| PUA Forum https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/ |
|
| Dating a girl who cancels occasionally https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=182433 |
Page 1 of 1 |
| Author: | afcforthewin [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 8:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
How do you guys deal with dating a girl who will occasionally cancel on dates? My go to move for first date flakes is to act like it's no big deal and then using a freeze out, which usually turns into my forgetting about the girl and moving on. But to be honest I don't have a lot of experience actually dating flaky girls. The girl I've been dating cancels about 20-30% of the time. She always tries to reschedule, and I don't get the feeling she's flaking to avoid seeing me (which I think is the issue with many first date flakes who develop second thoughts). Putting aside the fact that this is probably due to a deeper issue in the relationship, how would you address this issue? |
|
| Author: | n2thevoid [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 8:39 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
She's not quite invested, likely has attention from other guys and is therefore just going with whatever feels right to her in the moment. Young girls coming into their sexuality, often times everywhere and nowhere at the same time. Freeze out won't do a thing but make her forget you. |
|
| Author: | BITmixit [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 10:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
She's notifying you and rearranging. Which are both good things. It's not always other guys but assume it is and condition yourself to not care. Freezing out is a solution that really only works if she's in your bed and is showing LMR. Just literally respond like it's not big deal and be "vague" about the reschedule. Usually goes like this for me. Her: "Hey, I'm really sorry but I can't make tonight. Could we rearrange to Monday maybe?" Me: "No worries, Got some other stuff to do, probably go do some salsa dancing or something. I'll let you know about Monday when I know" Dating is a casual thing and should remain so. Showing anything but casualness/not caring will weird her out a bit. Girls want to be a big deal to you but they *want* to make themselves a big deal to you. Making a big deal out of her not meeting up with by either flaking or whatever will bore her. After 3 flakes just keep the number in your phone for the future but definitely move on to another girl. Keep the number for a "lucky" fuck or something. |
|
| Author: | TheFury [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 6:17 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
Quote: How do you guys deal with dating a girl who will occasionally cancel on dates? My go to move for first date flakes is to act like it's no big deal and then using a freeze out, which usually turns into my forgetting about the girl and moving on. But to be honest I don't have a lot of experience actually dating flaky girls.
You have sex with her yet?
The girl I've been dating cancels about 20-30% of the time. She always tries to reschedule, and I don't get the feeling she's flaking to avoid seeing me (which I think is the issue with many first date flakes who develop second thoughts). Putting aside the fact that this is probably due to a deeper issue in the relationship, how would you address this issue? |
|
| Author: | Eddie Fews [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 9:33 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
From my experience; women only do the things they feel like they can get away with doing. Meaning.. if she feels like she can flake on you and you'll still stick around/give her your attention. Why wouldn't she flake when not feeling up to it? What would be the consequence of flaking? Nothing? She could just see you another day? Why not flake? If you went into your local market, rounded up a bunch of groceries, walked out of the store with them without paying, and no one said a thing. Hell the cops were even there and they didn't say anything. What are you going to do? Keep repeating the action because there was no consequence for the action. You have to develop some form of consequence. Women are always testing us to see what they can get away with. Once I began nexting girls after one flake and never talking to them again even if they texted me asking me to come over their house. Women stopped flaking on me. Because they were able to feel from my vibe that they would never see me again if they did. |
|
| Author: | LoboD [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 11:04 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
I'm starting to understand the whole flaking thing as well. At first I wondered what was up. I was new to the flaking then I understood a lot more about it after the first time it happened. Basically they do want to know how much they can get away with. They also want to figure out if they have that power over you. Don't let it happen like that. I agree with being vague and saying that your busy as well. Or that something came up, but not saying what. |
|
| Author: | Hint [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 11:27 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
call them out. your investing your time to talk with them, and your investing potential time to try and go out with them. if they flake and act like nothing happened i would call them out and make them aware that they are not the only thing i can be investing my time on. usually they don't accept what I'm saying and i never see or talk with them again. better that way because why waste your time with someone who is clearly playing games. |
|
| Author: | WillEdward [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 11:39 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
It's difficult to see why she is flaking on you without some details on the interaction. How many times have you been on dates with her and how far have you escalated with her? |
|
| Author: | Hint [ Wed Aug 06, 2014 11:45 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
Quote: It's difficult to see why she is flaking on you without some details on the interaction. How many times have you been on dates with her and how far have you escalated with her?
in other words how well do you know this person. personally speaking if she is trying to reschedule with you then her flaking isn't probably done on purpose. how many rescheduled dates have you gone on? if zero then she's prob playing games. |
|
| Author: | afcforthewin [ Thu Aug 07, 2014 5:40 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
Quote: You have sex with her yet? We've been dating about 2 months we see each other about once a week. We've always gone on dates after she rescheduled. I don't think she's consciously trying to play games, it's more likely an interest level issue. Bottom line I'm just trying to figure out how to balance acting like I don't care (which is how I've been dealing with it) with calling her out. |
|
| Author: | Ardour [ Thu Aug 07, 2014 6:44 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
Never call them out on it. Unless done as a joke. The moment it stops being fun, it's over. IMO this isn't a problem of low interest, shes consciously rescheduling and keeping to this new arrangement. You're obviously fairly high, just maybe not top. It all depends on why she reschedules. Is she legit busy or going out with her mates instead or not telling you anything? |
|
| Author: | oceanx [ Fri Aug 08, 2014 3:02 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
When she texts, don't reply at all from time to time. Get her mind thinking about you and what you're up to. TELL her the fun shit you've got going on. No biggie if she can't make it, something else came up for you. If she keeps flaking, there is a simple solution - next! |
|
| Author: | n2thevoid [ Fri Aug 08, 2014 7:33 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
When she asks what you did last night tell her you went for a ride in your new rocket car your friend helped build with you in your basement. And that you drove to the moon and didn't realize how big the craters were till you got there. Tell her like with the utmost certainty that way she can't doubt you. She'll see how exciting you are and when she asks to ride in said vehicle (it doesnt exist obviously), just tell her you gave it to your friend. if she asks to meet this friend just say he moved to Nebraska. Edit: Oh hey I almost forgot, if you live in Nebraska just make up some other far away state. God speed! |
|
| Author: | falboe [ Fri Aug 08, 2014 11:58 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Dating a girl who cancels occasionally |
You have to develop some form of consequence. Women are always testing us to see what they can get away with. |
|
| Page 1 of 1 | All times are UTC |
| Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group http://www.phpbb.com/ |
|