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She broke up with me all of a sudden?!
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Author:  Little Panda [ Thu Jan 14, 2010 5:54 pm ]
Post subject:  She broke up with me all of a sudden?!
Alright, this is something very serious to me and it makes my soul hurt. She broke up with me and wants me to stay out of her life.

What were the reasons for this break up? It doesn't really matter, because I don't want her back. As a matter of fact - I need help with moving on instead. It's better that we are separated - she's not my type anyways.

Anybody that has had some serious break ups and feels like sharing the story of how they moved on? I need some hardcore advice here.

Oh and by the way: I do NOT feel like sarging and flirting with other women is a solution. This is because if I get rejected only ONCE - I'm gonna take it very very seriously and it's just gonna hurt even more

So please, other pieces of advice except for clubbing/hanging around in bars and sarging women.

Thank you in advance,

Zentrode.
Author:  Fender43 [ Fri Jan 15, 2010 6:27 am ]
Post subject: 
hey man i know how you feel its hard to move on but its not a big part of your life, your gonna have to move on pretty quickly, dont let her win, go out their and get another girl 10000 times better than her.
Author:  Chief [ Fri Jan 15, 2010 7:35 am ]
Post subject:  Re: She broke up with me all of a sudden?!
Quote:
Oh and by the way: I do NOT feel like sarging and flirting with other women is a solution. This is because if I get rejected only ONCE - I'm gonna take it very very seriously and it's just gonna hurt even more
Too fucking bad. Life is hard. Man up.

Life is always going to be full of rejection if you are going to seek acceptance. Get used to it. Pain is the price to pay for pleasure.

You know what to do.
Author:  Jezebel [ Fri Jan 15, 2010 11:11 am ]
Post subject: 
I disagree with both of you Fender and Chief. Sarging and getting another woman isn’t the only way to get over a bad break up! In fact that’s the most superficial way to do it, because when doing that you are just trying to replace one girl with another, and that is pretty much IMPOSIBLE.

There’s nothing bad and unmanly to actually give yourself some time to feel sad, especially if the girl was someone special for you. But don’t overdo it. You need to learn that your own happiness doesn’t depend on you being with a girl.
There’s so much more to come… good and bad. I am pretty sure that is not going to be the last time when you are going through that kind of thing.
I don’t know the background of the story, neither I know you, but I would say just try to enjoy every step of your journey. I like to think that for most things (at least the major ones) that happen to us, there’s a reason and they are leading us to the next thing we are supposed to see/handle/enjoy. One thing is for sure, this kind of moments shape your personality …maybe that was one of the steps that you had to take to actually become the man who your future girlfriend will fall in love with. (And now I sound so romantic that I start feeling a bit stupid :D )

Give yourself some time to realize the things that you need to and then step outside one more time and enjoy yourself. Try to look at all of it in a positive way.

Cheers
Jez
Author:  Little Panda [ Fri Jan 15, 2010 7:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
Alright guys, I have read your replies. Here's the deal though: I hate this girl. I really do. Even if she BEGGED me to come back - I would decline.

But my problem now is: I occasionally miss her. Why? Because I think of her 24/7 and I remember all the good times we had. All those memories just get to me, you know?

I can't focus in class, I can't focus when I'm home with my family and I can't control my fucking dreams. I constantly think of her and it fucks up my whole life.

This girl is in my college. And you know what she does? For example, if I'm sitting next to a guy at lunch - she walks up to him and KISSES HIM ON THE LIPS. Also, she starts cuddling with my friends and other people around me.

She is doing a lot of jealousy plots against me. And the worst part? It fucking works. It makes me feel like shit.
Author:  Reo [ Fri Jan 15, 2010 11:28 pm ]
Post subject: 
Pull yourself together man your opening post was just sickening to read. You're looking for someone to cry with you, not gonna be me and yes you do need to go out and talk to other women because the current one ain't about shit. No good is gonna come of you sitting home feeling sorry for yourself.
Author:  _Illusionist_ [ Sat Jan 16, 2010 8:16 am ]
Post subject: 
The last LTR that I brutally got out of, I only gut-wrenching sickness for about 4hours.. then I was fine - this was a 7month relationship too!.. but I very quickly realised the she just isn't worth a second of my time.

I was in the same boat as you - I openly hated this girl. I still do.
I even find myself thinking about what she did to me, and it boils my blood; I took more of a "Chief" approach to it.

I know it must be drving you nuts that you see most days, but thats the start of your challenge, you have to learn to bring yourself above her - ease yourself back into the sarging scene. YOU physically have to tell yourself that you can rise above her pityful games.

she seems like she is just plain human trash. What is the point of obsessing over someone like that??? It's the same conclusion that I began to believe, life seemed a lit more bearable after that.
Author:  Haash [ Sat Jan 16, 2010 5:19 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I disagree with both of you Fender and Chief. Sarging and getting another woman isn’t the only way to get over a bad break up! In fact that’s the most superficial way to do it, because when doing that you are just trying to replace one girl with another, and that is pretty much IMPOSIBLE.

