PUA Forum
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/

Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can open
https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=173753		 Page 1 of 2
Author:  Vuurvogel [ Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:17 am ]
Post subject:  Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can open
I'm having trouble being noticed by girls, I mean they always say you HAVE to make eye contact before you approach (and I agree with that).. (and what I have in mind here is, smile to a girl, she smiles back, raise you glass to a girl, she smiles, dance with her from afar, she dances back, something like this, right? because after sth like this u can open up safely)

but most of the time its just impossible to make eye contact with that hb9.. because she is standing in group talking with other girls or too busy dancing or whatever. So how in the fk** do you open that?

(However when i do manage to make eye contact i manage to open properly most of the times)
Author:  Chief [ Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:30 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
What you're talking about is what Gambler refers to as "Forcing IOIs." It makes opening a hell of a lot easier.

If you can't get their attention to force an IOI (her smiling back or raising her glass back at you, etc.), you might want to inject some flash game into your routine.

Flash Game is basically the harder way to do the whole "forcing IOIs" thing. It means to do attention-grabbing stuff that gets the whole room looking at you, such as dancing crazy. Do just a little bit of flash game and you'll eventually catch the attention of whoever you're trying to get the attention of!

Or, you could, you know, just cold approach.

But you don't even have to do a full-on approach. You can make one or a couple incidental/accidental smaller approaches to get her familiarized with you a little before you actually give her your full attention, such as by "accidentally" bumping into her as you walk past, grab her shoulders lightly and apologize as you make strong eye contact for just a second.

Seduction is paint that comes in many colors and the venue is your canvas. Explore it!
Author:  Vuurvogel [ Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:40 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Yes, I found not only does this make opening a hell of a lot easier, it also makes the possibly outcome or response a bit more secure !

I also found that cold approaching makes the woman feel like I have to prove something, I can just see they are always expecting a whole lot of me, (I think because cold approaching comes across as 'playerish'). I don't really like giving them that power!

I gotta try the accidental bump out sometime althought I think it would just make me feel so fake..

Thanks alot for your response Chief!
Author:  Chief [ Fri Jan 03, 2014 11:44 am ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Quote:
I gotta try the accidental bump out sometime althought I think it would just make me feel so fake..
That's just what I thought of off the top of my head when I wrote that post. I very strongly recommend that you improvise in the situation at hand to do something that feels more natural and not fake. Just follow your social impulses.
Author:  Vuurvogel [ Fri Jan 03, 2014 12:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
heh Chief, that's exactly why I came here :D
Because my improvisation wasn't sufficient enough, no inspiration :/
Author:  Cool Hand Luke [ Sun Jan 05, 2014 6:10 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Chief is right.... that technique is effective and I've used it.

Your statement I would feel fake indicates a deeper issue...the technique isn't congruent with your personality. In order to make it congruent 1) Keep doing it, repetition makes it feel real. 2) Change the technique to your personality, think about the underlying psychological principle and find something you'd like to do.

What I do in your situation, because I do get noticed- 1) Dress nice, nice hair cut, nice shoes, look put together...women notice and automatically assign you confidence. (Watch movie Crazy, Stupid, Love)
2) Proximity her. Move closer within 3 to 9 feet. All the women in that area will notice, including her.
3) Make a comment, action, movement, for IOI to her friend. She'll notice, then she'll be curious about you.
Author:  GamesSN [ Sun Jan 05, 2014 6:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
What I do in crowded clubs for social proofing is turn to face a woman even if her back is to me as I walk past a narrow gap between people then I look directly at her so her friends see as I walk past and take notice of me. If it's really packed i'll put one hand forward, put it on a woman's waist and gently move her to the side and make eye contact as she notices. There's nothing wrong with doing it unless you're actually feeling a chick up(Don't do that... Make it clear your intention is just to move her so you can get by -- Demonstrates confidence, control and leadership traits with this simple move).

I have found that simply making eye contact and holding it is all you really need for forcing IOIs. Don't back down. Women will scan around them from time to time, we do it too and we take in a lot of details specifically when someone's attention is on us. When we get that attention, unless they're being creepy and weird, we take notice and our interest will be spiked. Same happens with women but there's the social stigma of a woman being the prey and the man being the hunter so it's up to the man to be aggressive.
Author:  Vuurvogel [ Sun Jan 05, 2014 7:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Quote:
What I do in crowded clubs for social proofing is turn to face a woman even if her back is to me as I walk past a narrow gap between people then I look directly at her so her friends see as I walk past and take notice of me.If it's really packed i'll put one hand forward, put it on a woman's waist and gently move her to the side and make eye contact as she notices
Can you elaborate? Something just not right about that sentence man :p
Author:  Melodical [ Sun Jan 05, 2014 8:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
First get some preselection going. A preselected guy to a woman is like a woman with huge tits to a guy.

