I think the best thing is to just cut off contact for a few days and give her the cold shoulder, while i cool down a bit. Let me know what you guys think, i need to regain respect in this relationship fast!

I love the way you answered your own question lol.. Thats exactly what you need to do. A girl can't just fuck up and then walk back into your life like nothing happened just moments later. Because if so; whats stopping her from repeating the same behavior? Why wouldn't she do it again, when she could call you a day later and everything could just be fine.

Now this is something I've understood with the cold shoulder that you have to be prepared for. And trust me here please. You're going to have to wait one day longer than you want to. Its the only way she's going to respect you. Lets say you cool off in 2 days and feel like " I can talk to her now, i'm not even mad anymore".. Wait a 3rd day. That initial rush of " I'm not mad anymore" is weakness. It'll turn her off. Use your strength and hold on for one day longer than you want to.

Trust me on that. Everything else you're fine. But please follow the rule I laid out above. It never fails.

So in other words, rub her nose in it...

This isn't dog training (although I know a lot of you guys have been convinced it is). Punishment is a manipulative tactic one uses on a child to get what they want, if you want to build a relationship on someone with this in mind, then by all means operate out of this frame.

All this tactic will do is stoke negative sentiment, and fear which is exploiting one's insecurities. This is why guys who rely on PUA tactics end up losing the girl in the end. Not trying to sound like a cocky bastard but in all probability I've had more LTRs than most guys on this site, and when i was younger and less experienced I believed such exploitative tactics worked; in short, they don't and only foster adversarial relationships. You can't force somebody, or goad somebody into respecting you, that's not respect, it's simply hitting on their fear buttons and isn't conducive to anything healthy.

I always try to come out of a place of authenticity, if to you that's weak, then that's the lie society told you. Authenticity means declaring one's intentions to one's self and to the world around you. So somebody did something that was disrespectful towards me (MY interpretation, after all disrespect isn't something somebody else does). I tell them how their behavior has influenced me, and offer them to give ME the 'gift' of helping meet that need which wasn't met.

I would definitely argue that you've been in more long term relationships than I have. But I'm not sure quantity is a issue as much as quality is.

Not to mention; you've just admittedly gotten out of a socially, mentally and emotionally destructive relationship; so I'm not sure what makes you think you even qualify to have an opinion on this matter. How did the advice above help you in your last relationship?

It isn't dog training; its simply that consequences follow disrespectful actions. You're late to work, you no show no call at work.. what happens? You get fired. Name one aspect of life other than this hollywood romantic idea of what "love" is that consequences don't follow wrong actions? Cut it out noid. We usually agree. And when we reference your most recent experience in a relationship; I would think that this is one matter that you would want to push what you think you know back into your subconscious and listen to someone who's been there, done it and is still doing it in his current relationship.

I'm speaking from a position of someone who understands emotions. A person who undersands that the initial " i'll talk to her now" feeling is just an emotional backlash that has resulted from the anger he had previously. Thats not his AUTHENTIC self speaking. Its more emotion; just as the ANGER that made him want to break up with her was an emotion. We need both of those emotions to subside before he can make a decision. We don't make a choice at the first sign that anger has dissipated. Because there is still an emotion lingering that remains. Thats an emotional whiplash that is often swept under the rug. An emotion that will cause a further loss of respect if its immediately acted on. And thats where many of the "pua" and other forum members get it wrong.

But this is a forum, so if you must.. Feel free to carry on.

I think the best thing is to just cut off contact for a few days and give her the cold shoulder, while i cool down a bit. Let me know what you guys think, i need to regain respect in this relationship fast!