Whenever I approach a girl for sex, I freeze up or say something stupid midway into the conversation. I've blown myself out of 100 sets this year just because of this. People have suggested I try "approach drills" with things like "Hi" or "What time is it?" Unfortunately I am way beyond this point and this will not benefit me.

I can talk to women just fine for other reasons, but it most typically comes of as insincere. Whenever I want to get sexual with a girl I start self-sabotaging and making mistakes. This is due to a problem in my psyche resultant of bad parental conditioning mixed with insecurity due to repeated failure and lack of success.

My current idea is that I need to build myself up, but I don't know how to go about it. Weeks ago I just played with girl, touching her arm and stuff, and she started whining, "Why are you doing that? Stop." And then she left. It was strange, because I thought it was going somewhere.

Today I was talking to this girl and she was into me, and then I thought about having sex with her and I didn't know what to do or say. I figured I should get closer and touch her or get her to touch me or something, but I got too uncomfortable and failed.

This sticking point has caused me to waste an entire year of pickup in college because I have done this same mistake with hundreds of women my entire life. This sexual anxiety is a huge problem and I am not sure how to solve it. Having sex with hookers or seeking therapy really won't help me because the issue is not so much with sex as it is with problems believing girls actually want to have sex with me, since every time I have ever made a move or tried to have sex with a girl I have gotten rejected.

I am tired of this crippling cycle, and I would like suggestions on practical ways to overcome this problem. Simply talking and making friends with women I do not think is the answer, as some have suggested, as I am already plenty capable of this. The problem is that whenever I go beyond friendship with women, they reject me. Sometimes when I talk about sex with girls they get all prudish and think it's weird. It doesn't make sense to me. It is like women do not view me as a sexual man or take me seriously sexually. This is only a feeling and may not be reality.

Do you have girl friends that you friendzoned and that you absolutely do not want to fuck because they're ugly and/or fat? Do they want to fuck you?

Perhaps your issue is thinking about sex too soon. When you're in the zone and ramping up attraction, you shouldn't be thinking about sex. Physiologically, you may get hard or wet, but mentally you should still be focused on getting to know the girl, having fun friendly banter, etc.

Here's an idea... Try approaching HB3-6s that you don't want to lay. See if you can get them to fall for you. With time, perhaps you'll build more confidence and get out of the unfavourable conditioning you underwent as a child.