(which is why you can go out with your buddies and get no interest but go out with your GF and it's entirely different)

Then match and mirror the target till she comes across to speak to you. If you can match and mirror your preselection harem first then start leading them you can get the whole group matching and mirroring your target...that is very, very powerful.

I've extracted seated HB10's surrounded by guys in noisy night clubs by doing that.
Author:  `Feather [ Mon Jan 06, 2014 12:29 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
OK so ive noticed a lot of people are giving all these complicated strategies on how to get her attention etc.

ive been exactly where you are man, but then i realised there are a few reasons why they arent giving you eye contact etc.

like chief said, most times you have to cold approach because you look like every other guy in the club.
now you may argue by saying "but im more fasionable than other guys, im having more fun than them etc" but everyone has seen a fashionable guy in a club, and we see people having fun all the time....its really not that different.

i understand what you mean by saying a cold approach feels like youre trying to prove yourself to them. which is why im going to give you a opener that isnt needy.

walk up to her. if she is standing tap her on the arm, smile, and say "hey are you mean of are you friendly?"
this opener isnt needy because it makes her prove herself to you. if she says shes friendly, thats an IOI.

if she says shes mean tell her that you eat mean girls for breakfast and hope that she laughs.


in short, its very rare you have a girl looking at you long enough for you to get a reaction, and they almost never look across the entire room
Author:  GamesSN [ Tue Jan 07, 2014 8:35 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Beginning to feel like i've got some special powers here or something because i'm almost always able to lock eye contact and force an IOI at a girl. I'm not attractive. I'm average height, average build, average everything really. I look younger than I am though but i'm not old enough for it to be a big deal.

All I can say is you must be doing something wrong if you're not locking that eye contact in. Since forcing IOIs i've had so many women respond to it.

Here's what I usually do: Stand talking to a friend, look behind him but pay attention to what he says. While i'm looking over his shoulder i'll scan until I see someone that catches my eye then i'll lock eye contact. Usually they'll notice this if you're in their peripheral vision(Which is why I always have my back to a wall if i'm talking to a friend). Once they notice you they'll reciprocate that as their interest is aroused. Once they confirm you've shown interest by locking eye contact they will either invite you to approach or will approach themselves.
Author:  In$tinct [ Tue Jan 07, 2014 10:08 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
I think I know what's the deal here. I used to have this very same problem. Then I talked about it to a very plain-spoken woman friend of mine(girlfriend of a friend). And she told me that I kind of looked like a predator that was scanning for a victim in the room. And women sense that shit and avoid it. Now I didn't just stand there looking around, I was having fun but still looking around all the time and desperately trying to catch some girl's eye contact. Any girl's. It never came. Now as I changed my attitude everything else changed too. I started to walk away from my group and socialize with other people and have fun with them and stopped really caring about whether some chick was looking or not. Since that I have successfully applied this principle to my game(took some time, I have to admit) while I'm having fun with other cool people I just casually look around and unless the club is empty, or a sausage fest, a few girls are bound to check me out. And also, as others have said. Look nearby. Women don't look at the guys who are across the entire venue usually. Chief's "casually bump into her" thing could also work. And lastly, a little fun story that happened last summer...

I was out clubbing with some friends and I was in a generally good mood, had a confident vibe and was out to have fun. I was moving all across the venue partying with virtually everyone. And then I noticed a hot blondie was checking me out. I didn't quite want to do stupid shit(I have a gf) but I thought I'd check out what's the deal because there was something weird in the way she was looking at me. I walked up to her and started dancing with her. Then after a couple of songs she asked me if I had a cigarette. I indeed had and we went out for a smoke. I asked her something like "What was that weird look?" and then she went on that I was driving her crazy. She was looking at her left, and I was there, and then a few minutes later she looked to the right and I was there again, and then in front of her, and basically everywhere she looked I was always there. Of course this was a result of that I was moving around all the time.

Hope this helps.

Peace,

In$tinct.
Author:  Melodical [ Wed Jan 08, 2014 5:39 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Interesting story In$tinct, you might be on the verge of discovering something new...

Maybe you were creating an alpha male high territory DHV?
Author:  In$tinct [ Wed Jan 08, 2014 6:37 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
I don't know about that, but I don't think we should analyze it so deep. I wanted to explain a simple principle. If you stay at one particular place of the room you will be less likely to noticed then when you are moving around. I mean, it's just common sense :D
Author:  Melodical [ Wed Jan 08, 2014 7:49 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Having trouble being noticed by girls, so that I can ope
Haha yeah...overthinking it lol.

The bit that interested me was when you mentioned her saying it was "Driving her crazy". That's a strong response for something so banal as walking around a lot...
Page 1 of 2 All times are UTC
Powered by phpBB® Forum Software © phpBB Group
http://www.phpbb.com/