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| Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=195776 |
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| Author: | alejandroestrada [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 3:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
I have started a profile on okcupid and messaged a few girls. Just so you know, I am on my phone, not the website. Not that it matters. First of all, the reply rate is very low. But I understand that's normal. But my problem is even the ones that respond, the conversation doesn't keep going, unless I end every message with a question mark. If I don't end a message with a question mark, the girl doesn't bother replying back. For example, today I messaged this girl that I had a lot in common with. I have seen 100 profiles and didn't like any of them. This girl I really liked her personality. I told her in my message some of the things I found interesting in her profile and could identify with. I told her I liked the fact that she was intelligent. I told her I liked the fact that she hates bars and clubs. She replied back "Finally someone that understands me." I replied back "We are a match. But first things first. If our first child is a son, what do we name him?" She replied back with a witty comment that surprised me and confirmed to me even more that we are a match. I wrote back "so not only агe you intelligent, you'гe also witty." She never wrote back (should she have?) This happens all the time. They won't continue the conversation. I don't know if I am doing something wrong in the conversation, or if they are just not interested in me. In these situations, should I follow up? If yes, how? |
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| Author: | Jay Lay [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 6:13 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
You basically answered your own question. You said you only get responses when you end things with a question mark, so keep doing that. First of all, girls like it when you ask questions. It shows that you're interested and curious. Second of all, it's sometimes hard to reply to a comment. Like, what the hell would someone say to that last message you sent, the thing about being witty. Youre really not giving that much for people to work with. Start asking questions, and telling the person a bit about yourself in the process. You don't have to make it long, but make it a bit more substantial. If you really like the person and are still thinking of her, then follow up. Worst thing that can happen is she won't respond. But why don't you ask her something about her interests? |
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| Author: | alejandroestrada [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 6:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Jay, Thanks. That's what I was thinking too, what the hell is she supposed to say. But there are 3 reasons why I wasn't asking questions. 1) When I ask all the questions, I will come off desperate, no? I just feel weird asking question after question after question and her not reciprocating. Is it the man's role to ask the questions and the woman's role to answer them? So the man shows interest by asking questions. How will the woman show interest? 2) it's too predictable. She will know "in his next message, he will ask a question again." 3) I wanted to test her interest and see if I don't ask anything and leave just a comment, will she reinitiate and try to get me to talk? or will she disappear? I wanted to test how interested she is in me. Yes, I really like her. She has a lot of traits that I like, AND in what she is looking for in a guy, she has a lot of traits listed that I have. Her profile is pretty complete, I would look stupid if I ask about her interests because it's all listed there. |
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| Author: | R.C [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 8:50 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Online success is based on conversational skills and the way you present your profile (pics, bio). |
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| Author: | Onoma [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 12:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Quote: I would look stupid if I ask about her interests because it's all listed there.
He didn't say ask what her interests are, he said ask about the interests. Presumably you have some in common, you should be able to talk about those in depth right? Like if you both like to travel you could ask her favorite destination and what she likes about it.
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| Author: | Jay Lay [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 2:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
You don't have to ask question after question after question. Would you do that in a normal conversation? If you did that it would sound like an interview. Try to get a conversational rhythm going. You could tell a funny anectode about you, or talk about a funny experience, it doesn't even have to necessarily relate to her profile, though that might help spark something in the conversation. If you have music tastes in common, you could share a link to a music video or whatever. Then ask a question. Again, it doesn't have to be super long. Think about good conversations you have with people and what those consist of. Start paying closer attention to people who are good conversationalists and take note of what they do and how they keep the conversation going. If you want to try something out on here, let me know and I will help you out with it. |
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| Author: | Heywood Jablowme [ Thu Mar 24, 2016 2:42 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Pretend your talking to your bratty kid sister you haven't seen since Christmas. It's not a job interview, it's a connection. |
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| Author: | chrisnos [ Mon Mar 28, 2016 4:36 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Tell them you have a net worth of over $1 million. You'll get so many replies your head will spin, and this is based on experience. |
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| Author: | Reaver4k [ Thu Mar 31, 2016 2:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Online dating is horrible, don't do it, it will eat away at your soul. Women get around 50-60 messages a day, even more if their profile is new and they are somewhat good looking. When I did online dating I would have to message about 100 girls to get 4 or 5 replys, and most of the conversations would die out after 2 or 3 messages. I got about 3 or 4 dates over 3 years out of online dating, after messages over 3000 women. Its also hard to show confidence and positive body language online as well, and you can't do kino or any other seduction stuff as well. Also women online are more likely to nit pick through stuff like your education, job and wealth and social status, where as in person you can by-pass all that. |
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| Author: | neo87 [ Thu Mar 31, 2016 4:21 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Quote: Online dating is horrible, don't do it, it will eat away at your soul.
