PUA Forum
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=164266		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  mcooper112 [ Mon Jun 17, 2013 5:11 pm ]
Post subject:  Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Hello fellow PUAs,

This is an incredible forum and the support you guys offer is amazing! :D

So I'm feeling pretty down and I need advice.

I met this HB8 on an online dating site. We had a bit of banter and finally arrange a first date. Before the first for about a week there is a bit of a build-up to it. We texted back and forth and flirted a lot. We even spoke on the phone the day before the date. We are both keen and excited!

The day of the date finally comes. We meet up on a Friday night at a lounge. We spend about 4 hours together and it is going great. Lots of eye contact and kino escalation (holding hands, touching legs, etc). We end up making out for like two hours. She says she digs me a lot and that she finds me attractive. She did say that she dates a lot (she seemed like a serial dater). Anyway, I really felt we clicked both physically and mentally. Let us say I had a great time and was really hoping to see her again. She even told me she would like to see me again.

Now she told me that night that she been sleeping only a few hours during the week and was exhausted. And she desperately needed to catch up on her sleep. She also said she wasn't free that weekend to hang out

I put her in a cab at the end of the night and we kiss some more. She says she will text me when she gets home.

She does text me when she gets home and says she had a great night and sweet dreams. I text her back saying the same.

So far so good.....

The next day (Saturday) in the late after noon I send her a simple text saying "Hey- did you manage to catch up on your sleep?" and got no response. I got no response on Saturday, no response on Sunday and now it is Monday after noon and still no response. I have to say I'm pretty upset and disappointed.

I don't get how a first date can go very well and then NOTHING!!!!!

What should I do next?

Should I try texting again? Should I try calling?

I haven't tried anything since that text as I didn't want to appear keen. I thought I sent a very simple text checking up on her. Really surprised by the lack of a response, especially that for the whole week before the date we were texting all the time and even spoke on the phone. Also the date itself went very well (at least according to me and with all that making out) . And she text me when she got home but since then RADIO SILENCE....in fact ignoring.

It is a real bummer!

I appreciate your guys feedback and help!

Thanks.
Mark
Author:  Mr. Marville [ Mon Jun 17, 2013 6:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Hello Mark,

There's no real reply to this other than pointing out how women are spoiled by the dating culture and seem to Always have an abudance of men to choose from, whereas the reverse is not true. By the looks of things she baited you perfectly, but then who knows she might be seeing multiple men at the same time.

Also, indeed there are serial-daters, meaning women who are addicted to that initial surge of tension and romance; you find them on date sites, texting sites, etc.

For more information, see these threads:

power-of-entitlement-why-naturals-settl ... emasculate

post780437.html?hilit=society based upon woman needs#p780437
Author:  wingintyme [ Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
One thing you will learn in time is that to you, a date or interaction may be going great. To them you may be average and replaceable but they are letting you believe it's going great for them too.

You might try ignoring her for a week then calling. I read some of the first response which said they have an abundance of choices but men do not. I can understand what he's trying to say but you have to create more choices for yourself like they have.
Author:  mcooper112 [ Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Thanks guys.

So what's my best bet?

Waiting a week to call her? And if she doesn't pick up should I leave a voicemail?

Do you guys think this is over or there is a chance to get her back in the picture?

It seems that us men have to always play the numbers while women have choices. We have to keep on dating, keep on sarging, keep sending out e-mails. While they get to decide. If they liked us they get us. Not other way around.

The point I am getting is seems we should always be meeting new ladies. But what if it is exhausting to always be meeting new ladies? And what if you really liked the last girl you met like I did?
Author:  wingintyme [ Mon Jun 17, 2013 10:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
Thanks guys.

So what's my best bet?

Waiting a week to call her? And if she doesn't pick up should I leave a voicemail?

Do you guys think this is over or there is a chance to get her back in the picture?

It seems that us men have to always play the numbers while women have choices. We have to keep on dating, keep on sarging, keep sending out e-mails. While they get to decide. If they liked us they get us. Not other way around.

The point I am getting is seems we should always be meeting new ladies. But what if it is exhausting to always be meeting new ladies? And what if you really liked the last girl you met like I did?
I think you are going wrong in 2 aspects; 1.) you are relying too much on the internet. The more attractive women they are, the more internet options they have even if that's the only type of dating they do. I did an experiment once posting a fake female ad on craigslist personals and within 2 days had over 200 different guys responding. Craigslist isn't even known for personals ads. I never even used a pic just implied I might be hot. Out of the 200+ guys, I could see that approximately 10% would have been viable candidates to date her. So, there's 20 guys a girl can play with on her phone in 2 days time, and we aren't even talking about all the other dating sites. That number can easily be 100+ viable online options within a few miles of her within a few days, while you are getting one viable response every 30 days. If all you can do is internet game you better be patient and probably have pretty low standards.



