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Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next time
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Author:  KamiSamir [ Sun May 24, 2015 5:09 pm ]
Post subject:  Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next time
Hi guys,

So basically I was interessed in this HB9 that has 20 or 30 guys interested and texting her. She is kinda out of range for me and she friendzoned me some months ago (at that time she started describing her dream guy that would be the opposite of me, saying in a nice way that I was a really good friend and no chance of being more than that..and other things just to make it clear before I tried anything..)

I got away a little bit and stop seeing her for a while and then tried again my luck and went out to a date (dinner) with her. I thought that it would be a date but after 10 minutes I realised that this was not a "date" for her, it was just her having a nice conversation with a friend. I then started feeling a little bit frustrated and things didn't go out as planned. Game over, we are just friends.

Now my question: Since she is my "friend" now, and she has 2 or 3 dates per week with guys trying their luck and paying her things, should I ask her in a nice way, what she thinks I did wrong in our date and pointing out my mistakes, so I can improve my game in the future with other girls, or would that be creepy and stupid?
Author:  Noone [ Sun May 24, 2015 5:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Women don't know what they want.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Sun May 24, 2015 5:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
I wouldn't - but if you don't give a shit about your "friendship" with her and she won't be useful in getting you dates/laid with her friends - you don't have a whole lot to lose by asking.

Here's the thing: your learning opportunities for next time are limited here.

It's entirely possible and also probable (given her interest from so many other guys) she simply wasn't attracted to you in the first place... And there's not much you can do about that. Beyond that, the next girl won't have the same hang ups and won't be attracted to exactly the same stuff as this girl.
Author:  n2thevoid [ Sun May 24, 2015 5:46 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
What works for one girl may have the opposite effect on the other. Maybe you said something in a cute way that reminded her of an ex she has fond memories for, maybe you walk a certain way that reminded her of her uncle the child molester. Point is there's no sense in getting all wound up about it. It may have been absolutely nothing you'd did, and if you ask she may not really know (maybe more of a vibe thing) and give you a misleading answer if put on the spot.

We aren't intended to be a match for everyone around us, if that were the case it'd be easy to get into a relationship with the next thing that comes along. Just accept that for whatever reason it didn't work and game other girls. She may prove useful as a friend in getting to 'get' women better, but beyond that just accept what is and game other girls.
Author:  JackZero [ Sun May 24, 2015 6:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Most women won't tell you what you did wrong at the risk of hurting your feelings and/or keeping themselves from looking bad. You can ask, but more than likely you won't get an honest answer.
Author:  Eddie Fews [ Sun May 24, 2015 7:33 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
If you wanted to learn how to catch a deer would you ask the deer or the deer hunter?

She has no idea what you did wrong more than likely, she is just going by what she feels. All of her answers will likely be a failed attempt to express a multitude of emotions. She friend zoned you because you made her "Feel" friend when you interacted with her.

And friend is an over statement. The truth is, you made her feel that you were too far beneath her. And a woman is only going to feel attraction for a man who subconsciously believes he's better than her. Word that how you want, but as a man you must be able to or at least believe you're capable of elevating her. The same way a King can marry a woman of any quality and turn her into a queen. You walk like this king, talk like this king, and when you look her in the eyes she knows that she'll becomes a queen in your presence.

In modern term.. The girl just has to think you're the shit man. And the only way for that to happen is for you to first think you're the shit. You'll project that, she'll pick up on it, and reflect that right back to you.
Author:  Pikeman85 [ Mon May 25, 2015 4:47 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
You are assuming women know what they want, and furthermore, that they care to give good faith advice. The idea of her rejecting you and then you getting a better woman is disgusting to a woman.

The only thing that actually matters for a woman is, "did he make it happen".

If you did, well, you clearly deserved it.

If you didn't, well, you clearly deserved it.

They just simply don't care - why would they? At best they'll give you good girl game advice (basically, be pleasant, quiet and demure), or nice platitudes they've heard ("be nice and do things for her and show her you really care! Girls love that!"). All advice they give is garbage. You'd almost be better served by doing exactly the opposite.
Author:  groovy_boy [ Mon May 25, 2015 5:27 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Quote:
If you wanted to learn how to catch a deer would you ask the deer or the deer hunter?

She has no idea what you did wrong more than likely, she is just going by what she feels. All of her answers will likely be a failed attempt to express a multitude of emotions. She friend zoned you because you made her "Feel" friend when you interacted with her.

