PUA Forum :: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the gym

Approached her in the gym this morning, spoke briefly about gym stuff....I left her get on with her workout, she said "Nice to meet you" and that was it....so how many (brief) convo's should I have before asking her out? I just don't want to appear too keen....

I think the case against showing interest too soon is basically trying to avoid her thinking that you're overeager to just casually sleep with her, which would put most girls on the defensive. Soon is good, but "too soon" is a very real problem, if you ask me.

The problem with the friendly guy is when he turns into interested/sexual guy, it's like dropping a bomb on her because whether or not she knew he was interested, she'll say that she thought you and her were more friends and that will be because you didn't express any interest or intent.

Quote:

This is absolutely, 100% spot on. And they will think you are a creepy sneak with no confidence. I cannot emphasize just how true this is.

Attractive women can have sex with who they want, when they want. Men who dither (hesitation and lack of confidence translates to the bedroom, too) are tossed aside like nothing.

The gym is a tricky place.

But I have some bad news for you. You should've asked her out on the first approach. I was talking with two women the other day who hate it, and I mean *hate* it when a guy putzes around and isn't concise and direct right away. They see it as weakness. Now, if you continue to approach her without being confident, you look stalkerish. It sucks dude, but it's true. You've got one more approach, and this time get right to the fucking point.

Too many times guys here make it sound like a girl snaps her fingers and the guy of her dreams is there, willing.

Not true if you have female friends and have had these kinda conversations u'd hear about their frustrations in attracting guys they find appealing.

Quote:

Too many times guys here make it sound like a girl snaps her fingers and the guy of her dreams is there, willing.

Come on man, that's not what I said.

Quote:

Not true if you have female friends and have had these kinda conversations u'd hear about their frustrations in attracting guys they find appealing.

You hear this, and you hear what I described as well. You enjoy playing devil's advocate. Waste of time, IMHO. I'd rather be with a woman.

It's only too soon if the feeling of interest isn't reciprocated.

Quote:

It's only too soon if the feeling of interest isn't reciprocated.

And it could very well take a while for that feeling of interest to pop up in her, right?

Author:	Ricardo999 [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:03 pm ]
Post subject:	How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the gym
Approached her in the gym this morning, spoke briefly about gym stuff....I left her get on with her workout, she said "Nice to meet you" and that was it....so how many (brief) convo's should I have before asking her out? I just don't want to appear too keen....

Author:	Arch Stanton [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:09 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
The gym is a tricky place. But I have some bad news for you. You should've asked her out on the first approach. I was talking with two women the other day who hate it, and I mean hate it when a guy putzes around and isn't concise and direct right away. They see it as weakness. Now, if you continue to approach her without being confident, you look stalkerish. It sucks dude, but it's true. You've got one more approach, and this time get right to the fucking point.

Author:	JackZero [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:16 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: Approached her in the gym this morning, spoke briefly about gym stuff....I left her get on with her workout, she said "Nice to meet you" and that was it....so how many (brief) convo's should I have before asking her out? I just don't want to appear too keen.... It always puzzles me when guys approach a girl but don't want to show that they are interested. You are being the "friendly" guy as opposed to the guy that she will want to have sex with. The problem with the friendly guy is when he turns into interested/sexual guy, it's like dropping a bomb on her because whether or not she knew he was interested, she'll say that she thought you and her were more friends and that will be because you didn't express any interest or intent. How long do you wait? You don't. You show interest and if she's receptive, you ask her out.

Author:	Autoregressive [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:24 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
I think the case against showing interest too soon is basically trying to avoid her thinking that you're overeager to just casually sleep with her, which would put most girls on the defensive. Soon is good, but "too soon" is a very real problem, if you ask me.

Author:	JackZero [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:31 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: I think the case against showing interest too soon is basically trying to avoid her thinking that you're overeager to just casually sleep with her, which would put most girls on the defensive. Soon is good, but "too soon" is a very real problem, if you ask me. It's only too soon if the feeling of interest isn't reciprocated.

PUA Forum https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the gym https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=198259	Page 1 of 2

Author:	Arch Stanton [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:36 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: The problem with the friendly guy is when he turns into interested/sexual guy, it's like dropping a bomb on her because whether or not she knew he was interested, she'll say that she thought you and her were more friends and that will be because you didn't express any interest or intent. This is absolutely, 100% spot on. And they will think you are a creepy sneak with no confidence. I cannot emphasize just how true this is. Attractive women can have sex with who they want, when they want. Men who dither (hesitation and lack of confidence translates to the bedroom, too) are tossed aside like nothing.

