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| Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the storm? https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=199318 |
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| Author: | Moscow [ Sun Sep 25, 2016 6:01 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the storm? |
I love my girl to death, would take a bullet for her as Tyler says. Although she's kinda crazy. This week it was my birthday, and all was good until the night before my bday dinner, when my gf of 5 months was supposed to meet my family. Ever since school had started for her, she's been getting depressive spells and also anxiety over not amounting to anything in life. The past few times i have been able to handle it well and calm her down and everything would be okay. She would mention to me how she thinks I need to find a new girlfriend because she is not good enough for me. The night before this dinner she gets a depressive spell that mixed in with her period and she just became inconsolable, she kept telling me how we should breakup for my own good because I deserve better and that she would drag me down (she never has actually ragged me down in terms of success and this girl actually inspires me in a lot of ways), she tells me she can't go to my bday dinner. She texts me yesterday right before the dinner telling me to have a good birthday dinner and she tells me about some yt video she watched last week and links it to me (trying to pretend like nothing happened the other night?). I ignore the video part and give her a last chance to come to the dinner. All she says is "Im sorry". I don't respond and continue my day without her. There's no doubt she did me wrong for the bday. If she can't apologize to me in a way that shows me she cares then I'm definitely dumping her. But let's suppose she apologizes and explains she was feeling too depressed to do anything, Does she want comfort and reassurance from me through this dark time in her life? I can provide it to her, I love her, but at times it takes a toll on me. All weekend, and even now I'm feeling bummed out and anxious about her. These sort of psychotic episodes happen every few weeks with her, but they never amount to arguments....we both are very very good at handling our differences and conflicts. So does, she want me stay and just ride the wave out and see wht happens in the relationship? Doing this I feel like makes me a really ood boyfriend. Or, do I dump the girl I still really love? If i dump her, I won't be bitter about it and would like to support her in any way I could emotionally. Hopefully turn her into a fwb, although I'm not sure if that's a good idea or even possible. Stay with her, be her rock in the storm, ride out the wave and see what happens? OR Dump her asap? I'm completely torn, please weigh in |
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| Author: | kidfromcro [ Sun Sep 25, 2016 6:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
my ex girlfriend used to be something similar in behavior before we broke up,not showing up on our birthday,we"re both born at the same date,not showing up,fucked up mentally,came to sleep over less then before,and a big one,cheated,so dumped,not saying that"s the case with your girlfriend,but it was with mine,btw happy birthday |
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| Author: | Mr. Assertive [ Sun Sep 25, 2016 8:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
She should get professional help. I don't think a boyfriend is the answer to her problems. Id stick to Communication for now and see if things turn up. We all go through bad spots so it would be a little trigger happy if we just up and go. See if you can work it out and if you can't then let the pieces fall where they may |
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| Author: | Wesley [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 5:04 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Dude it's only been 5 months, love that's strong |
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| Author: | R.C [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 6:41 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Stop dating losers. |
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| Author: | Arch Stanton [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 8:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Her "psychotic glitches" sound like normal cyclic female behavior to me. It's only been five months. Tell her she stung you with the birthday blowoff. But don't cry about. Just tell her you have standards for the people in your life. And you expect more self awareness from her in the future. Then move on. |
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| Author: | R.C [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 8:10 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
If he had standards he wouldn't be dating that kind of woman. Honestly Arch, "normal cyclic female behavior"? |
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| Author: | Arch Stanton [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 8:48 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Pretty much. 80% of women have quasi-predictable cyclic mood swings...especially if they're hotter. Seems normal to me. |
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| Author: | R.C [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 10:29 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Quote:
Ever since school had started for her, she's been getting depressive spells and also anxiety over not amounting to anything in life.
Quote:
She would mention to me how she thinks I need to find a new girlfriend because she is not good enough for me.
Quote:
she kept telling me how we should breakup for my own good because I deserve better and that she would drag me down (she never has actually ragged me down in terms of success and this girl actually inspires me in a lot of ways), she tells me she can't go to my bday dinner.
Does this sound like a "normal" girl? She's either not taking the relationship seriously enough to meet parents and is probably looking for an upgrade, if she hasn't found him already. or She's immensely insecure and has no sense of selfworth nor selfesteem. Either way those aren't mood swings. They're red flags. I see no valid reason to give the girlfriend title to someone like that. |
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| Author: | HT23VWY67 [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 12:07 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
She probably has self-esteem issues. If you really love and care for her, find a good shrink for her if she is reluctant. Encourage her to pursue psychotherapy. Work out together. That boosts mood. |
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| Author: | Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 2:34 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Stop making excuses for her, it's not your job to fix her. |
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| Author: | neo87 [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 2:41 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
I think you're both kinda crazy tbh. You're with a chick who is telling you don't be with her. And you'd take a bullet for a chick who wouldn't even come to your bday dinner? Sure there are crazy people out there.. But the people who fight for these crazy people are crazier imo And what rc said |
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| Author: | Arch Stanton [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 11:25 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Quote:
Ever since school had started for her, she's been getting depressive spells and also anxiety over not amounting to anything in life.
Normal 19-25 year old female behavior.Quote:
She would mention to me how she thinks I need to find a new girlfriend because she is not good enough for me.
