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How NOT to be NICE?
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Author:  CialdrinD [ Sun Aug 23, 2015 3:28 am ]
Post subject:  How NOT to be NICE?
I feel like i'm really nice guy when talking and approaching in the field, which doesn't create attraction.

How to be not that nice? How to show that MAN frame?


Any thoughts or advice?
Author:  oceanx [ Sun Aug 23, 2015 4:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
In your other thread you said you are getting some results. I assume you mean lays. Think back to those results: Did you have a "nice" frame as you describe it with these girls?
Author:  Eddie Fews [ Sun Aug 23, 2015 10:22 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Why are you approaching?

Whats your intention?
Author:  JackZero [ Mon Aug 24, 2015 12:31 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Being nice is fine and you can pull women. Being nice and not sexual will keep you from pulling women.
Author:  CialdrinD [ Mon Aug 24, 2015 4:14 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
@oceanx: I think i did. I start off with being nice, maybe qualify and make fun of them in mid game. But I can never start off being challenging or very rare!

@Eddie: It depends on lot of things, sometimes it's number close, f close. I have to change the intention of my approach through logistics!

@JackZero: That actually be the best point! Being sexual!
Author:  ChocolatePUA [ Tue Aug 25, 2015 12:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Quote:
I feel like i'm really nice guy when talking and approaching in the field, which doesn't create attraction.

How to be not that nice? How to show that MAN frame?


Any thoughts or advice?
Bust her balls. Tease her. Make fun of silly things that won't hurt her self esteem/ego too much. Deny her things. Tell her NO.
Author:  DW-Heart-Charmer [ Tue Aug 25, 2015 2:29 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
What are you creating? So we can give you more specific advise.

Is it that you hook the girls and then get them near the close and they say they just want to be friends? Are you facing LMR. Are the girls just walking off after the opener? Are you talking for hours but not kissing any girls?

Creating more sexual tension could be some good advise if we actually knew what was going on. As always be a man is good advise too, but what is it? And it does depend on what you want and how you get there.
Author:  CialdrinD [ Wed Aug 26, 2015 4:37 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
@DW-Heart-Charmer: At this moment, hooking seems to be the biggest sticking point and sometimes girls are walking off after an opener? I mean I understand logistics that they are in a hurry(during day game) but it's usually, they walk off and i don't know what to do. I even persist and go "you, come back here, I wanna talk to you" or "I'm not done yet"
Author:  On A Rampage [ Wed Aug 26, 2015 4:51 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Let her know you're attracted to her.
Author:  DW-Heart-Charmer [ Thu Aug 27, 2015 4:04 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Quote:
@DW-Heart-Charmer: At this moment, hooking seems to be the biggest sticking point and sometimes girls are walking off after an opener? I mean I understand logistics that they are in a hurry(during day game) but it's usually, they walk off and i don't know what to do. I even persist and go "you, come back here, I wanna talk to you" or "I'm not done yet"
When you tell a girl "hold on I'm not done yet." This is signaling an attachment to the outcome. The girls know long before you even say this that you are attached to having a conversation or even their opinion of you. It comes off needy. It would be better to be totally in the moment and unattached to what ever happens. You have your intent and you just play with her, if she wants to play then good. If not that is cool too.
Author:  CialdrinD [ Thu Aug 27, 2015 4:48 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Have you seen some of the RSD stuff? They do it all the time and i guessing they only put out the videos in which it works, however small percentage it is!

After open, how do you engage? How do you keep conversing?


@On a Rampage: I do, that's usually my opener, i try to be very specific in telling them what attracts me.
Author:  DW-Heart-Charmer [ Fri Aug 28, 2015 4:18 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Quote:
Have you seen some of the RSD stuff?
Somewhat. I am more interested in the Power of Now which Tyler talks about, but this is how it really works.
Quote:
After open, how do you engage? How do you keep conversing?
You just be normal. Your hook percentage in the daytime is likely to be much higher than your hook rate at night. Just being calm and unattached like a normal guy who is meeting a girl. If you can do that, it's not too difficult for her to be into it. I might say "hi I saw you and wanted to meet you." continued with something like "I thought you might be friendly..." Honesty and intention are most important.

I do emphasize that it does take practice. Approaching a girl can be scary for a lot of men especially during the day and in front of other people. But when you can get past this, be calm, cool, collected, and normal it just flows.
Author:  wilyone [ Sat Aug 29, 2015 3:05 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
If a guy told me "come back here I'm not done talking to you" or anything remotely similar I would consider him a douche. I'm not exactly sure why but that would be very unattractive.

Perhaps try not smiling so much. it's statistically shown that women are more attracted to pics of guys that are not smiling. Not scowling but neutral.

Also there is nothing wrong with being nice. What is fatal however is to totally fawn over a woman, let her know how much you like her etc too early. You need to maintain the tension and uncertainty. The essence of romantic interest is uncertainty. "Bad boys" do this naturally, but it's not being an asshole that makes them successful.
Author:  oceanx [ Sat Aug 29, 2015 6:26 am ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Quote:
You need to maintain the tension and uncertainty. The essence of romantic interest is uncertainty. "Bad boys" do this naturally, but it's not being an asshole that makes them successful.
Good point. Any guy should let the girl work for him a little rather than heaving a shitload of compliments on her.
Author:  EnsoNytes [ Sun Aug 30, 2015 7:47 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: How NOT to be NICE?
Is there a sticky on this "nice guy" "bad boy" bullshit? If not, there should be.

I suggest checking out this article. http://markmanson.net/woman-lovers-and-haters

The nice guy/bad boy meme is a generalization given to two types of guys on the opposite side of the spectrum. Nice guys aren't really too "nice". There is absolutely nothing wrong with being nice.

GIRLS LIKE NICE GUYS. What they DON'T like are guys that have no self respect or values. This is what society means when they say a guy struck out because he was too "nice". Being nice with the intent of getting something back in return is not nice at all. It is fundamentally dishonest. This is what "nice guys" do. They operate under the flawed assumption that being nice is how they get rewarded in life. They sacrifice their own esteem, boundaries, and values in exchange for love.

Bad boys are on the opposite side of the coin. They tend to overtly manipulate and step on other people's boundaries to get what they want. This is overcompensation and faux self esteem. On the surface, bad boys seem extremely confident because they just "don't give a fuck" about other peoples feelings. The truth is that going out of your way to manipulate other people is wasted energy and a form of neediness in itself. The whole "not giving a fuck" concept is a flawed idea. Everyone gives fucks. It is what makes people human. Bad boys maintain their self image by abusing others'.

The ideal guy is what you could call "integrated" (NMMNG by Robert Glover). Or you could call him well-rounded. Balanced. Centered. Grounded. Assertive. THESE are the types of terms we should be using when attempting to describe ideal masculinity. An integrated man has personal values. An integrated man understands that certain girls will be attracted to him and some will not. He has defined boundaries and upholds them. He doesn't let other people encroach on his boundaries, and in return he doesn't encroach on other people's boundaries. He doesn't blindly chase women, because he has values. If a girl doesn't appeal to his better values, then there is no reason to pursue her. He can also express himself freely knowing that some people will take offense and some people will love him. Full self expression means not being ashamed of expressing your sexuality as well.
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