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Serious Stress...
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Author:  *otto* [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 3:58 pm ]
Post subject:  Serious Stress...
ok heres my problem its quite a urgent one that i need fixed quickly any advice would be appreciated

ok i have a decent amount of friends in a nice little social circle but suddenly one started taking the piss out of me really like really immaturely of course before i knew it hes best friend joined in thinking it was funny coz i got really pissed off with him annoying me and suddenly it turned into a chain reaction where i had 3/4 of my social circle pissing me off, ive tried taking it as a joke laughing etc or getting slightly violent to make them back off ive tried everything. THIS IS SERIOUSLY LOWERING MY VALUE IN WOMENS EYES! i cant get out of this the only option i can see cleary is to beat the crap out of the one who started it and make friends in a new social circle but the only other social circles are basicly the really popular people wich i could posibly get in with some effort or the really freakish people.

how the hell can i stop the so called "friends" pissing me off ive had plenty of heart to hearts with the guy who started it he promised like 3 times he would stop and that hes sorry ive had enough.

thanks for any help.
Author:  JSmooth [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:24 pm ]
Post subject: 
Wow, I really hate to hear that they kept on, even after your "heart to heart" talks with the people that started it. I can certainly understand your frustration. There really isn't a lot you can do. If you beat them up, they win because they got under your skin. Losing your cool is a DLV in itself because women see you don't control your emotions. Also, firing back at them at this stage is just about futile.

If you've spoken to them like you said and they continued I guess they aren't that great of friends. Its tough to find "true" friends in the world. They don't seem to know the meaning of that.

Build your own social circle with you as the AMOG of the group! :) Hope you have a better day man.
Author:  L.A. Tripp [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:57 pm ]
Post subject: 
You've already shown them that they can get under your skin. And since it is progressing, my advice is to do something you said you could do with a little effort . . . get into a better social circle. These guys aren't listening to your heart to hearts, which translates into not being true friends. You can remain in touch with the one or two true friends of the group that aren't following suit with the group. By getting into another higher value group, you are also raising your value in women's eyes.

Or, you could do like j suggested and just build your own group. It may take a bit longer, but you could work on that too. Then, as he said, you will be the leader of the group, which will raise your value too. I know it's hard either way, but in the long run, it will be worth it for you.
Author:  slight [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 4:58 pm ]
Post subject: 
This reminds me of something that happened to me when I moved to a new school.

I became friends with a few lads after a couple of days but they used to constantly slag me,throw shit at me and just give general abuse whenever they could. I always tried to give it back but its pretty difficult to outwit 5 of them.

So what I did was gradually build up a separate group of friends typically not the cool kids of the class but none the less we all respected each other.

After being in the school for about a 2 months I had a decent set of friends and I was out of the original group but they still gave me hassle.

Until one day I felt a rubber bounce of my the back of my head, it was a heavy ass rubber and it hurt.

I looked around saw one of the lads from the other group laughing and I snapped but in controlled manner I got out of my desk walked over to his and just started laying knees into his face I got about five in before two of his mates jumped out of their desks I went for both of them, but I came off alot worse in the end!

Nothing was said to me for about 2 weeks and after that and then something weird happened, they started asking me questions like " did you see the match?" and " how did you get on in that test?"
Soon they were my bitches and I had no problem with them whatsoever again!

Morale of the story: leave the group your in, form a new group (let them know this) then if you bump into one of your old group members wait for abuse then go all out and dont stop until either your down or all five of them are down!
Author:  xTxHxExJxOxKxExRx [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:28 pm ]
Post subject: 
i had the same situation, heres what i did...

when i was constantly being picked on in front of woman in my social group i just left it and just started floating around chatting with pretty much everyone, eventually i got involved in another social circle and my old one missed me( lol i was gone from my old one for so long they thought i died ) to do this though just act as if your old friends don't exist, no waving, or letting clear notice come to their attention (as in no "hey guys whats up") after about 2 weeks start greeting them again and it will usually stop, plus you also have a second social circle you can go to now if it happens again

hoped this helped (BTW im still in school so im not sure if you can just go talk to anyone and join or make a new social circle though)
Author:  Rye Lee [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
I used to hang out with the "cool crowd" up until mid grade 7, then I got tired of them always being assholes. They weren't just assholes to me, but each other and most of the time they didn't even really like each other because they were always making fun of each other and a lot of hate got built up.

I decided it was retarded after them going to town on me one day and so I told them to go fuck themselves and then went and hung out with some other guys I knew. From then on I never hung out with the "cool kids" again, but that definitely put me on their bad list and I got shit on a lot for it.