2.)You are over thinking one girl. You will not get the "one"girl you want with the small amount of experience you have unless you are about an 8 yourself trying to pursue a fat 4. You may need to just get out and make more friends, guys or girls. If you don't know many people and feel like you don't have a lot of options you have to be talking to almost anything you think attracts you that you see. Grocery store, gas pump, gym, library, I don't give a shit
Author:  DeepBluesy [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 12:56 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Buyer's Remorse.
Author:  mcooper112 [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 1:36 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
Quote:
Thanks guys.

So what's my best bet?

Waiting a week to call her? And if she doesn't pick up should I leave a voicemail?

Do you guys think this is over or there is a chance to get her back in the picture?

It seems that us men have to always play the numbers while women have choices. We have to keep on dating, keep on sarging, keep sending out e-mails. While they get to decide. If they liked us they get us. Not other way around.

The point I am getting is seems we should always be meeting new ladies. But what if it is exhausting to always be meeting new ladies? And what if you really liked the last girl you met like I did?
I think you are going wrong in 2 aspects; 1.) you are relying too much on the internet. The more attractive women they are, the more internet options they have even if that's the only type of dating they do. I did an experiment once posting a fake female ad on craigslist personals and within 2 days had over 200 different guys responding. Craigslist isn't even known for personals ads. I never even used a pic just implied I might be hot. Out of the 200+ guys, I could see that approximately 10% would have been viable candidates to date her. So, there's 20 guys a girl can play with on her phone in 2 days time, and we aren't even talking about all the other dating sites. That number can easily be 100+ viable online options within a few miles of her within a few days, while you are getting one viable response every 30 days. If all you can do is internet game you better be patient and probably have pretty low standards.



2.)You are over thinking one girl. You will not get the "one"girl you want with the small amount of experience you have unless you are about an 8 yourself trying to pursue a fat 4. You may need to just get out and make more friends, guys or girls. If you don't know many people and feel like you don't have a lot of options you have to be talking to almost anything you think attracts you that you see. Grocery store, gas pump, gym, library, I don't give a shit
I got that and i appreciate what you are saying. And I know i need to be out on the field more and I'm working on it. But am just wondering is there anything I can do now to revive this? What can I do to get her back in the picture?
Author:  wingintyme [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 1:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
go get 3 other phone numbers first of girls who look better.

after you have 3 other numbers call her and say something out of the ordinary that has nothing to do with your date or her ignoring you.

personally I think it sounds like you are a little bit of a loser coming here asking how to revive this one situation and that's probably why she's not talking to you
Author:  mcooper112 [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 1:25 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
go get 3 other phone numbers first of girls who look better.

after you have 3 other numbers call her and say something out of the ordinary that has nothing to do with your date or her ignoring you.

personally I think it sounds like you are a little bit of a loser coming here asking how to revive this one situation and that's probably why she's not talking to you
Thanks for the tip. I don't get it, I'm a bit of a loser if I want to ask how to revive the situation because I happen to like the girl. I may be a bit of a loser to some people because I guess I am acting clingy to this girl and not going out and meeting other women. But what if I don't want to? I like this girl and would love some help on how I can get her. That would be much appreciated.
Author:  AFCToTheMax [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 2:31 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Mate we get it. You like this girl etc. And say you don't want to get with other girls. We get this either.

But here is the thing. You have to. If you don't do it then you will lose this one.

I'm generally not into the "get more girls" thing, but things are not going your way so you have no other option.
Author:  mcooper112 [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 2:43 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
Mate we get it. You like this girl etc. And say you don't want to get with other girls. We get this either.

But here is the thing. You have to. If you don't do it then you will lose this one.

I'm generally not into the "get more girls" thing, but things are not going your way so you have no other option.
Okay I get it. So basically you are saying the way for met to get this girl is to forget about her, work on attracting other girls and then come back to her later as if nothing happened? Is this the way to do it?
Author:  BITmixit [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 2:50 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
go get 3 other phone numbers first of girls who look better.

after you have 3 other numbers call her and say something out of the ordinary that has nothing to do with your date or her ignoring you.

personally I think it sounds like you are a little bit of a loser coming here asking how to revive this one situation and that's probably why she's not talking to you
Don't 100% listen to this guy, seriously calling another user a loser for coming here to post a question concerning a girl who has obviously experienced buyers remorse or something when most of the posts on this forum concern the same thing. This forum is to help/structure wannabes into becoming better with the tactics/whatever females like to do.

Anyway OP from what it sounds like to me is that you either matched or went ahead of her on the first day on an emotional level perhaps? yes the girl was saying she is really into you and such but thats what girls do ot get attention from guys. She would have said the same shit to loads before. Your job would have been to provide a fishing line as such. I.e. tell her she is pretty but throw a neg in there.

