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| Im not getting people interested in me https://pick-up-artist-forum.com/viewtopic.php?f=56&t=161716 |
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| Author: | bhawker [ Sun May 05, 2013 7:50 pm ] |
| Post subject: | Im not getting people interested in me |
So I have been doing a lot of internet dating. I seem to do an ok job at getting women to go out with me, but I can't seem to get a 2nd date. Even the times when it seems to go well I still can't get them to go back out. Over the last 3 years I have probably gone out on at least 60 dates and only 3 women have gone on date 2 with me. Of the 3 women 1 lasted about a month and the other 2 were gone after the second date. I think my problem is that I am boring. I know that I should be casual and light hearted and get them to laugh, but I struggle with this. I can't seem to build off their answers with witty comebacks and banter. It always leads to awkward silences because I keep running out of things to say until it just becomes time to end things. I realized this last night when I couldn't get my date to smile. At one point she kept yawning. This seems to be the norm for me and the only constant through all this is me. I am struggling with this because I think it is something that just comes naturally. Either people have it or they don't. I guess I am wondering if there is a way to learn this? |
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| Author: | Jay (Majik) [ Mon May 06, 2013 2:30 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Im not getting people interested in me |
Quote: So I have been doing a lot of internet dating. I seem to do an ok job at getting women to go out with me, but I can't seem to get a 2nd date. Even the times when it seems to go well I still can't get them to go back out. Over the last 3 years I have probably gone out on at least 60 dates and only 3 women have gone on date 2 with me. Of the 3 women 1 lasted about a month and the other 2 were gone after the second date. I think my problem is that I am boring.
I know that I should be casual and light hearted and get them to laugh, but I struggle with this. I can't seem to build off their answers with witty comebacks and banter. It always leads to awkward silences because I keep running out of things to say until it just becomes time to end things. I realized this last night when I couldn't get my date to smile. At one point she kept yawning. This seems to be the norm for me and the only constant through all this is me. I am struggling with this because I think it is something that just comes naturally. Either people have it or they don't. I guess I am wondering if there is a way to learn this? I don't know how many times I've got to tell people on this forum but internet dating is a fucking waste of time. YOU CAN NOT BUILD ATTRACTION THROUGH A FUCKING COMPUTER!!! You need practice interacting with people... period. That is the reason you are not getting attraction. You are boring because you are not getting out and interacting with people to create interesting stories for yourself. Stop relying on internet dating. |
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| Author: | confidencemagnet [ Mon May 06, 2013 5:19 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Im not getting people interested in me |
My suggestion is to get off your ass and talk to girls everywhere. Talk to that old lady who's ringing up your food at the supermarket. Talk to that dude who changes your oil. My point is talk to everybody. The most interesting person can talk to anybody. Stop thinking about stuff to say and just talk. You think you have to be cool all the time. A man who's always trying to be cool will run out of material. A man who just talks always has something to say. You: Damn, every time I see you you're stuffing your face with that sandwich. You could at least give me a bite (said with a smile) Her: Oh, I got it from over there. You: It smells good, what's in it? Her: Pepperoni, onions, green peppers, and cheese You: I think I'm gonna get me one right now I'll tell them you sent me. What's your name by the way? Her: It's... You: What else do they have? Her: Fries, burgers, sandwiches... a lot of good stuff. You: How long you gonna be here? Her: I'll be here for another hour or so You: Good, now I'll have some company when I eat. You see how anything you say is cool as long as you say it with confidence. We don't do exciting shit everyday and even if we do something exciting everyday, people will still get tired of us talking about it after a while. You want to be a confident man who has the ability to talk and say what's on his mind. This is the challenge. Once you can do that without expecting fireworks, you'll never run out of shit to say. |
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| Author: | bhawker [ Mon May 06, 2013 8:03 am ] |
| Post subject: | Re: Im not getting people interested in me |
Thanks for the replies. My problem is that I have moved to a new city and have been totally alone. I have struggled to even make friends here and ones I have are all married. I have never been the most outgoing person so going to social places by myself is uncomfortable for me. I have been using the internet as the way to meet women which I have finally realized is just not working. You guys are right. I just need to start interacting with everyone and practice conversing with people. |
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