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Desperately need advice, SEX.
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Author:  kommodo [ Thu Jan 01, 2009 8:00 pm ]
Post subject:  Desperately need advice, SEX.
Straight to the point. I'm a virgin (18 years of age), but I have a gf. And when we want to have sex I always start off with foreplay (fingering, going down on her), which is normal and goes off without a problem. But after about twenty minutes of that, when it's getting time for real sex, I just can't get my dick hard. After about 5-10 minutes of fiddeling with my dick I can get it pretty hard, but still not as hard as it normally gets when I'm alone.
Then when I try to get it in her it just won't get in, I think it has something to do with the condom, I can't feel a thing with the damn bastard. And once it failed my dick immediately gets soft and its impossible to get it hard again without using a new condom, and then I have to start all over again. But with the same outcome.

This has happened a few times now and I'm getting pretty worried. Not to mention the embaracement :oops: . Can you guys please give me some tips or advice, anything really.
Author:  Mithos [ Thu Jan 01, 2009 11:59 pm ]
Post subject: 
Same thing happened to me on my first time dude, my advice:

1) Dont jerk off too much (limit yourself to once or twice a week)

2) Dont stress it

3)Make sure your warm enough.)nothing kills a erection like a shot of cold air)
Author:  Lyph [ Fri Jan 02, 2009 6:05 am ]
Post subject: 
Hey man i used to have the same trouble with girls, I only recently figured what i needed to do.

1. Do not stress over anything, stress causes you to panic and not get hard so dont think about it and just go with it.

2. Use a durex condom, I will never fuck with anything less! There are some with a numbing agent I used those at first and got used to it all and now i fuck for the same times but with a sensithin-Ribbed (experience tells they love them)

3. Have her help you, i have had lots of success with bj's and holding\rubbing tight against her(they can enjoy this too :))

4.Keep from pron for before you go at it and dont do the dirty just beforehand. I like to the day before because i feel i can last longer that way. But again dont worry :).

Finally i found that breathing deep help's, probably because it calms i think.

Anywho, these are my tips i was in your boat last summer with my now ex GF. Have fun, nothing feels quit like it and enjoy your first time, I have fond memories of mine :)
Author:  Munroe (MUNROE) [ Fri Jan 02, 2009 7:30 am ]
Post subject: 
Here is the real question:

Do you have this problem when you are alone?
Author:  Lyph [ Fri Jan 02, 2009 7:41 am ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
Here is the real question:

Do you have this problem when you are alone?
Yeah man he said he was hard alone. Read his post again :P
Author:  kommodo [ Fri Jan 02, 2009 12:21 pm ]
Post subject: 
Thanks for the advice so far,,
hah and I don't have a prob when I'm alone, it works just fine :wink:

I think it might have been nerves getting the better of me, and her room is pretty cold. So it might have been a combination of the two. But keep the advice coming guys.
Author:  Sutko [ Fri Jan 02, 2009 5:20 pm ]
Post subject: 
Easiest way to relieve the stress is to remind yourself that sex isn't really a big deal. I mean, we're convinced our whole lives that it's the be-all and end-all of human interaction, when in reality it's just one small part of it. Think of it as being on the same scale as a really nice conversation, or a really funny joke. It's a great way to connect with someone, sure, but it's not everything.

So just relax, keep on trying (because it sounds like you're doing the right things, you're just thinking too much), and enjoy the moment. I mean, nothing looks better than a naked woman in your own bed. If you have a bit of trouble staying hard, just go down on her some more. There ain't a woman I've met that would complain about getting too much head. While you're going down on her, get yourself hard again, and give 'er another shot. Repeat as necessary!

Good luck man.
Author:  Lyph [ Sat Jan 03, 2009 3:16 am ]
Post subject: 
Shit i have an idea! :)

Take a shower with her before hand, only the bestest and hardest sex come's from taking a shower. :) Feel her of make out get her nice and wet and take her somewhere soft and get it on :) Oh and make sure you leave the condom ( a Durex I'm sure right? :P) where your going to have your fun, i know fetching one has ended bad before.

Tell me how this works out for you, it did for me :) :)
Author:  howyoudoing [ Sat Jan 03, 2009 12:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
1. Don't think about getting it in so much, just concentrate on the part of her that gets you hard the fastest. As an example for me it is the breasts, whenever i start thinking too much i just go straight to them lol.

2. Make her put her legs right back so her pussy is facing on an angle that is better suited for you to 'get it in'. Make sure she is decently wet, either naturally or get the ol lube. Is it her first time as well?
Author:  FNB [ Sat Jan 03, 2009 1:38 pm ]
Post subject: 
I would say that the biggest reason why you have this problem in the first place is that you are a virgin. Not directly that but more especially your own beliefs are doing this to you. I think that you could be afraid that she will think that you are bad if you are not good in bed. The reason why you can't get a hard erection like the one that you easily can get at home is that you are thinking too much. You are not relaxed. Therefore I would say that you should relax. Sex is not the goal of your interaction together nor is it the end of the interaction. Instead it's part of your common time together.
Author:  kommodo [ Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:49 pm ]
Post subject: 
It's her first time as well. And I'm not worried about her thinking I'm bad in bed or anything like that. I think that I'm just not relaxed enough. Don't really know why though, since I always feel perfectly comfortable with her...
Author:  FNB [ Sat Jan 03, 2009 3:43 pm ]
Post subject: 
Quote:
I think that I'm just not relaxed enough. Don't really know why though, since I always feel perfectly comfortable with her...
Many times we humans tend to be nervous and can't really be relaxed in situations that are new and unfamiliar. One other thing is that you are comfortable with her but are you really comfortable with your own sexuality? Be naked with a hot girl can make you nervous as well. I don't say that it's she that makes you nervous but that situation. One of the biggest problems with AFCs are that they are not comfortable with their own sexuality and don't see themselves as naturally sexual males.
Author:  kommodo [ Sat Jan 03, 2009 10:34 pm ]
Post subject: 
I'm not uncomfortable with my sexuality since I'm pretty damn good looking and so is she :) . And I'm definitely not queer or anything if you might be implieing that :D . I think it's because it's a new situation for me (and her), hope it will get better with time and experience. Thanks for the help so far mate.
Author:  Kalel [ Sat Jan 10, 2009 8:53 am ]
Post subject: 
It's probably just a mixture of nerves and guilt. Do you come from a religious background or have an overprotective mother or something like that? Most erection problems are psychological.

Why don't you try a supplement or something, that might stop you from going soft so quickly. As for it not going in, you need to get some moisture on the tip of the condom first if it's not lubricated. Either rub it in her juices first before trying to enter, or get some ky lube. Also since you're a virgin remember to leave some slack at the tip of the condom or it might break under pressure.
Author:  Drezdin [ Thu Jan 15, 2009 2:12 pm ]
Post subject: 
maybe your gay? j/k
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