Hey man,

If you've never played basketball before, and then one take I toss you a ball and say " Here go out and play"; it would take some time for you to actually adjust. Eventually you would be able to pick things up.


The fact that you're out there signifies that you're doing outstanding.. The majority of this forum are still asking questions about some girl they liked in high school. Keep studying some of your favorite material and keep practicing. You're already ahead of the game.

I got destroyed and played by a crazy girl in 2011

I can relate, Pikeman85. I once befriended this gal in an online MMO, but was completely subjugated by her as she becomes dangerously passive-aggresive. Always wanting to get in control. An introvert like myself didn't know how to deal with her escalating cyber-bullying back then.

It was only not too long ago that I finally snapped and completely blocked all contacts with her. Life's been better ever since. I don't need the panic attacks when I play my game everytime I log in.

Anyway, putting that aside. I'm willing to admit that for almost five years I've been getting my 'fix' online (Hey, a guy has his needs. D:<) and when transitioning online to RL, the first steps can be extremely overwhelming as well. I've gain plenty of success online, but hey...compared to what plenty of folks might've done around the world? I feel like nothing.

So yes, time to step up the game. (This is also keeping in mind that I'm aware online and offline interactions are TWO completely different things. So everything is a new learning process for me).

P.S. Recently, I number-closed a new girl. She lives nearby my place, and I've been wanting to ask her out. Haven't tried anything because I wasn't sure where to begin.

Advice?

You: Excuse me, do you know where X shop is ?
Her: Yeah you take a right here and -
You (interrupt her): Ok ok, stop. I lied. I don't need directions, I just thought you were cute and needed some lame pretext. Hi, I'm <name>.

State your intention. She knows it anyway, you know it and half the people waling on the street know it. Trying to sleaze your way into a phone number by talking about pants for 1 min and then out of the blue asking for digits (and getting rejected, for good reason) is a major turn off for any girl, because you're basically saying: "I already think I'm out of your league. Number plssexplsplx."

Point is, be chill, friendly (by friendly I mean non-threatening) and smile. Most importantly, have fun. Enjoy these interactions. If you do, so will she.

In one day you accomplished more than most guys on this board achieve in a year.

You're aware of your limiting beliefs, they are YOUR beliefs and are TRUE only if you subscribe to them. You're learning how pointless it is to hold onto them by direct experience. Good on you.

Keep doing what you're doing, you'll fine tune the whole process. Realizing rejection aint no thing will probably be the most dramatic change in creating a frame of abundance.

Hi there.

I've registered about two years ago and have made barely any progress due to wanting to focus on life and stuff. After all that, I've graduated last December and finally want to try to step up my game.

First off, I'm based in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. Needless to say, the pool of people from around the world here is overwhelming at best. Making myself more beyond anxious.

I've always been a strong believer that Asian men, especially of the oriental gene are far less attractive compared to other races but after plenty of encounters. I finally break the ice:

"It really doesn't matter what race I am."

Because apparently when you're a funny guy, you're a funny guy. That's it. People'll love you for who you are, and those who don't. I don't pay heed to them.

I've only recently told myself that I've got nothing to lose and went on for direct approaches right away. However, the thought of asking a random lady's phone number can be extremely overwhelming. I don't fear rejection, I just fear of being labelled a creep.

By the end of the day, I discovered that we'll only be labelled creeps if we ACTUALLY BEHAVE LIKE ONE. I dismissed that fact, I don't stutter, and I told myself I got nothing to lose.

Maybe I went overboard a bit and maybe I think too much. When I walk up to this cute girl I saw, I said 'Excuse me' and asked about the location of a boutique based on the shopping bag she's carrying. The problem I found? I dragged the conversation perhaps too long. I used up about 30 seconds talking about myself wanting to buy a pair of pants.

Then I asked her number, in which she said no. I smiled, said my thanks and left. Rejection doesn't feel bad after all, but this is only my third try after wandering around for almost 5 hours 'on the prowl'.

So....the question is, am I doing anything wrong? Or am I just not lucky yet?