Author:	n2thevoid [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:50 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
I've lots of experience with gym bunnys. Careful some of them are real nuts like my ex (switched gyms because of her, and still her crazy ass followed). That said, fly under the radar don't make overt moves initially. Work in a set with her, build rapport and often times its easy enough to invite them to train with you. Lots of opportunity to make it sexual with subtle touching etc. I wouldn't wait long however, get them out the gym quick like suggest going for a healthy meal or something and then run it like u would regular game.

Author:	n2thevoid [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 8:52 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: Quote: The problem with the friendly guy is when he turns into interested/sexual guy, it's like dropping a bomb on her because whether or not she knew he was interested, she'll say that she thought you and her were more friends and that will be because you didn't express any interest or intent. This is absolutely, 100% spot on. And they will think you are a creepy sneak with no confidence. I cannot emphasize just how true this is. Attractive women can have sex with who they want, when they want. Men who dither (hesitation and lack of confidence translates to the bedroom, too) are tossed aside like nothing. Not true at all. Attraction is often times subjective, the guy they want to have sex with is the guy that's not necessarily available or even interested. Too many times guys here make it sound like a girl snaps her fingers and the guy of her dreams is there, willing. Not true if you have female friends and have had these kinda conversations u'd hear about their frustrations in attracting guys they find appealing. That said attraction for women works quite differently than that of males but thats a whole other conversation.

Author:	Ricardo999 [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 9:14 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: The gym is a tricky place. But I have some bad news for you. You should've asked her out on the first approach. I was talking with two women the other day who hate it, and I mean hate it when a guy putzes around and isn't concise and direct right away. They see it as weakness. Now, if you continue to approach her without being confident, you look stalkerish. It sucks dude, but it's true. You've got one more approach, and this time get right to the fucking point. I hear what you are saying....but tbh the convo was very natural, I felt relaxed, no awkwardness.....however she told me she trains at 7am in the week so on my next day off (next Mon) I will train then and simply ask her out. No messing, I will get straight to the point.

Author:	Arch Stanton [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 9:16 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: Too many times guys here make it sound like a girl snaps her fingers and the guy of her dreams is there, willing. Come on man, that's not what I said. Quote: Not true if you have female friends and have had these kinda conversations u'd hear about their frustrations in attracting guys they find appealing. You hear this, and you hear what I described as well. You enjoy playing devil's advocate. Waste of time, IMHO. I'd rather be with a woman.

Author:	n2thevoid [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 9:36 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: Quote: Too many times guys here make it sound like a girl snaps her fingers and the guy of her dreams is there, willing. Come on man, that's not what I said. Quote: Not true if you have female friends and have had these kinda conversations u'd hear about their frustrations in attracting guys they find appealing. You hear this, and you hear what I described as well. You enjoy playing devil's advocate. Waste of time, IMHO. I'd rather be with a woman. Not sure if what you categorize as a "woman" truly is, you've yet to product a photo as proof of your '9'.

Author:	Jay (Majik) [ Sun Jul 24, 2016 10:09 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
You can go as fast or as slow as you'd like as far as "making moves" but you need to show clear interest and sexual intention from the jump. If you're showing intent, she's either going to like it and stick around or get creeped out and leave. Either way, you're not stuck in the friend zone or with the girl asking "so are you trying to sell me something?"

Author:	Autoregressive [ Mon Jul 25, 2016 4:07 am ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: It's only too soon if the feeling of interest isn't reciprocated. And it could very well take a while for that feeling of interest to pop up in her, right?

Author:	JackZero [ Mon Jul 25, 2016 4:14 am ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Quote: Quote: It's only too soon if the feeling of interest isn't reciprocated. And it could very well take a while for that feeling of interest to pop up in her, right? I didn't suggest otherwise.

Page 1 of 2	All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/

Author:	Eddie Fews [ Tue Jul 26, 2016 12:23 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: How long do you leave it before asking a girl out in the
Why not just ask out to find out? And then come to us and say whether or not you did it too soon. Or don't come to us at all because it went well. Starting a conversation with a stranger is much tougher than asking for their phone number once you do.