By the looks of it you're being a reactive. It's good how you set boundaries about what you will and what you won't take, but women, and anyone for that matter do not take well to being reprimanded. You could have taken a more centered position towards her flakey behavior rather than hanging up on her, telling her how angry you are with her etc - this shows over-investment on your part. You've hungout 6x and you're acting this way. I'm not saying you weren't justified in being a bit upset over being flaked on twice, but really you got a bit punitive about it and probably conditioned her from having positive feelings linked to you - formerly seeing you as the fun guy who she'd hangout with, have fun, and hookup with, to now associating negative feelings towards you.

If you remained more grounded in your responses to her behavior you wouldn't have felt a need to apologize over calling your conversation short with her (a 'chick' move tbh). I'm not sure I'd call the second thing a flake as she did want you to join her and her friend, sometimes there are extenuating circumstances - a grounded guy would tell her to go do her thing with her friend was in town and hadn't seen her in years.

Go quiet for a bit (unless she makes first contact). Give a few days a week, and reach-out to her if you want at that point with something light and airy DO NOT go reference what happened.

That said, given her patterns is this a girl you want to invest in more? She just may not be the right fit for you.

Wow very informative. I am over invested now that I think about it. It is the phone calls every day that did me in and the sex is/was dynamite. I have other girls I talk to but it is maybe once a week if that. You are right hanging up was a total chick move I was exhausted and it just set me off but that is no excuse. Please elaborate on a taking a "centered position". Interesting you wouldn't call the second thing a flake and I guess I need to be more understanding. What do you suggest I do if she calls me? Obviously I will not bring up the situation. Thank man you really made me realize one main thing, I was over invested.

Being "centered" or "grounded" isn't something you can automatically become until you learn the power of presence. Presence means recognizing when you're being carried away by your thoughts and feelings rather than becoming the "The Watcher of the Mind"; imagine standing outside your mind so-to-speak and simply watching the thoughts go by like leaves floating down a stream - this way you aren't identifying with any particular thought, instead you're simply acknowledge their presence and letting them be. Or, if you'd rather see it on a more scientific level; you got your raw sensory modalities - your hearing, touch, site etc... all of these are coloured by your biases, the lens to which you see the world and sometimes that lens can be coloured in a way that isn't helpful for getting our needs met. The lens was created unconsciously through our environments and introjections (e.g., internalized beliefs from patterns of behavior learned as children).

When you REACT your limbic brain has essentially hijacked your prefrontal cortex - the area of your brain responsible for making rational decisions and judgments among other things. You've got basically a fraction of a second to short-circuit the process as the limbic/reptilian brain kicks in much faster.

So while you can remind yourself when you're not being present (which is actually presence itself), often times u'll find yourself in the undertow of the stream of thoughts (judgments, evaluations, etc of things and events).

The best way, for me at least, to prevent this from happening, or at least minimizing it from happening is through daily meditation. There is a lot of science coming forth in support of this, so it's not some hocus pockus new age crap - in fact the Bhuddists and Taoists have known about it for centuries.

Mindfulness Gurus such as Eckhart Tolle will talk about it in terms of "unconscious" vs "conscious" - unconsciousness meaning you're a slave to your mind - it rules you, you're stuck in thoughts of past and an unrealized future as though it were your identity, and the associated feelings. Consciousness being presence - when you're completely presence, as most of us have been for fleeting moments throughout our lives - there is actually no thought at all, it is the SPACE between thought - you are presence, you are consciousness and it dissolves any identification with external form. I am probably sounding a bit abstract so I'm going to stop here.

So if you want to truly become more present/more "conscious" then I would start with some sort of meditation. It can be as short as 3 minutes, and as long as you want really. Or, it may be the checking in with yourself throughout the day with a cueing question such as "What is going on within me right now?" - the point of such a question is to bring consciousness into your body so you aren't stuck in your mind. People who are stuck in their mind are readily identifiable as they get caught-up in the minutia of things, they get paralyzed by a constant stream of thought and rather than using their mind as a problem-solving tool and knowing WHEN to shut it off, they let the mind keep going and they are never truly present/conscious.

I am starting a new company

That sentence literally defines what I a going through every day lately. I have never meditated nor do I know how. I am going to do some research now and try that out. This site has blown my mind and opened up my eyes. Great advice sir.

'Centered position' just means you should be grounded in who you are as a person ie great catch and not be so reactive to her little 'games' or flaking.

Would a valuable male that has other girls/is going places in life be upset if 1 girl stood him up? No. Neither should you.