Women get around 50-60 messages a day, even more if their profile is new and they are somewhat good looking. When I did online dating I would have to message about 100 girls to get 4 or 5 replys, and most of the conversations would die out after 2 or 3 messages. I got about 3 or 4 dates over 3 years out of online dating, after messages over 3000 women. Its also hard to show confidence and positive body language online as well, and you can't do kino or any other seduction stuff as well. Also women online are more likely to nit pick through stuff like your education, job and wealth and social status, where as in person you can by-pass all that. That's more a reflection that you were horrible at online dating no offense. If you know what you're doing you can easily get 3 dates per week minimum online. As always online should be a supplement to in person gaming but don't scare the guy off from something because it didn't work for you. 3 dates in 3 years means you really did something wrong.. That's not typical even for average guys. |
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| Author: | Reaver4k [ Mon Apr 04, 2016 12:07 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Quote: Quote: Online dating is horrible, don't do it, it will eat away at your soul.
Women get around 50-60 messages a day, even more if their profile is new and they are somewhat good looking. When I did online dating I would have to message about 100 girls to get 4 or 5 replys, and most of the conversations would die out after 2 or 3 messages. I got about 3 or 4 dates over 3 years out of online dating, after messages over 3000 women. Its also hard to show confidence and positive body language online as well, and you can't do kino or any other seduction stuff as well. Also women online are more likely to nit pick through stuff like your education, job and wealth and social status, where as in person you can by-pass all that. That's more a reflection that you were horrible at online dating no offense. If you know what you're doing you can easily get 3 dates per week minimum online. As always online should be a supplement to in person gaming but don't scare the guy off from something because it didn't work for you. 3 dates in 3 years means you really did something wrong.. That's not typical even for average guys. |
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| Author: | Jay (Majik) [ Mon Apr 04, 2016 7:56 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
You need to go get a sales job for a few years. Face to face. Professional sales. Not a clerk at a grocery store or something. Learn how to talk to people efficiently and effectively. Your communication skills suck. You can't learn it from a book... |
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| Author: | Versalis [ Mon Apr 11, 2016 4:26 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
You're not trying to get into lengthy discussions anyway. If she replies it's a good sign. I don't think there's much point in going beyond a few messages. Just drop your number and ask for hers. If she's replying, she probably likes your pictures. If she goes cold after you ask for her number on message #5, odds are, she wasn't going to meet you even if you kept things interesting through message #18. |
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| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Mon Apr 11, 2016 10:31 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Girls on okcupid won't continue conversations |
Go out approaching women in real life and see how low the response rate is.. Now imagine you went out approaching a woman that 15 other men all approached at the same time that you did. And that all of you guys were saying your best lines at the same exact time trying to grab her attention. And then that you approached 20 women a day and this same exact scenario repeated itself with each woman you approached? Mix that with average "forum poster" social skills and how many of the conversations do you think will fall flat between you in a woman that listening to 15 other guys try and have a conversation with her at the same time? Thats what you have with online dating. You improve your odds with higher quality photos, and a quality written profile(especially on okcupid), but even then the response rate won't be miraculous. Invest little to nothing, until the conversation is flowing. Skip reading the profiles. Grab a catchy one liner, spam it to the girls you find attractive, and only read their profiles and talk about them after 2-4 messages. Get the ball rolling first or you'll be wasting unnecessary time and energy. |
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