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| SP: I come off as an asshole when I'm not trying to be https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=56364 |
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| Author: | selous [ Sat Nov 21, 2009 7:16 pm ] |
| Post subject: | SP: I come off as an asshole when I'm not trying to be |
I'm stuck at this point in my game. This is kind of a core inner game issue I'm working on. I've gotten the "you're an asshole"line enough or "you're being mean" from targets, wings, and even female friends when I'm not trying to be. I sincerely don't know what I'm doing wrong because my intent is not be mean but off the cuff and spontaneous. I've always had a sarcastic streak in my personality that comes off as too harsh and I have been actively working to not use those patterns because I know it doesn't lead towards success with women. When I'm out sarging I don't intend to be a jerk or make statements that turn the girl off but I do it anyway. When I'm not being an ass and I say what I'm thinking I get responses like "thats the sweetest thing ever." However that tends to be a lot more rare. Something I thought while writing this is re-framing all my statements through a positive "censor" before I say something? But that seems like a lot monumental effort for someone whose motivation when going out is to be a cool interesting guy out to have a good time and give people a positive experience they will remember. Has anyone else had this issue or know of practices to stop doing this? |
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| Author: | johnyp03 [ Sat Nov 21, 2009 8:59 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Are you sure that this is a bad thing? It depends on how the target says, "you are an asshole". When I'm out with a girl, I know I'm doing a good job when the girl starts saying "You're mean" or "You're such an asshole", and I can play it off as a joke. If the target is seriously saying, "Wow, you're an asshole", that's different. It's really tough to say what to do out of context, but this is how I deal with this situation. I'll either justify my statement to which the target called me an asshole, or back off and apologize. More times than not though, I'll stick to my guns and justify everything that I say. I think giving advice would be a lot easier if you gave a specific situation where a girl called you an asshole. Either way, best of luck. |
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