PUA Forum :: Some Sticking Point

I'm currently having a lot of trouble attracting women, at all. I recently got out of a relationship that took a psychological toll on me and threw me into some seriously self-destructive habits. One of which is an incessant need for a rebound. As you can imagine, it hasn't been going well for me. I've probably had five different girls that have shown initial interest that cooled off. In fact, while out last night, a friend's fling mentioned she wouldn't "hook me up" with her friend because she deserves better than a "fuck boy." Clearly her perception of me is that I am on the rebound, looking for something casual and without strings attached, and somewhere in there is the communication that I see women as sexual objects for my own gratification and disposal. It's become clear I'm not in the right state of mind. I definitely have been pursuing women in a more liberal, skip the qualifying them and let's hook up, manner. Which essentially means my standards have dropped through the floor. I've thought about ways to readjust my inner game and possibly my circulating reputation, and have concluded that I need to take a step back from the intention of hooking up with anyone until this neediness wears off. I'm not sure if that means beginning to treat women as friends, or valuing my interactions with them whether it leads to something more or not, or what. I just need a solution to whatever I'm doing now, which seems to be driving women away, and I think on some level women are sensing my willingness to get physical. It's not a good look.

Author:	methodology [ Sun Aug 28, 2016 8:13 pm ]
Post subject:	Some Sticking Point
I'm currently having a lot of trouble attracting women, at all. I recently got out of a relationship that took a psychological toll on me and threw me into some seriously self-destructive habits. One of which is an incessant need for a rebound. As you can imagine, it hasn't been going well for me. I've probably had five different girls that have shown initial interest that cooled off. In fact, while out last night, a friend's fling mentioned she wouldn't "hook me up" with her friend because she deserves better than a "fuck boy." Clearly her perception of me is that I am on the rebound, looking for something casual and without strings attached, and somewhere in there is the communication that I see women as sexual objects for my own gratification and disposal. It's become clear I'm not in the right state of mind. I definitely have been pursuing women in a more liberal, skip the qualifying them and let's hook up, manner. Which essentially means my standards have dropped through the floor. I've thought about ways to readjust my inner game and possibly my circulating reputation, and have concluded that I need to take a step back from the intention of hooking up with anyone until this neediness wears off. I'm not sure if that means beginning to treat women as friends, or valuing my interactions with them whether it leads to something more or not, or what. I just need a solution to whatever I'm doing now, which seems to be driving women away, and I think on some level women are sensing my willingness to get physical. It's not a good look.

Author:	Andrrei [ Mon Aug 29, 2016 2:19 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Some Sticking Point
Quote: I'm currently having a lot of trouble attracting women, at all. I recently got out of a relationship that took a psychological toll on me and threw me into some seriously self-destructive habits. One of which is an incessant need for a rebound. As you can imagine, it hasn't been going well for me. I've probably had five different girls that have shown initial interest that cooled off. In fact, while out last night, a friend's fling mentioned she wouldn't "hook me up" with her friend because she deserves better than a "fuck boy." Clearly her perception of me is that I am on the rebound, looking for something casual and without strings attached, and somewhere in there is the communication that I see women as sexual objects for my own gratification and disposal. It's become clear I'm not in the right state of mind. I definitely have been pursuing women in a more liberal, skip the qualifying them and let's hook up, manner. Which essentially means my standards have dropped through the floor. I've thought about ways to readjust my inner game and possibly my circulating reputation, and have concluded that I need to take a step back from the intention of hooking up with anyone until this neediness wears off. I'm not sure if that means beginning to treat women as friends, or valuing my interactions with them whether it leads to something more or not, or what. I just need a solution to whatever I'm doing now, which seems to be driving women away, and I think on some level women are sensing my willingness to get physical. It's not a good look. Your problem is that you have a realy bad analization skill. Try to analize situations differently and only on the moment, forget about what happening, when you see a girl try to make a strategy to pick her up, be calm, relaxed, confident and take it slowly. Does'nt matter what womens think or not, if they like you for the moment or not, just talk with them and that's all, and stop making so bad analization because you just hit yourself.

Author:	methodology [ Mon Aug 29, 2016 6:33 am ]
Post subject:	Re: Some Sticking Point
So you're suggesting I need to stay present, in the moment, enjoy the encounter, and not over think it? I think my solution so far is that I have this undeniable void in my life that my ex filled by consistently texting, being around, etc. I've tried to fill that with a rebound but it isn't working. Instead I need to develop some more meaningful relationships/connections to patch up this emptiness and then I can focus from a place of abundance.

Author:	Heywood Jablowme [ Mon Aug 29, 2016 3:06 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Some Sticking Point
Quote: So you're suggesting I need to stay present, in the moment, enjoy the encounter, and not over think it? I think my solution so far is that I have this undeniable void in my life that my ex filled by consistently texting, being around, etc. I've tried to fill that with a rebound but it isn't working. Instead I need to develop some more meaningful relationships/connections to patch up this emptiness and then I can focus from a place of abundance. It's okay to stop thinking about her. She's not thinking about YOU! I promise her 'empty' spot is being rammed full. Just go out there and bang some girls. The greatest obstacle you'll need to overcome, is being the man you used to be.

Author:	methodology [ Mon Aug 29, 2016 10:50 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Some Sticking Point
Lol well she seems to be messaging me a lot without me replying back. That's probably part of the problem. I think that yes, a big realization I made was that I identified with this "hurt, defected self" instead of assuming that the way this girl viewed me wasn't a universal way women would see me. Which ironically, me thinking them seeing me as that made them treat me as less. So now I want to come from the frame of already being successful, which I have been. I was trying to be successful to prove to myself I wasn't worth the shit I went through but now I see the belief comes first and then the women will buy into my frame. I'm rusty at this ha.

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Author:	Andrrei [ Fri Oct 07, 2016 10:24 pm ]
Post subject:	Re: Some Sticking Point
Quote: So you're suggesting ...... That's what i'm suggesting: Quote: be calm, relaxed, confident and take it slowly.

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