This might be more helpful:

Girl in taxi on the way home (Your date): Woah that was a great date, he seems really into me as well as much as Im into him but wait surely I should be aiming higher then that. A guy that doesn't want me because im not good enough blahblahblahblahdeblahblahblahblahblah

Girl in taxi on the way home (PUA date): Woah that was a great date...but is he really into me? I mean he was really nice and really hot but he kept being off randomly...who did he keep texting? he called me pretty but called me an idiot blahblahblahblahdeblahblahblahblah <THIS IS HOW GIRLS STUPIDLY TRICK THEMSELVES INTO FALLING IN LOVE 90% OF THE TIME.

Unfortunately to get ahead with girls these days is to be an asshole. If you are nice then girls will use you till your worthless...which turns you into an asshole, I've been there.

Only feel/act sympathetic for females when

A) They're good friends.
B) You don't want to fuck them.
C) They're crying. < Do you're fucking best to get her to smile whilst major kinoing = next time she cries, she thinks of you, it makes her smile = she wants your cock.
Author:  mcooper112 [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 3:19 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
Quote:
go get 3 other phone numbers first of girls who look better.

after you have 3 other numbers call her and say something out of the ordinary that has nothing to do with your date or her ignoring you.

personally I think it sounds like you are a little bit of a loser coming here asking how to revive this one situation and that's probably why she's not talking to you
Don't 100% listen to this guy, seriously calling another user a loser for coming here to post a question concerning a girl who has obviously experienced buyers remorse or something when most of the posts on this forum concern the same thing. This forum is to help/structure wannabes into becoming better with the tactics/whatever females like to do.

Anyway OP from what it sounds like to me is that you either matched or went ahead of her on the first day on an emotional level perhaps? yes the girl was saying she is really into you and such but thats what girls do ot get attention from guys. She would have said the same shit to loads before. Your job would have been to provide a fishing line as such. I.e. tell her she is pretty but throw a neg in there.

This might be more helpful:

Girl in taxi on the way home (Your date): Woah that was a great date, he seems really into me as well as much as Im into him but wait surely I should be aiming higher then that. A guy that doesn't want me because im not good enough blahblahblahblahdeblahblahblahblahblah

Girl in taxi on the way home (PUA date): Woah that was a great date...but is he really into me? I mean he was really nice and really hot but he kept being off randomly...who did he keep texting? he called me pretty but called me an idiot blahblahblahblahdeblahblahblahblah <THIS IS HOW GIRLS STUPIDLY TRICK THEMSELVES INTO FALLING IN LOVE 90% OF THE TIME.

Unfortunately to get ahead with girls these days is to be an asshole. If you are nice then girls will use you till your worthless...which turns you into an asshole, I've been there.

Only feel/act sympathetic for females when

A) They're good friends.
B) You don't want to fuck them.
C) They're crying. < Do you're fucking best to get her to smile whilst major kinoing = next time she cries, she thinks of you, it makes her smile = she wants your cock.
This is such a great post! Thanks for this BITmixit! Very helpful. It is making a lot of sense.

You are so right I was ahead of her and had I left her unsure then yes I am sure she would be thinking about me now. And I learnt a lesson for next time!

Now....is there anything I can do to get her interested again after what happened? She was interested at one point (I think!) can she interested again? Have there been cases like this?
Author:  BITmixit [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 5:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Quote:
This is such a great post! Thanks for this BITmixit! Very helpful. It is making a lot of sense.

You are so right I was ahead of her and had I left her unsure then yes I am sure she would be thinking about me now. And I learnt a lesson for next time!

Now....is there anything I can do to get her interested again after what happened? She was interested at one point (I think!) can she interested again? Have there been cases like this?
One of the great pieces of advice is to always with a girl take two steps forward then one back. Leaves them confused as fuck which girls rationalize as "feelings."

Personally from your questions you seem to have oneitis for this girl so as others have stated, go out, have fun, get numbers, flirt, basically realise that there are other women out there not just this girl.

Apart from that leave it till thursday then ping her (send her a short text) something like

You: Yo, (her name), Hows life treating ya, <insert something about the weather or something easily relatable>

What you want to do is hook her by sending her something that she can reply to very easily then pull her into a much more interesting conversation that relates to her life as well. Then she's hooked.

However if she doesn't respond on thursday, try again in a week. If nothing = she's gone.
Author:  TheFury [ Tue Jun 18, 2013 5:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Why did she **FLAKE** on me? DeSpeRate for help!
Did you f-close? If you didn't, then a flake is always a possibility. I've k-closed, and even gotten head from girls on a 1st date from the internet and then they just disappeared. It happens. I don't think you did much wrong here. This stuff just happens. It isn't that common, but unless you f-close, a flake is always a possibility.
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/