And friend is an over statement. The truth is, you made her feel that you were too far beneath her. And a woman is only going to feel attraction for a man who subconsciously believes he's better than her. Word that how you want, but as a man you must be able to or at least believe you're capable of elevating her. The same way a King can marry a woman of any quality and turn her into a queen. You walk like this king, talk like this king, and when you look her in the eyes she knows that she'll becomes a queen in your presence.

In modern term.. The girl just has to think you're the shit man. And the only way for that to happen is for you to first think you're the shit. You'll project that, she'll pick up on it, and reflect that right back to you.
All of the above. Eddie Fews knows his shit.

Remember this phrase: Attraction isn't a choice. Think of you being the girl and the guy asks you what you did wrong? You might not have done anything wrong, she was just not attracted to you nor is she able to logically make a list on the spot to say why she didn't feel attracted to you. If she is hot and cool to be around and you can genuinely be able to be friends with then you can learn a lot from interacting with a beautiful woman, maybe build a circle of female friends, increase your social value, be more comfortable around hot women.

This is much better than pulling away and isolating her and NOT interacting with any beautiful woman in your life. It sounds like you are a clever and logical guy and aim to improve that is why you want the feedback. But not from her. Think about someone you consider an alpha male. The Rock, Vin Diesel. Would they be asking her this question. It brings to my mind, if you watched the Fast and Furious 7, at the last scene Michelle Rodriguez asked Vin diesel why he didn't tell her about being married before when she could not remember. His reply was "Cause you can't force someone to love you"
Author:  R.C [ Mon May 25, 2015 7:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Don't ask her. She won't give you anything of value and if she does, you already know it.
Author:  CharlesFinley [ Mon May 25, 2015 12:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Quote:
Think about someone you consider an alpha male. The Rock, Vin Diesel. Would they be asking her this question. It brings to my mind, if you watched the Fast and Furious 7, at the last scene Michelle Rodriguez asked Vin diesel why he didn't tell her about being married before when she could not remember. His reply was "Cause you can't force someone to love you"
You know this is a movie, right? With scripted lines and isn't even close to real life?
Author:  groovy_boy [ Mon May 25, 2015 1:21 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Quote:
You know this is a movie, right? With scripted lines and isn't even close to real life?
Irrespective if it was in a movie or not, for you I guess ignore all the rest above and keep the last sentence. You can't force someone to love you or feel attraction towards you.
Author:  Versalis [ Sat May 30, 2015 2:00 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Quote:
She has no idea what you did wrong more than likely, she is just going by what she feels. All of her answers will likely be a failed attempt to express a multitude of emotions. She friend zoned you because you made her "Feel" friend when you interacted with her.
Image
Author:  thequietlife [ Mon Jun 01, 2015 11:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Eddie and jack have summed it up, in my personal experience and opinion,asking a girl where you went wrong is just a big NO NO.

1. You will never in the majority of cases get an honest or accurate reason as to where you went wrong.

2. Regardless of whether you see this girl or associate with this girl, it just not a good vibe to have, it sounds weak.
Author:  Darwanedr [ Thu Jun 04, 2015 5:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Best thing to do is go get another girl that is gorgeous or a friend and then introduce the gorgeous girl to the girl that you want she will then get jealous and this will make the girl that you want like you more and want you


Good Luck :mrgreen:
Author:  Darwanedr [ Thu Jun 04, 2015 5:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Friendzone: Asking her what I did wrong to improve next
Quote:
Hi guys,

So basically I was interessed in this HB9 that has 20 or 30 guys interested and texting her. She is kinda out of range for me and she friendzoned me some months ago (at that time she started describing her dream guy that would be the opposite of me, saying in a nice way that I was a really good friend and no chance of being more than that..and other things just to make it clear before I tried anything..)

I got away a little bit and stop seeing her for a while and then tried again my luck and went out to a date (dinner) with her. I thought that it would be a date but after 10 minutes I realised that this was not a "date" for her, it was just her having a nice conversation with a friend. I then started feeling a little bit frustrated and things didn't go out as planned. Game over, we are just friends.

Now my question: Since she is my "friend" now, and she has 2 or 3 dates per week with guys trying their luck and paying her things, should I ask her in a nice way, what she thinks I did wrong in our date and pointing out my mistakes, so I can improve my game in the future with other girls, or would that be creepy and stupid?

Best thing to do is go get another girl that is gorgeous or a friend and then introduce the gorgeous girl to the girl that you want she will then get jealous and this will make the girl that you want like you more and want you


Good Luck :mrgreen:
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