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| Anxiety holding me back https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=181201 |
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| Author: | gentleman_bandit [ Sat Jul 05, 2014 6:42 am ] |
| Post subject: | Anxiety holding me back |
So i have been studying the game for a while now, and i know exactly how i should act, what i should say, ect. but i am too scared to do it. i feel like it comes from me gaming for validation as opposed to recreation, but how should i get over this? is there anything you guys say to yourselves to get you to do whatever? |
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| Author: | Chief [ Sat Jul 05, 2014 7:08 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Anxiety holding me back |
If you actually have legitimate social anxiety, like the doctor-diagnosed kind, you first need resources specific to social anxiety rather than PUA stuff. But if you mean "anxiety" in the general, everyday sense of the word, you're probably just being too attached to the potential outcomes because of the very validation that you're seeking. I'm impressed that, even with your lack of experience, you're introspective enough to recognize that you're doing it for validation instead of recreation. You'd be a good fit for my Seductive Introvert program. Anyway, what you need to do is to first validate yourself. You need enough self-validation to know that no matter who rejects you it will make absolutely no difference to you and your worth as a man. What do you think makes you valuable? What are you good at? Also, why would any woman be lucky to meet you? To date you? To hook up with you? Ponder these questions and fill in any gaps with action. |
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| Author: | gentleman_bandit [ Mon Jul 07, 2014 10:14 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Anxiety holding me back |
the problem isnt me having social anxiety (the medical kind) its more of me becoming less outcome dependant. the problem is a lot of my approaches are # closes when they could be F-closes. what i mean by anxiety is that im afraid the outcome defines me as a person, which it doesnt. this holds me back from being as outgoing as i potentially could have been. i see that, but im not sure as to what i should do to unlock that full potential. |
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| Author: | Mastermind9000 [ Mon Jul 07, 2014 3:26 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Anxiety holding me back |
Quote: the problem isnt me having social anxiety (the medical kind) its more of me becoming less outcome dependant. the problem is a lot of my approaches are # closes when they could be F-closes. what i mean by anxiety is that im afraid the outcome defines me as a person, which it doesnt. this holds me back from being as outgoing as i potentially could have been. i see that, but im not sure as to what i should do to unlock that full potential.
Then it sounds like you know what you are doing. Just keep at it. You aren't getting all these f-closes YET... big deal. You don't sound like you are having too much trouble with process itself, it's just a matter of getting better and doing it more so that you ARE comfortable. Are you chickening out or not seeing chances until too late? |
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