Insecure spells. Normal, attractive 19-25 female behavior. Quote:
she kept telling me how we should breakup for my own good because I deserve better and that she would drag me down (she never has actually ragged me down in terms of success and this girl actually inspires me in a lot of ways), she tells me she can't go to my bday dinner.
She fucked up there. Quote: Does this sound like a "normal" girl?
Yep.Quote:
She's either not taking the relationship seriously enough to meet parents and is probably looking for an upgrade, if she hasn't found him already.
I've had a lot of experience with women...to the point where I'm 40 and only date 20-somethings. This is all normal shit. And I'm very, very chill, to the point where I get invited out to girls nights, etc with my gf. They often speak of "marriage material" about all of the guys that they're with, FWB or serious. A woman knows right away if you are someone she could potentially marry. 9-10 Women are ALWAYS evaluating and looking at potential upgrades ( not always acting, but they have severe abundance mentality). They ESPECIALLY go into evaluation mode when the man in their life is not showing up emotionally centered. The sooner men learn this about women, the less they call their ex gf's "crazy" and the more they call them "Just like a woman". Thanks Bob Dylan, lol. IMHO, women are more intelligent than men on the whole, and better multitaskers. But they're a bit unstable, and need time to sort through their moods in their heads....especially hot ones. Give space for them to unscramble, show up emotionally centered and as the fun guy (not the whiny bitch and excessive texter), and you have the woman for a long, long time if you want. |
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| Author: | JackZero [ Mon Sep 26, 2016 11:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Quote: I've had a lot of experience with women...to the point where I'm 40 and only date 20-somethings. This is all normal shit. And I'm very, very chill, to the point where I get invited out to girls nights, etc with my gf. They often speak of "marriage material" about all of the guys that they're with, FWB or serious. I don't get it Arch...I really don't. I tend to date women in their 20's and 30's as well and this isn't normal behavior. I date some seriously beautiful women too. A lot of the quality posters here are in their 20's and date some very hot women that are their age and don't get this type of behavior from them. I get that you like to lump 9's and 10's in a category of "they are all like this", but that's not reality especially since we know you have a strict filter for how a woman should perform on a first date. Limiting yourself to certain types of women limits your perspective of women.
A woman knows right away if you are someone she could potentially marry. 9-10 Women are ALWAYS evaluating and looking at potential upgrades ( not always acting, but they have severe abundance mentality). They ESPECIALLY go into evaluation mode when the man in their life is not showing up emotionally centered. The sooner men learn this about women, the less they call their ex gf's "crazy" and the more they call them "Just like a woman". Thanks Bob Dylan, lol. IMHO, women are more intelligent than men on the whole, and better multitaskers. But they're a bit unstable, and need time to sort through their moods in their heads....especially hot ones. Give space for them to unscramble, show up emotionally centered and as the fun guy (not the whiny bitch and excessive texter), and you have the woman for a long, long time if you want. |
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| Author: | neo87 [ Tue Sep 27, 2016 12:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Is it time to dump my GF or do I be the rock in the stor |
Quote: Quote:
Ever since school had started for her, she's been getting depressive spells and also anxiety over not amounting to anything in life.
Normal 19-25 year old female behavior.Quote:
She would mention to me how she thinks I need to find a new girlfriend because she is not good enough for me.
Insecure spells. Normal, attractive 19-25 female behavior. Quote:
she kept telling me how we should breakup for my own good because I deserve better and that she would drag me down (she never has actually ragged me down in terms of success and this girl actually inspires me in a lot of ways), she tells me she can't go to my bday dinner.
She fucked up there. Quote: Does this sound like a "normal" girl?
Yep.Quote:
She's either not taking the relationship seriously enough to meet parents and is probably looking for an upgrade, if she hasn't found him already.
I've had a lot of experience with women...to the point where I'm 40 and only date 20-somethings. This is all normal shit. And I'm very, very chill, to the point where I get invited out to girls nights, etc with my gf. They often speak of "marriage material" about all of the guys that they're with, FWB or serious. A woman knows right away if you are someone she could potentially marry. 9-10 Women are ALWAYS evaluating and looking at potential upgrades ( not always acting, but they have severe abundance mentality). They ESPECIALLY go into evaluation mode when the man in their life is not showing up emotionally centered. The sooner men learn this about women, the less they call their ex gf's "crazy" and the more they call them "Just like a woman". Thanks Bob Dylan, lol. IMHO, women are more intelligent than men on the whole, and better multitaskers. But they're a bit unstable, and need time to sort through their moods in their heads....especially hot ones. Give space for them to unscramble, show up emotionally centered and as the fun guy (not the whiny bitch and excessive texter), and you have the woman for a long, long time if you want. A chick that should be on Prozac is normal? I'm sorry, but if she is repeatedly going through a level of anxiety and depression where she cant leave the house then thats not NORMAL. ESPECIALLY for your BIRTHDAY? AND its not over something like her parent died, or she didnt get into the college she wanted, or the final is stressing her out (school JUST started)...just regular life is so troubling for her she has psyshotic episodes...I'm sorry but what is normal about this? I mean, does the chick have to hang herself to be "crazy"? |
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