PUA Forum :: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?

I am not sure if "stubborn" is the right word...I am pretty sure it is not but I don't know the right word.

but here is the thing. Whenever I tell myself to do something, I do the opposite.

Example: sometimes i do interpreting for medical appointments. so I am supposed to be professional. I tell myself "don't talk to that girl. Here, you're supposed to be professional. don't talk to her. don't talk to her" but then I go and talk to her and start flirting with her.
in situations that I should talk to a girl, I won't do it.

another example: I did a translation for this woman and I did it wrong and it got rejected. 100% my fault. it was a huge hassle for her because she picked it up again and I accidentally attached the wrong thing and it got rejected again. The third time she comes, I wanted to look sorry because I didnt want her to think I am taking her situation lightly. so I tell myself "dont smile. dont smile" but as soon as she comes in, I have the biggest smile on my face, like almost laughing.

in summary: if I tell myself to do something, I won't do it. If I tell myself to not do something, I do it.

Is it just me or is everyone like this?

What you are describing is the lack of self discipline.

lack of self-discipline?

but I always thought I am the most self-disciplined person in the world. I am very hard on myself and cannot accept less than perfection. also for example in high school I would study for hours and hours while others were horsing around.

honestly this is a little shocking to me. Not that I don't believe you, since everybody here is saying it, there must be some truth to it. how am I lacking self discipline? I dont get it?

Author:	bartm [ Sun Mar 06, 2016 2:26 am ]
Post subject:	is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
I am not sure if "stubborn" is the right word...I am pretty sure it is not but I don't know the right word. but here is the thing. Whenever I tell myself to do something, I do the opposite. Example: sometimes i do interpreting for medical appointments. so I am supposed to be professional. I tell myself "don't talk to that girl. Here, you're supposed to be professional. don't talk to her. don't talk to her" but then I go and talk to her and start flirting with her. in situations that I should talk to a girl, I won't do it. another example: I did a translation for this woman and I did it wrong and it got rejected. 100% my fault. it was a huge hassle for her because she picked it up again and I accidentally attached the wrong thing and it got rejected again. The third time she comes, I wanted to look sorry because I didnt want her to think I am taking her situation lightly. so I tell myself "dont smile. dont smile" but as soon as she comes in, I have the biggest smile on my face, like almost laughing. in summary: if I tell myself to do something, I won't do it. If I tell myself to not do something, I do it. Is it just me or is everyone like this?

Author:	Mr. Assertive [ Sun Mar 06, 2016 4:01 am ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
No idea bro. I am curious to google this though...

Author:	Crypton [ Sun Mar 06, 2016 10:00 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
Quote: I am not sure if "stubborn" is the right word...I am pretty sure it is not but I don't know the right word. but here is the thing. Whenever I tell myself to do something, I do the opposite. Example: sometimes i do interpreting for medical appointments. so I am supposed to be professional. I tell myself "don't talk to that girl. Here, you're supposed to be professional. don't talk to her. don't talk to her" but then I go and talk to her and start flirting with her. in situations that I should talk to a girl, I won't do it. another example: I did a translation for this woman and I did it wrong and it got rejected. 100% my fault. it was a huge hassle for her because she picked it up again and I accidentally attached the wrong thing and it got rejected again. The third time she comes, I wanted to look sorry because I didnt want her to think I am taking her situation lightly. so I tell myself "dont smile. dont smile" but as soon as she comes in, I have the biggest smile on my face, like almost laughing. in summary: if I tell myself to do something, I won't do it. If I tell myself to not do something, I do it. Is it just me or is everyone like this? Maybe you just do what you want to do, not that people are necessarily "stubborn". I would assume that the fact that you have to tell yourself you "Should" or "Shouldn't" do something, is evidence that you are fighting your natural urge to do it. So you just default to the primary behavior that made you start telling yourself you should do the opposite. Basically, you are just trying to convince yourself to do the opposite of what you want, but what you WANT, tends to win.

Author:	JackZero [ Sun Mar 06, 2016 10:22 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
What you are describing is the lack of self discipline.

Author:	Mr. Assertive [ Sun Mar 06, 2016 11:02 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
Haha, oh yeah you're right ^ .

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Author:	R.C [ Mon Mar 07, 2016 7:47 am ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
Quote: What you are describing is the lack of self discipline. Yes, this.

Author:	coeywong88 [ Mon Mar 07, 2016 7:50 am ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
i just thinking what you are meaning..

Author:	bartm [ Tue Mar 08, 2016 5:49 am ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
lack of self-discipline? but I always thought I am the most self-disciplined person in the world. I am very hard on myself and cannot accept less than perfection. also for example in high school I would study for hours and hours while others were horsing around. honestly this is a little shocking to me. Not that I don't believe you, since everybody here is saying it, there must be some truth to it. how am I lacking self discipline? I dont get it?

Author:	JackZero [ Tue Mar 08, 2016 6:49 am ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
Quote: lack of self-discipline? but I always thought I am the most self-disciplined person in the world. I am very hard on myself and cannot accept less than perfection. also for example in high school I would study for hours and hours while others were horsing around. honestly this is a little shocking to me. Not that I don't believe you, since everybody here is saying it, there must be some truth to it. how am I lacking self discipline? I dont get it? When you were a kid and your parents said not to do something and you did it, they would discipline you until you learned to follow their rules. You're an adult now and you are not following your own rules that you give yourself. You lack self discipline.

Author:	R.C [ Tue Mar 08, 2016 9:17 am ]
Post subject:	Re: is it just me or are humans naturally stubborn?
Quote: lack of self-discipline? but I always thought I am the most self-disciplined person in the world. I am very hard on myself and cannot accept less than perfection. also for example in high school I would study for hours and hours while others were horsing around. honestly this is a little shocking to me. Not that I don't believe you, since everybody here is saying it, there must be some truth to it. how am I lacking self discipline? I dont get it? Being hard on yourself has nothing to do with self discipline. Being dedicated to yourself does.

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