There’s nothing bad and unmanly to actually give yourself some time to feel sad, especially if the girl was someone special for you. But don’t overdo it. You need to learn that your own happiness doesn’t depend on you being with a girl.
There’s so much more to come… good and bad. I am pretty sure that is not going to be the last time when you are going through that kind of thing.
I don’t know the background of the story, neither I know you, but I would say just try to enjoy every step of your journey. I like to think that for most things (at least the major ones) that happen to us, there’s a reason and they are leading us to the next thing we are supposed to see/handle/enjoy. One thing is for sure, this kind of moments shape your personality …maybe that was one of the steps that you had to take to actually become the man who your future girlfriend will fall in love with. (And now I sound so romantic that I start feeling a bit stupid :D )

Give yourself some time to realize the things that you need to and then step outside one more time and enjoy yourself. Try to look at all of it in a positive way.

Cheers
Jez

She has no idea what she is talking about. Slucking may be a way for women but unless you are a guy and have been though a break up (I have recently been through one so I know) you would not know the best way to get out of it. Sarging and meeting other women is by far the fastest way of getting out of this.

I agree with Chief & Fender. rep points for you guys !
Author:  Little Panda [ Sat Jan 16, 2010 5:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Okay, it seems like the majority agrees on the fact that sarging is the best solution after all.

This is what I'm planning on doing:

*Construct a whole new Avatar. Getting a haircut, new outfits etc.
*Sarge a lot more than usual.
*Always keep myself occupied so I don't think of her.
*Have fun with friends as much as possible

.... You get the point. If I do all the things in the list - will it help me heal in like... less than a month or so?

Just trying so somehow calculate how long it will take. Don't want to expect much and then get disappointed if I'm still not over her after a year or something. Really hope that doesn't happen.
Author:  Marc [ Sun Jan 17, 2010 1:56 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Getting a haircut, new outfits etc.
A Hair cut and new outfits is a Great idea !! 8) 8)

BTW.... Nothing happens all of a sudden, She probably must have been thinking of it for weeks only you couldn't read the signs.

But I think now you know what to do hence without wasting a single day just go out there and start living the gift- Life.
Author:  Marc [ Sun Jan 17, 2010 9:51 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Alright guys, I have read your replies. Here's the deal though: I hate this girl. I really do. Even if she BEGGED me to come back - I would decline.

But my problem now is: I occasionally miss her. Why? Because I think of her 24/7 and I remember all the good times we had. All those memories just get to me, you know?

I can't focus in class, I can't focus when I'm home with my family and I can't control my fucking dreams. I constantly think of her and it fucks up my whole life.

This girl is in my college. And you know what she does? For example, if I'm sitting next to a guy at lunch - she walks up to him and KISSES HIM ON THE LIPS. Also, she starts cuddling with my friends and other people around me.

She is doing a lot of jealousy plots against me. And the worst part? It fucking works. It makes me feel like shit.

Today while I was infield for some reason I just remembered your post. Man your opening lines just makes my tears my heart. I came back and then read this part again and it just makes me sick in the stomach.

I'm not very emotional but I must say that your post stuck with me even while I was talking to a Hot Brunett.

Man up, Get better and write a follow up to this post..... Some girls could really be bitches !
Author:  Narlodapanda [ Sun Jan 17, 2010 10:42 pm ]
Post subject: 
Grats man, honestly it sounds like you know what your doing, In my case ive been through two horrible breakups and now I dont actualy feel sad or band when I get rejected, It just makes me want to try harder on the next girl, and whne I guy is bieing an AMOG asshole it just adds fuel to the fire and makes me want to... try harder, and that my friend is the key, the best way you can get back at this girl would be to find a nice piece of arm candy at the club and show her off if you want to, or just realize that there are so many new girls out there. Remember there are ALWAYS bigger fish in the sea, I keep hearing this saying, there will always be guys who are better, faster, stronger and smarter than you, well having said that, I realized that the same goes for women, your ex might have been the one (not saying she was) but there will always be a better girl out there, I mean theres 2 billion of them on the planet!

Keep truckin man :)

-Nar
Author:  Little Panda [ Mon Jan 18, 2010 4:15 pm ]
Post subject: 
Guys, your replies have been very helpful. I have to say that it feels A LOT easier today than it did last week.

I got a new haircut and some accessories. Just those few changes have increased my confidence and I feel like I'm on top of the world today.

About her... Well, she keeps doing her fucking jealosy plots and kisses random guys and friends around me. I just feel that this behavior is nothing but immature. It's not hurting me anymore actually. I don't give a damn about her.

Don't give up on this thread yet just because everything seems fine. For all I know, this confidence and these happy feelings could just be temporary. I will get back in a few days and write more.

But for now - I'm feeling good. Life's great.

I appreciate all the helpful replies so far!
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