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| Author: | Dorian_Gray [ Fri Jul 10, 2015 9:41 am ] |
| Post subject: | Pick up hired gun |
I frequent a bar where I live. One of the servers there, I'd say she's a HB9/10 always seems to check me out and stare at me, in a very obvious way (its strange because girls usually don't get caught doing this), this might have happened almost 7 or 8 visits and she was doing it again tonight. I'd chatted to her breifly once before but decided this had been going on for months so I just said something. Decided to just go direct and call her out, becasue I do it to regular girls in bars and it works. Me: "Why do you always stare at me?" Her: *Kind of caught off guard* "No I don't!?!?" Me: *laughing* "Yeah you do, you always check me out…" Her: *very, very defensive* "No, I DONT???" She went to turn around and I guess I touched her arm because I was still giving her the whole "come on its ok, don't lie" kinda vibe, and she got mad and said "don't grab me and stormed off" I just carried on my night making sure I looked unaffected and was laughing and joking with my friends. She pretty much hid in the corner the whole night. Personally I think she was caught off guard and didn't know how to react except for avoiding the confrontation/uncomfortableness… but how do you think this played out for me in the long run? do you think the direct confidence would add to attraction or has the kind of negative interaction put her in a position where she has to keep pretending she wasn't into me to save face? Whats next? |
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| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Fri Jul 10, 2015 10:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Pick up hired gun |
There is where assuming attraction can take a little turn. Its great to assume women are into you, but you also have to be self aware enough to know when to take a step forward and/or a step backward. Its quote possible that she may have been starring at you, but from the moment you approached, and in the manner you approached it clearly appears that it didn't have the impact you intended for it have. Women are creatures of the moment, they can like you today and then be completely turned off by something you say or a frame/manner in which you project yourself 30 seconds later. I'd definitely pull back and just let her be for now. There are probably plenty of other chicks in that local setting for you to talk to. |
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| Author: | Dorian_Gray [ Fri Jul 10, 2015 3:52 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Pick up hired gun |
Quote: There is where assuming attraction can take a little turn.
Yeah I'm not really bothered, that's why I decided to risk direct rather than just blend in with all the other guys who hit on her during the night. I guess she is working and has a major bitch shield up. I was more interested in the psychology behind it, usually girls are caught off guard and go a bit shy about it, and I can have some fun from there, but in this instance she got defensive and pissy. Also my mistake to try and rectify that at the time.Its great to assume women are into you, but you also have to be self aware enough to know when to take a step forward and/or a step backward. Its quote possible that she may have been starring at you, but from the moment you approached, and in the manner you approached it clearly appears that it didn't have the impact you intended for it have. Women are creatures of the moment, they can like you today and then be completely turned off by something you say or a frame/manner in which you project yourself 30 seconds later. I'd definitely pull back and just let her be for now. There are probably plenty of other chicks in that local setting for you to talk to. Will be interesting to see the next time I go in there, she won't be able to look anywhere in my direction without it seeming she's staring even if she doesn't want to haha |
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| Author: | n2thevoid [ Fri Jul 10, 2015 5:34 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Pick up hired gun |
It's one thing to be direct, I think your approach was an over compensation, however, and she intuited/sensed it. Instead strike up a conversation, you don't need to go with the "I know you want me" talk. If the vibes there it's there. It's one thing to ramp-up the tension, but another to completely blow yourself out by over-doing it (a case of too much too soon - assuming she WAS generally attracted to you). This approach would likely work well if you're gay and approaching another dude in a gay bar, or the girl is a complete slut in which case it'd hardly matter how you approach if she's already attracted to you. Also, how did you "grab" her? If you're doing it from behind where you're out of her line-of-sight that is a big no no. Next time less is more. The fact you approached is great, but being direct doesnt always entail putting a girl on the stop like that - basically going from 0-100mph. Instead a "Hey I'm Dorian, I'd noticed you earlier and thought I'd say "hi". You are? (outstretched arm)" kind of deal. |
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