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| I just don't know what to say https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=190098 |
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| Author: | HectorH [ Mon May 04, 2015 7:43 pm ] |
| Post subject: | I just don't know what to say |
Guys I am not afraid to approach a girl and even talk to a girl.. I just don't know what to say to a girl the problem is I'm a really good listener, but a really bad communicator and I usually end up giving a girl a interview.. What are some tips on just having a fun conversation.. and how to avoid me just asking a girl questions ? |
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| Author: | CharlesFinley [ Mon May 04, 2015 8:22 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Active listening. Get involved in what she's saying... if she's passionate about something and you are as well, that's a connection - plus you can speak intelligently about it. Or just people watch... The point is to participate and share the conversation. |
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| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Mon May 04, 2015 9:52 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
How many approaches would you say you have? |
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| Author: | Capaverde [ Mon May 04, 2015 9:58 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: Guys I am not afraid to approach a girl and even talk to a girl.. I just don't know what to say to a girl the problem is I'm a really good listener, but a really bad communicator and I usually end up giving a girl a interview.. What are some tips on just having a fun conversation.. and how to avoid me just asking a girl questions ?
Don't say unnecessary things, no need to interview her. As a rule, only ask her things if you really want to know those things, not just for the sake of asking, or you won't know how to follow through. It's not really a game where you need to keep the conversation going and going or you'll lose, if there's a direction she can give her part on keeping it going too.
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| Author: | HectorH [ Tue May 05, 2015 3:48 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: How many approaches would you say you have?
0 most girls approach me.. last week at this party a girl walks right up to and ask my name i told her and ask hers and she told me hers and then there was an awkward pause and I just walked away...
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| Author: | R.C [ Tue May 05, 2015 6:21 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
That's because you're too busy cowering inside of your own head. You're honestly telling me there's nothing you want to say to a hottie approaching you at a party? Ask for a drink and then say "sorry I though you were the waitress". Tell her she has man hands. Say that she's almost as cute as you are. Christ tell her you haven't had sex in 4 years. Anything is better than just walking away. |
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| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Tue May 05, 2015 10:02 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: Quote: How many approaches would you say you have?
0 most girls approach me.. last week at this party a girl walks right up to and ask my name i told her and ask hers and she told me hers and then there was an awkward pause and I just walked away...many women have YOU approached? Thats the question |
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| Author: | Mr. Assertive [ Tue May 05, 2015 2:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
approach and then try to transition into a normal conversation. Why did you stop her? Why are you there? Be honest. In the beginning just tease her and try to get her to laugh. This always warms things up...after that, it should be easier to go into normal conversation. Don't forget to screen/qualify her 
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| Author: | HectorH [ Tue May 05, 2015 8:36 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: approach and then try to transition into a normal conversation. Why did you stop her? Why are you there? Be honest. In the beginning just tease her and try to get her to laugh. This always warms things up...after that, it should be easier to go into normal conversation. Don't forget to screen/qualify her
what do you mean by screen and qualify her ? and how
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| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Tue May 05, 2015 8:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: Quote: approach and then try to transition into a normal conversation. Why did you stop her? Why are you there? Be honest. In the beginning just tease her and try to get her to laugh. This always warms things up...after that, it should be easier to go into normal conversation. Don't forget to screen/qualify her
what do you mean by screen and qualify her ? and howHow many women would you say you have approached hector? It sounds like you haven't approached too many and the problems you stated easily correct themselves when you begin doing that which you said you do not fear. |
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| Author: | HectorH [ Tue May 05, 2015 9:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: Quote: Quote: approach and then try to transition into a normal conversation. Why did you stop her? Why are you there? Be honest. In the beginning just tease her and try to get her to laugh. This always warms things up...after that, it should be easier to go into normal conversation. Don't forget to screen/qualify her
what do you mean by screen and qualify her ? and howHow many women would you say you have approached hector? It sounds like you haven't approached too many and the problems you stated easily correct themselves when you begin doing that which you said you do not fear. |
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| Author: | bartm [ Wed May 06, 2015 12:51 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote:
I don't approach because I don't know what to say.. I usually just say hey or how are you and move on because I don't know what to say next..
sorry but I just dont buy that you are not nervous when you approach. you are nervous and that's why you feel like you have nothing to talk about. Also, dont try to fake interest. if you have nothing in common with the person, of course you will have nothing to talk about. approach people that are similar to you. for example an engineer should never approach a bartender because the engineer is boring, the bartender is a people person. of course they will have nothing to talk about. |
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| Author: | Versalis [ Wed May 06, 2015 2:28 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
You feel like there is a right thing to say. That when she gives her name, you need to transition into->awesome????. But that's not really it. In communication in general(though especially the first few minutes), the particular words barely matter. It's all about how you're feeling and how you're making her feel. It's not what you say, it's how you say it Ask her how her night is going, say that you love/hate the song that's playing, etc, etc. Yes, bland stuff is mostly fine. If you stay completely trapped in bland stuff for extended periods, then we have more an unusual sticking point. But right now, it just seems like you aren't even trying to ramble about whatever. You're taking a "Go big or go home" attitude, so you're just going home.
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| Author: | Capaverde [ Wed May 06, 2015 4:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
Quote: Quote: How many women would you say you have approached hector? It sounds like you haven't approached too many and the problems you stated easily correct themselves when you begin doing that which you said you do not fear. |
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| Author: | Gallahad [ Wed May 06, 2015 11:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: I just don't know what to say |
HectorH, Being straight with you, and don't take this the wrong way but It seems like you have a lack of general PUA concepts and strategies in general. I suggest you read Neil Straus's "The Game" and "The Rules of the Game." The game will introduce you to PUA concepts and The Rules of the Game will answer almost all of your questions. READ BOTH! |
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