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| Avoiding serious relationships https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=33780 |
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| Author: | bob popular [ Thu Dec 04, 2008 9:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Avoiding serious relationships |
I need some advise on a sticking point that I can't find much good info on. I just came out of two LTR's in a row and want to be alone for a (long) while, but not completely alone . . . I'm pretty good at pulling chicks, but they seem to totally fall in love with me. One chick who I slept with on the first date (coffee at her pad) even had a toothbrush waiting for me the next morning. So my question is, how do I make it clear from day one that I either just want a ONS or mutiple, casual relationships? I never kiss her ass, talk about love or romance (except maybe that I'm damaged and don't believe in love any more) and my game is totally direct, largely depending upon disscussions about sex. I know that there's a way to be open and fair and still get sex, so please tell me what works for you. |
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| Author: | BIGRED [ Sat Dec 06, 2008 6:56 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
after attraction is built you need to tell her how you feel, let her kno exactly what you want as far as relationship wise |
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| Author: | bob popular [ Sat Dec 06, 2008 7:10 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks, Red. Now, just to clarify: I should wait until after the first sex to explain my views and not from the first interaction? I heard an interview with Savoy for pickup podcast where he said the same thing, that you should wait until after the relationship becomes sexual to tell her that you are seeing other women, but am afraid that she might convince herself that we are building an exclusive relationship. Should I approach her first or wait until she begins talking about how the relationship should continue? Do you have any "lines" as an example of how to do this? I don't have any problems with opening, etc., but have no idea how to run this part of the game. |
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| Author: | BIGRED [ Sun Dec 07, 2008 7:25 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
I would just tell her right before sex that you want her to know that you dont want to really rush things as far as emotionaly wise. If she then procedes to try to stop sex tell her that every passionate relationship that you have had started passionatly, you just want to take your time. |
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| Author: | jlizzle [ Sun Dec 07, 2008 10:32 am ] |
| Post subject: | |
You mentioned "One chick who I slept with on the first date." She shouldn't have expectations of a serious relationship after sleeping with you if it was on the first date. Therefore you should save yourself the hassle of telling her your seeing other women till after you sleep with her. However if she asks you before sleeping with her if you are seeing other women then you don't have much of a choice. |
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| Author: | bob popular [ Wed Dec 10, 2008 6:31 pm ] |
| Post subject: | |
Thanks for the help guys. I was away for a few days of training (work-related, not PUA) and had time to think. I came to two conclusions: 1. Relationship management is like every other aspect of the game--you can learn and get advise, but only experience and fighting through the stress a few times will get you to mastery. I'm not afraid to approach, escalate, close, etc. and even enjoy my mastery of those aspects that used to frighten and confuse me so much, so I can tackle this final aspect, too and then laugh at how easy it is to manage women in comparison to the way it is now. 2. Even though there are no magic pills, I believe I have made a breakthough. I'm going to emulate the true masters of relationship management--WOMEN! I'm going to think like a woman every time I end a relationship or tell a girl that I'm seeing other women. First of all, they're always brutally honest. They don't try to hurt you (at least not always) but they don't sugar-coat it either. They just make the best decision for them and say it matter-of-factly. Quick and painful, but they know we'll get over it. Next came the realization that my girlfriends, if they had decided to end things with me, wouldn't give a fuck about my feelings or hurting me! I mean, I overheard the girl that fell in love with me after the first-date sex advising a friend of hers to tell some guy that she fucked over the weekend "Listen, what's the big deal? Just tell him that he was a new flavor you were trying out for the weekend and that was it! If he has a problem with it, tell him he should learn to fuck and get a life and you might give him a second chance sometime when you're too lazy to go out and get a real man, but don't count on it!" It seems I have one last "nice-guy" aspect to get rid of and have been making this problem seem a whole lot harder than it is. |
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