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| Apparently I'm BF material and not lay material....(Tokyo) https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=187793 |
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| Author: | LostInTokyo [ Mon Feb 09, 2015 1:37 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Apparently I'm BF material and not lay material....(Tokyo) |
So, yeah, I'm new. Living in Tokyo. Well, barely. On the outer fringes. Anyway, my game is great for getting digits and dates, but apparently I am boyfriend material and not lay material. The dates are usually successful (in the sense that I go out with the girl more than once) and occasionally I will get laid in the process, but there are many days I just want to go out for the night, get laid, and say "see ya" the next morning without having to spend weeks working on a girl. Some consistency would be nice, at least. I've been analyzing what I've been doing wrong, and I have come to three areas: 1. The Venue I have met girls online, at bars, or at singles parties. Of those I would think bars would be the best place to find DTF girls but apparently not. Maybe I'm just going to the wrong bars. I'm not that much of a drinker so I don't go often. I would like to try the club scene since that seems to be the easiest place to find DTF girls, but it's hard finding a place that isn't a sausage fest. Plus I can't really dance, cover fees and drinks are expensive, and my last train home stops running at 11:30. If I don't pick up a girl within 1-2 hours I'm going to get bored of the place, or if I flub things with a girl I'm stuck out in the cold until the 5am trains. Waste of money and time. I haven't tried day game because Japanese are really weird about being approached when alcohol isn't involved or the venue isn't specifically set up for social purposes. 2. Escalation I am slow to escalate. A lot of it is just getting over fear of rejection, and that's a bit amplified with the lack of privacy here. Not to mention something as simple as a peck on the cheek in public is "embarrassing" to a lot of girls. One girl I'm playing the long game with loves sex but hates sex talk/innuendo and gets embarrassed with any PDA beyond holding hands. Yeah, I don't get it either. I have seen a lot of conflicting info about kino so I won't talk about that unless someone wants me to. 3. Personality/Conversation I blame my Southern upbringing. I'm always "Ladies first," which is great in the bedroom and serious relationships but terrible for getting in a girl's pants. If I be myself, I can approach with confidence, strike up a conversation, keep her entertained (mostly). But I can't verbally escalate things. I have no wit with innuendo (my humor is situational) and I don't know where the line between fun sex talk and offensive sex talk is. And by that I mean that I assume women will find any and all sex talk/innuendo offensive. Which, judging by the girls' reactions when I see Japanese dudes crack innuendo, is true here. If I be myself I'm boyfriend material, but if I'm an ass I won't get anything. This is why I'm thinking about the club scene since conversation isn't really stressed there, but see #1. I'm also approaching in straight Japanese, which may be hurting me. On the one hand, it gives me a huge advantage since it opens up the field for really attractive girls who can't speak English and the fact that a white guy can speak well enough to converse with them blows their minds. On the negative side, it means I'm not interacting with the girls looking for a short-term foreigner fling since Japanese ability generally means you're not just a visitor. I'm hesitant to try English because so far I haven't met many girls who can even speak basic English. Even in Tokyo. Has anyone had experience with the Tokyo scene? I could use some pointers. |
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