myself... because I know I'm not being silenced. I used to think of it as "let's do or say this" expecting to be "fucked outta it". Once I could trick myself into thinking that I didn't care what people thought of me, it got easier. However, I might have rebelled a bit too far! Some might be inclined to think that I'm too much of a thrill seeker now, and that's probably why! And it's also good to be aware of who you might subconsciously trying to impress, as a way of trying prevent inevitable social disasters. But all of this is essentially the same thing as why guys are afraid to approach. Yes, you may approach a woman, and for the first second she may think "surely this guy's cool if he has the confidence to approach me like this" and then it could go all down hill from there! - with you not having anything else to say, leaving an awkward silence that many will witness. Would you be okay with that? because that's the question! I think too many dudes give advice such as "oh the worst that could happen is she'll say no" and it's not really true. You have to imagine worst case scenario and be okay with it. Of course, don't view people as the enemy. Sometimes the person you think is an asshole might be quite nice. Try to see the good in people, don't be defensive, blah blah blah. Anyway, I think this motto is would be good for beginners. I imagine it's accounted for in one way or another in PUA lingo, but seems a good way of thinking of it. The auntie is just an example! |
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