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| 24yo virgin https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=6&t=119384 |
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| Author: | FastLearner [ Sun Oct 30, 2011 8:00 pm ] |
| Post subject: | 24yo virgin |
Hey everyone! I'm 24 and I'm still a virgin and never kissed a girl. I think the reason for this is that I've always been very ambitious with my studies and my sport and wanted to minimize any distractions and so I never really tried anything with girls. Also, I didn't go out to many parties. I regret this, but there's no way to turn back time. I started putting more effort into this 1 year ago, but I'm still pretty much of an AFC. The girls I like are usually pretty smart and ambitious and usually rather shy. I can definitely build a connection with this kind of girl and entertain them, but I struggle getting things to the next level. I've had quite a few lunch dates lately, but nothing more. Actually at the beginning of this year I had one-itis with a housemate and I took her out to dinner and cinema but I never tried any kino or more so she lost her interest and started dating someone else. She later told me that she liked me, but the fact that I never made a move turned her off. What can I do? My confidence with girls is obviously very low since almost everyone in my age had more experience with this than me. As I said, I can make girls comfortable around me, make them laugh etc. but when I'm alone with them I can't take things to the next level. In particular, I struggle to build up body contact. I never hug a girl, except if she initiates the hugging... I know the PUA stuff from the theoretical side and I made progress in being more cocky and funny, but still no real progress. Please help me, guys! I'm really desperate to get this part of my life fixed. |
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| Author: | thedocta [ Sun Oct 30, 2011 8:11 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: 24yo virgin |
You have difficulty taking it forward because you are afraid of looking awkward and being rejected, but you can't become confident without having practice. Therefore, your first (practice) attempts are destined to be screw ups. Accept it. If you can accept that your attempts are going to fail, and prepare yourself mentally for the fact that this is OK, then there is no longer any uncertainty or anything to be afraid of. It will give you that freedom you need to relax and experiment, and allow you to start getting some much needed practice. You are obviously a smart guy who has shown a lot of dedication to your studies. But being good at school doesn't make you happy -- girls do. Think of improving your skills with girls as the most important class of your life, and apply that same dedication that you have to your studies to succeeding at this. The art to winning girls is more about conquering your own internal fears and increasing self confidence than anything else. |
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| Author: | Rough Operator [ Mon Oct 31, 2011 3:51 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Sounds like your sticking point is escalation, and I had this too for a long while, I just didn't feel confident enough to escalate kino. I started off with small things, like if I was meeting a girl for coffee I'd just extend my arms and assume she would hug me or I'd say "Hey, gimme a hug" or something. From then on I'd do little touches whilst I was talking to emphasise a point and whatnot. All this stuff sounds very innocent and small, but it's a good first step to build confidence and to get touching something that is normal and natural. Also, if you touch someone's shoulder or put your arm around them whilst looking into their eyes, that's kind of a high pressure moment and can insinuate your desires a little too much. If you put your arm around someone, look away from them casually, it stops it from becoming too much of a big step in intimacy. In addition to this you can do little things like pick something out of her hair, if she's comfortable with you touching her hair you can assume things are going well. Doing these things won't seem natural at first and you might worry that she'll notice that you feel unnatural, but it's never a big of a deal in reality as it is in your head. Most of the time girls I barely know are perfectly happy to hug me and I can even kiss them pretty quickly these days. Just fake it till you make it; you're a guy who is comfortable with intimacy and you like to touch people and be touched. |
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| Author: | 0uch [ Mon Oct 31, 2011 10:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
^^^ agree with the above post. Your sticking point right now is escalation. You have to be dominant, sexual and lead. (act like she is your girlfriend). All the kino your doing is no big deal to you. Is a normal part of your life. Be careful with this though. Baby step this. Here is how I do it: I start small with lots of push/pull. I will grab her, then be the first break contact. From here I will just built and have her comfortable leaning into me as I hold her. From there making out, to all the way to sex. Kino is extremely important. It gets them sexually attracted to you. On weekends, there not gonna be hitting up there "guy friends" to hang out. For that, they got girlfriends. Instead, there gonna be hitting up guys there sexually attracted so they can get fucked. Women are extremely horny no matter how "shy" they are. Is your job to bring out that sexual side out them. Once you can do this, you don't have to worry about looking "needy" or anything. I call girls up on midnight on saturdays when there already out. Even if they can't come, they don't get creeped out by it. WE still talk and hang out some other time. |
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| Author: | FastLearner [ Sun Nov 06, 2011 11:27 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks a lot for your suggestions! Yeah, I really think I just need to "get laid" pretty soon, to finally get some experience. At the moment there are two girls I think I could have a chance with: One housemate (a very sweet Chinese girl, but probably very conservative - she would definitely be "girlfriend material" ) and another girl I'm doing a university project with. The other alternative would be to try my luck at parties, clubs etc. but I'm not really good at dancing... |
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