Unfortunately high school is shitty when all the other kids have no social skills, but you just have to make the best of it you can. Find some kids that you like that aren't assholes and hang out with them and either your original group will drop it and start being ok again, at which point you can decide if you want to give them another chance, or you just hang out with new people. You don't want to be the guy that is everyone's punching bag, so you can't stay where you are.
Author:  Roads [ Mon Jan 07, 2008 9:45 pm ]
Post subject: 
Remember that fighting is DLV. But if you absolutely must fight, pick on the apparent alpha of the group and go at it with him one on one. Do NOT fight the entire group...instead, instigate with only the alpha. Say things like "you can treat your buddies over there like shit but I'm not gonna take it from you. Guys think of all the shit he's given you...I'm gonna clear that up for you right now with him". Make it clear you are about to fight the alpha with your body language and eye contact. Make it apparent to all of your old "buddies" that it is a one on one, between you and the alpha. This gives you a lot better chance of only fighting him instead of the whole group. If you win, you have a chance of supplanting him as the group alpha if your frame is strong enough. If you lose, you still might get respect for standing up to the bully, even though you instigated the fight. A third possibility is that because the alpha has so much more to lose than you in a fight, he may back down, in which case you gain some respect and he loses some.
Author:  *otto* [ Tue Jan 08, 2008 4:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
thanks guys what im probably going to do is what joker said wander round more my social circle is pretty big (but they all hang out in 1 or 2 areas wich is kinda gay) so ill just wander round like joker said some lessons i might end up bieng on my own for a while which kinda sucks. just to give u a example of the immature shit they do today they were continuously pulling my chord on my hoodie trying to get it out i mean wtf a couple switched to my side but i really need to change anyway there boring as fuck and lastly there bringing down my value so quickly suddenly im getting 1 or 2 freaks brave enough to come up to me and do this shit

if you wana hear something good though loads of girls have started noticing me and looking slightly curios as soon as i had changed my body language and stuff i have yet to approach many but ive started to get to talk to way more in classes now unfortuntly there only hb3 or 4 wich is quite bad but theres one that is a hb7 but she has a boyfriend ... i really don't get much luck lol but the ones that seem curios are hb7-hb9.5 so if i play my cards right i might get to enjoy myself for once
Author:  L.A. Tripp [ Tue Jan 08, 2008 7:00 pm ]
Post subject: 
There is another idea you can play with. Become the bad boy. The rebel, sort of.

Since you're changing your body language now, which is good, and getting girls attention that way, try this. Work on your inner game and build up your confidence higher than the confidence of your peers in that group. Make sure you're truly confident. Once you get that down, the girls WILL notice.

Don't be afraid to step out from the crowd. Be your own person and don't just depend on the group for your social proof. If you can handle this, it can make a dramatic impact on your entire social life.

You will end up having guys flock to you, girl flock to you, and you will be the leader of them. When you have THAT much confidence in YOURSELF, it turns into a magnet.
Author:  PrettyBoy41 [ Tue Jan 08, 2008 7:07 pm ]
Post subject: 
if it was me, ya id probably beat down that little bitch that started it, but you may end up losing the group. so i dunno, hopefully you can find a more rational way of handling it. maybe backfire it. if there are women around, tell a story about one of the guys, starting with "dude remember when you got herpes? hahaha oh man you have to hear this story..." its a dick move, but you gotta do what you gotta do.
Author:  L.A. Tripp [ Tue Jan 08, 2008 7:25 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
if there are women around, tell a story about one of the guys, starting with "dude remember when you got herpes? hahaha oh man you have to hear this story..." its a dick move, but you gotta do what you gotta do.
Hey man, actually I wouldn't call that a dick move in this situation. It's a good idea.
Author:  Valence [ Tue Jan 08, 2008 9:22 pm ]
Post subject: 
There is a difference between playing around and being hurtful. Giving each other crap for things that deserve crap is a friendly thing to do.

You did something silly, you got to get called out on it. It is more of a social check than anything. This is when it is done privatly amongst the group. Heckling eachother.

When it is done outside of the group to others to put you down, it is a different story. That is when they are trying to make themselves look better in front of others eyes. It is also not acceptable when it gets the point it bothers you and you express it, and they continue on.

Friends will give eachother crap. It is bonding and part of the game we play with girls (teasing).
Author:  PrettyBoy41 [ Wed Jan 09, 2008 2:15 am ]
Post subject: 
ya thats true, try laughing it off and say somethin like, im ALWAYS the target gosh! and just kinda play with it, and if it keeps goin, and everyone is laughing again, just be like, alright enough about me, whats your story? (obviously directed at target)
Author:  *otto* [ Wed Jan 09, 2008 5:08 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
if there are women around, tell a story about one of the guys, starting with "dude remember when you got herpes? hahaha oh man you have to hear this story..." its a dick move, but you gotta do what you gotta do.
nice idea but no one will believe it could possibly make something more believable up. also just to keep you guys in contact with whats going on basically every one has backed off a bit and so has the main guy but he still annoyed me once or twice today and hes girlfriend annoyed me too but yeah its getting better ive decided to stick with them for a while unless they start again most of my social circle are going to Disneyland on a trip for 2-3 days or 5 possibly but hopefully then i should be able to make friends with a couple of people that are still at school and when the rest of there social circle gets back i will be more accepted because im friends with people in there social circle, good idea? also if i got him to start on me would that make him the one who cant control hes emotions and be the one that loses value coz i really like the sound of it.
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